champagnelace.livejournal.com

Did you think I would forget how to love? It's like riding a bike. Everyone falls off and scrapes their knees sometimes.

You blinked away the tears. Chest heaving up and down, you broke out in quiet sobs all over again. You feel your heart beat a painful throb, and it was a different kind of ache - a literal ache, not metaphorical, not a figment of imagination, it was real and you could feel it groaning in hurt. You clutched your chest, excruciatingly aware of the quivering sound of your teeth and arms. Yet, in next to no time, you stopped your tears. Anger surged throughout your body, like an irate volcano lashing out and drowning the world in its lividness. How dare anyone do this to you? How dare anyone look down upon you? How dare anyone breathe lies into your face?

You felt as if you were wounded all over. Disappointment clings onto you like a parasite grip, and you watched the clock tick-tock by at a vexingly slow pace. When good fortune falls, neither an hour can be added nor a lost hour be recalled. Here comes bad times, and miserable moments add on like an element. Bliss is scraping at the bottom, and you shook your head, blinding yourself to any sweet actions done or had since happened unto you. You are scarred, deeper than ever this time, a huge gash upon your soul, threatening the composition of your emotions. Look at the happy moments; you tell yourself, they slipped by with the stealth of an illicit lover in the breaking hours of morning light, and no sooner will bad times join in the mix. The impact was colossal, your heart beat quickens and thunders in your ears. You can feel your pulse pound ominously, as if blood will be drawed away from you, and your soul sucked out of your life. It was like huge tsunami waves crashing against your boundary, before you crumble down and submit yourself to the waters that menace you into darkness.

Mentally, you asked yourself, why bother? Yet you know your heart was never carved out of stone, but you know well enough that you needed this break, to sort the things in your mind that had already formed a massive cobweb, waiting to be unraveled and solved. The agony was once again tearing her apart. The emptiness, loneliness, need for reliance has now, once again, become self-sufficed matters. Why do the people you love most always have to hurt you in the most terrible ways? Thoughts are becoming incoherent as your vision blurred. Your lips cracked at the slightest twitch, yet the refusal to move anywhere was too strong. Your brain has grown to a mass of wool, which carries a tinge of weariness. You got to be strong, you know there are friends, but what now – what exactly? Frosted glass colours your future and you know not when and how to move the next baby step. You forced yourself not to feel any slimmest pinch of sorry for your ‘cruelty’ and unkindness. You fend yourself away from defiance thoughts, though bleak, but still defending all odds of possibilities. To step back, and to watch; fed with apprehension and anxiety – as to what may happen, it may all be negative, but at least an answer will be woven out of all complications, no matter what certain desire there is, daring you to succumb to it. But no. Not now, not yet. Time is what you really need.

Still a five foot three frame of steel walls and consternation, still tentative, still helpless.

First him, now you.

I am gonna die tonight.

Yogurt digs!

Meanwhile, there's a couple of CDs i am totally dying to get my hands on

Everything but a girl - Acoustic ( Its the bombzxzx)
Wowjazz!
High Society (a whole new crazy collection of songs and awesome classics!)
- A Love So Beautiful
- Music to watch girl by
- Burt Bacharach
- We got the soul?/ Passion?
And one or two more which was rly nice! Man, I'm so gonna turn my future home, into some jazzy classical acoustic music library!

I've been feeling a tad weird these days. Maybe it's just a dose of sickness that's doing all these to me, or maybe just so many things occuring at once. But in any case, i've been wanting many things, when I'm penniless. Yes, zero cents with me, and yet my bank of wants is growing. I don't wanna become those materialistic, shopwhores kinda girls.The most basic example, would be more clothes, more desses, more skirts. And then, i cannot really remember. I think i know i want many things, but they just come and go, so -.- whatever.
I want a pair of tickets to CATS): Sobs. But it's sold out for students tix, and the rest that hasn't been sold is really too pricey. I want to stuff myself with nachos while watching movie, but Im currently not at my best state of health, so darn. I want that pencil case I've been eyeing on at PageOne, but my boyf has gotten it for me! YAY! I actually told him, and he got it for me straightaway. I felt so bad, like a spoiled little girl but yay yay yay! He's the best x 100000000000.
And I haven't been out on a movie date for so damn long. How many months have it been? One, two three? Yeah, it is that bad ): How long have i last went cycling, for the sea breeze that lifts up my hair, and the wind that carries our laughter along the sandy coasts? How long has it been since I last went swimming, feeling the familiar scent of the water brushing across the skin of my body, and feeling the surge to move through the waters? How long has it been, since we spend many carefree dates together, without giving any shit about money, school work, exams, etc? Too long to remember. And now, sickness is what holds us, and it is what slips our time away. Or maybe my idea of fun is too narrow, I should start thinking of ways that keep us preoccupied WITHOUT spending a single cent. I suppose that's quite easy. I got a couple of things not done yet, scrapbook for the most urgent and important task on my list of things to do. And yet it is always pushed back, so much for the urgent factor. Haha, damn the school (again). I guess people have the same, dumb mentality that people in the arts have it all. Fun, slack timetable, no labs, less work, more play. But for me, it is jsut the same. My own timetable is cramped (well at least for the first term). Or maybe my lack of time management skills is the cause of everything. I havent taken anything familiar in my combinations, except Math. My GP fails me, geography's been blah, you get the idea, and well econs and all that? Lit? Wtheck?! Big ha-has to me. But i guess it's too early to tell, I HOPE. Right now, i still feel like playing. I wanna learn tennis outside, to no avail, i want to learn piano, yeah kinda late isn't it? Strictly on terms, I'm kinda talentless. But i'm not evoking pity or whatsoever. I don't need consoling words, i actually feel okay with it. Because i got the most wonderful boyfriend in the world :DDDDD I know things happened, and they already did. I made my choice, my stand. And I'm here with him. So that's that. I don't care how many of you out there disapprove, or clicked your tongues at the decisions made. He's been here, always by my side, all the time. And when i say all the time, I mean every single moment, everytime that I needed him, he's always there. A phone call away, a text away, or just one call, and bam wham, he's there right beside me. Sometimes, i think i fail as a gf, but he's made me fall in love with him again and again. It's crazy, and in many crazy times, i wanna strangle him and tell him to stop being so nice to me. And he's my primary source of entertainment. He makes me double over with laughter, and he's forever making silly faces to amuse me. Like, right when I'm typing this, he's using his webcam and making really cute and retarded faces. Oh my goshhhh, I swear something's wrong with him. But I love him, for this very reason too. And love is not blind, this is a bloody misconception. I can see the things he has done for me, its a whole massive lot of them. If you want to stretch them from end to end, there will be no end. He is not THE boyfriend, as so many bimbos in the world love to name it in their ljs and xangas (because it sounds so damn cool?), he is not JUST boyfriend itself, he is MY boyfriend, MY world, and MY everything. He is Dan Poh, the love of my life! And i love bragging about him to my friends, so there. This is not just an addiction nor an obsession. I was really happy when someone made a passing comment about how sweet we were. And it got me thinking (because i didn't before), that it is true. We stand by each other no matter what. Like I said, things happened. Not just between us both, but individually. And when i felt I couldn't breathe anymore, he was there.
To remind me to take that very breath.

The cold water splashed hard on her body.

Without a flinch, she drew herself closer to the water, gushing downwards, flowing over every single inch of her body. She knew her body was sore and aching, her legs were scratched and her skin should have reacted with the water. Yet she was anesthetized by the physical surroundings, oblivious to her sense organs. She silenced the tenderness and wished with all her might, that the water can in turn silence that certain emotional pain inside of her.

She forced herself to relieve all the episodically events, every single bit of them, she took in her stride, knowing she will fall deeper into the pit hole. Her tears formed in an instant, and she surrendered, finally, to her heart, breaking and hurting at the very moment. She sobbed silently, coughing into the water and covering her mouth, lest she let out gasps of pain. Sorrow and devastation, her mind could only replay that same line, that seems so ever fresh in her memory, “Do you know, how much my heart is breaking because of you?” She should have known, that the worst feeling isn’t when your own heart cracks, it’s when you created a deep dark fissure in that one person’s heart you never meant to hurt, ever, that one person whom you dutifully love with every pump your heart beats, every blink your eyes make and every breath you take. The wrenching was more than bearing, it was tearing her apart. She turned the tap further downwards, hoping, wishing, and longing for each droplet to wash away her peccadillo, her wrongs, and her sins. The force of the water kept her remorse alive, to remind her just how undeserving she was of others’ love, and how she has grown a cowardly and useless shell over her back, having to carry it and disappoint her only true love, yet again. Flames burn in her stomach, and she felt her heart wrenched for a second time. Strangely, she willed for more painful memories to be replayed, like a roll of film reversing backwards. She knew she couldn’t acquaint with anyone about her life outside, or even in her very house. Her insides were screaming at her to stop thinking, feeling and thinking, and inevitably, the images popped into her, tormenting her mentality every moment. As she recalled how she walked through her day, distracted and preoccupied, she felt choked up with negative emotions, almost ready to burst into zero existence if she had the chance. She was exhausted, definitely. She ran, ran for her life, hoping that in some corner, she can trip, fall, and disappear into the greens below. Dirty as for sure, but rid of all problems. She battled with her mind all the same, deciding to take the gutless and spineless way out. Her lungs ache, but she ran all the same. She was hoping to be saved from that damn salvation, wanting to blame the whole world for everything, knowing that it’s a mistake to run right from the start. And yet when she started, she realized just how fast her mind shut out all recollections.

Traumatized and distressed, she finally recognized the fact that she wasn’t in the right state of mind emotionally. Even after running, she felt as if she was in a daze, regret filled her heart soon after, yet she blinded them away, unwilling to be condemned, not just yet. She was in daylight daze, seemingly unfazed by anything around her. She couldn’t even remember herself at the moment, and it was what she wanted, wasn’t it? No. Cold hard truth. No. The pain she had caused to another from her own root of pain, was a million times worse than anything else. Yes, being upset and disconcerted could not serve as a reason to explain her outrageous behaviour, her selfishness, her inability to place him before herself. Mere excuses. The consequences faced afterwards, how she had to see the agonized look in his face, every new and unsullied painful truth reliving through his mind, with her very own eyes, how much she fucking hate herself more than ever…

Snapping back to reality, she turned off the running tap, rubbed her skin incessantly, before dressing up to cover her skin. All that’s left to do is to start picking up the pieces where she left them, and do her best, and do what’s even beyond her ability to undo her mistakes. She will damned-it do whatever it takes, even if it means everything.

It always dawns on you too late.





A friendship forged seven years back. Started out so unstable and rocky, as adolescents, we were already gossiping about each other, yet appearing to be buddies. And yet, few months later, we evolved into true friends unexpectedly. Though there were no memories both of us can recollect, we often mused over the mere fact that we got together as steadfast friends, and years later, we grew to realise that quantity of meet-ups were never impt, it was the quality. We never had stormy tiffs actually, though there were a number of times you left me mysteriously for another gang. Recalling back, you weren't the stand-by-me-no-matter-what kinda bestie, and yet i still viewed you as one. Now, I am really questioning myself if that is plain foolishness or all but just my willingness to stubbornly think the best of you still?

Perhaps it's predominantly my fault, for suddenly intruding in your life 4 months back. You helped me without further questions, and accompanied me till i got better. I was grateful for your company, thankful that I had you as my very best of friends. And yet, i withdrew from you almost immediately when things were alright again for me. I guess I've always held on to the slightest hope that you might be happy for me, for getting what/who I always wanted, because that's what make me happy too. But again, I guessed wrong. You were not pleased apparently, though you breathed no word about it. I dare not talk to you about my emotional feelings nor my innest thoughts, for fear that i may jsut lose you as my friend altogether.

When somebody kind of indicated to me that you aren't what I perceived you to be, I was defiant and defended you straight away. I felt tons of remorse, building up inside of me like the raging fires in a volcano. Because over those particular past few months, you had proven to be a very good friend, even though at that time we weren't talking as much anymore. Or so I thought. I should have sensed the wall you subtly build against me, I should have expected that, and yet I did not. Was it my constant obstinency to think the best out of everyone, especially you, or was I too conspicuously unintelligent and unobservant?

You knocked out all breath in me, in a very distressing manner. Just that one simple line. Is, or rather, was our friendship really that superficial. I was rather disturbed before, by how you wanted money for your own use, when days ago, you were chatting to me happily about how your parents are going to reward you for your results. Yet, I know it was my fault to start with. But you have gone too far. I can never forget that one simple line, which jarred my mind with one unexpected blow. The sudden emotional disturbance created the most humane physological reaction in me. I did not bawl my eyes out, nor did I cry out in obstreperousness. One convulsive gasp, before i started weeping. And as fast as I started this rather hapless act, I stopped. I couldn't be more thwarted in my emotions and perception of you. You put me in a quandary condition, one that I know not what to opinionate of you.

But it became clearer this time. When I heard of how you wrote that comment, which drowned all hopes of salvaging this friendship, i plunged into a cognitive state, my thoughts disorientated. I'm sorry i had to say this but you strike me with disgust when I saw it in my own eyes. How could I not notice this was coming? How could I be so sightless as to not realise all these? Why was it that, even after the many times you ran off with the others, witnessing the forlorn me dragging my feet along during camp, I still forgave you just in a mere blink of eye? Was it my imbecility? I balanced out my feelings good and proper this time, and I looked back at it with apathy. Your scorns were met with my disapproval. If you wish to be disconcertingly blunt, and purposefully hurl hurting remarks at me and him, I have got nothing else to say.

I do not wish to condemn you, nor do I even blame you even now. Though I was flabbergasted at your crude remarks, and lost all will to keep this friendship going, you will be that someone who has walked through a part of my life, in one way or another. And nothing can change that. I still love you, as a friend, even if you still are or not.

Is our friendship now void of value and meaning? Or have you threw it away into your past already?

Was gonna do this for a long time. Wanted to continue, but i think i want to stop right where it begins. Could have easily deleted this entire thing away, but i didn't. No, not because of the long history of memories, but rather, the memories which i find myself being the happiest girl in the world, so loved, so smittened, so on top of the world. Oh God, how i miss everything. Was at Takashimaya looking at all the cute stuff, and my head burned, exploding with so many ideas and things i wanna do, for someone special. Yes, and i remembered the mistakes i made, and i cant forgive myself anymore. So yes this is it.

(ON HIATUS)

Being miserable, is because. I've forgiven everyone else, but the only person i haven't forgive, is me.

I promise i wont abandon you, my dear old blog. I guess its just me that i dont give up on things for new stuff. Yes, not even for the really classic lj which is far more advanced than blogspot. I'll stick to you and simplicity, and where i've started, originally.

“If you love someone, and they break your heart. Don’t give up on love, have faith, restart. Just hold on.”
Still like this quote.

PEOPLE MY EMAIL HAS BEEN HACKED SO PLEASE LEARN TO BE SMART, BE VIGILANT, BE WHTEVER. ITS SO NOT FUNNY BUT STUPID LILI SUCKS.
The following is Lili's great kindess to help me mass email everyone since my email got hack and i got zero contacts ):, well in the form of a very amusing, and totally retarded form. Here goes:

ATTENTION: Rachel's (My) email has been hacked.

Greetings!

If you have noticed by now, you should have received an incredulous email from Rachel Soon being stranded in some part on our beautiful Earth.

Don't be DECEIVED!

She's obviously still blissfully living in Singapore, attending school everyday as usual.
Apparently some really intelligent hacker hacked into her account, and sent all of us that incredible tale.
Please don't despair, or send that hacker into condemnation. We should be thankful that someone is there to provide us with laughs, what with our mugging every minute of the day.

In any case, please add Rachel using her new email account, she's kinda lonely with a blank msn account. (OKAY JUST KIDDING!)

rachel.0422@live.com

PS: Go read that email if you can, you could do with some laughs. Apparently he/she doesn't know that we're living in a new age, old tricks don't work anymore.
Practice SRQ, try to falsify his/her claims!

Your Sincerely,
Lili Teo.

HAHAHAHAH so there you go. Miss Drama Queen is totally hers! ;D Thanks lili! ;D But shes goign to be condemned, because yuying said to her this:

ζζÞטđđįמģ.::]] life IS a bed of roses; minus the petals and add the thorns. says:
ur email i deem as an insult to our intelligence

HAHAAHAH. Lili is the best man. So lame. I never met someone so retarded before -.- Okay so not funnny. I hate it. Melanie, bernice and all the ny ppl who might be reading this. Add me back ;D

Hahah sitting with stefanie is really hilarious. Her actions and remarks are so crappie. That stupid girl. Shes been feeding me with jokes, not very flattering but otherwise damn funny. The jokes werent very funny but the way she find the jokes funny make me laugh. Haha her laughter is damn infectious. Haha and eva's like polluting our mind with the jokes. Stefanie is secretly a R____! Hahahahha, she sms me just to tell me she got the wrong version of this joke abt pppl stuffing fruits up their butt -.- haha omgosh damn funny la. And she jsut have to tell me wht happened at the third ep of Gossip Girl!!!!!!!! Oh gosh i want to kill her. AND LILI!!! WHY DID YOU TELL HER. STUPID GIRL! I know you're reading this! Hhaaha, i am so goign to watch ep 4 and scream wht happen into your ear ;DD

OMGOSH I CANT BELIEVE STUPID JIAQI ACTUALLY POSTED THE STUPID OBAMA/OSAMA MISTAKE I MADE ON HER BLOG. HAHA SUCKER! I so can imagine stefanie going "You're so stupid i feel like slapping you now" (yes thats how violent she is) and rolling her eyes off, if she ever ever know wht i said. Hahah hmm she wont ever know, right ;DD

School's kind of boring, and we all ended up talking and laughing. Stress is getting into us. Esp me. Couldnt believe i fall asleep without knowing. Hmmm, my heads been hurting. Again):

TO HELL TO THAT PERSON WHO TOOK MY BLOODY HUNDRED OVER PLUS BUCKS AWAY.

Nothing seems to be going right.

Shucks. I cant do trigo i cant do trigo i cant do trigo. I cant do P&C, i cant do matrices, i cant do this. And hell, i cant do chem, like seriously i cant. All my huge lack of conceptual understanding. And gosh biology is boring me. Physics, i bloody cant do physics. And i want to cry. Like urgh. Someone save me. I feel so damn stupid i dont know what to do. I dont even feel like studying. And chinese, dont be fooled by the marks, i cant do the cloze passage for nuts!!!!!!! I RLY WANT TO SCREAM. English, no hopes. I fluctuate here and there, if the topic given is something like war or some crap, i'll fail and say bye. I cant even do SRQ!!!! Humanities, i always flunk during the major exams. I realised-.-, just cant get any of these right. Education is meaningless and all i want top do now, is to bury my head in my pillow, cry and scream my head out.

Bye.

My grandpa pulled me away for a short talk this evening. And i wasn't exactly very nice him because i was tired, and i knew what was coming. Grades. It was like a repeat of my and my mum squabble, abt her comparing my grades in CA1 and CA2. And i was like, wht the hell is your problem, i every year also will fluctuate. Im a human, and humans make mistakes. You cant expect me to maintain a certain grade for like every term? Not like the papers standard dont change. She kept bugging me about it precisely because my rs grew open. My grandpa was nicer to me. But still, long-winded. It made me pissed at him, pissed at myself, pissed at the whole world. And yet, i find myself tearing at his words. Which at this point of time i suddenly can't remember, (or is it just choosing not to rmb). Maybe it hurts, but right now i really dont knw wht trigger me. Twice i find my vision blurring , and even though my response was like shit, because i somehow cant decide being teary/grumbly, i know its time to buck up. I hope i know though. Because sometimes you know, but you dont do the things you know. Ohwell, im just a hopeless emotional creature. In any case, he made a bet with me but i know it isnt much of the point. Wht he wants, wht my mum wants, wht this society wants, i just have to try my every best to give, don't I?

Pictures time!! Happy moments, as i remember how sweet these dates can actually be.


YAY BAKERZIN!



TCC!!! LALALA! Even though the prices went up like alot, but still!! Heh took many pictures, but i shan't post my favourite one. YAY I LOVE THIS GUY!

Im boredddddd. Think im going to waste this holidays away. Nooooooo): I hate school, why am i always saying that. Wehhhhh i hate end of years, its a bloody 50%!! Im afraid of biooooo and physics. Basically im afraid of the sciences. And english, and chinese and humanities too. Oh and math. Waaaaah im scared of all the subjects. Oh shit, die die die. Im lagging behind all the sciences smmore. And humanities. Okay thats like damn jia lat. Someone save me. I dont want school to start next week. Let this be an extended holiday until november! Then decemeber holidays will come. YAY! -.-, the books are really doing me in.

Just why the hell is everyone mugging so damn hard.

WHEEEE! CRAZY RETARDED NICE PHOTOS :D The trip back from esplanade on friday ;D






Yay its love that pulls us through.

Nobody understands me, nobody ever persists too. Guess i'll nvr find someone. Tears, tears, tears. They never fail to come, and they'll follow me the whole night through today.

Its hurt. And its showing. I just need someone to care, to care enough, to understand me enough through and through. I guess im asking too much.

I feel neglected. Really.



















I feel replaced. I feel something is changing, not me, but something definitely is. I know it. And this time my intuition is right.

PHOTOS TIME! TAKEN WHEN I RANDOMLY BROUGHT OUT MY CAMERA IN SCHOOL. SO FUN!


Eva! You posed for this ;D

Jasmine mugging, with her fav phrase " OH NO IM DOOM!!!"

?!?!!? STEFFFFFFFFFF LOOKS SO ... DESPERATE! HAHA!

Cherie said i mustnt blog this, so i did. That makes alot of sense.

Eva's doing.




You see her tilt.

Now you see me tilt.

Then sleep ;D (Dont ask why the rubix cube is on my desk, its all steFFF and her crazy craze for them.)


Wingyau's going to kill me if she ever see this!

HAHA. QIANWEN :D

PIGPIG! IS LOVE! Stef keep saying its damn qian bian, so she took a photo of it. How ironic.

Went to catch fireworks from France on friday with dannnn! :DDD Luckily we came early, cuz we thought it'll start at 8, so we were there at like 7 smth. It was scheduled at 9 but started later anyw. Hahah but it was seirously worht the wait because the fireworks were so pretty!!! And our spot was like seriously the best. You can see everything and the fireworks felt super near us. Whee pretty pretty. It was such a happy thing to watch the fireworks(: Yay! Didnt take any pics of the fireworks cuz we ewre too caught up in the feeling of awe while watching them. Hee.

Wonder whats going on. Dont want to figure it out. Complications dont work, but again oversimplifying things just makes matters worse. Im a simple person, really. Life just kind of sucks sometime, and happiness seems further away than I thought.

Rachel (Ong)'s all time fave Profiteroles.














And this is heaven! My Warm Chocolate Cake! Its nicer than TCC, pity it was so small. Shall go with Dan next time. I want to try my waffle ice cream and etc etc etc!! :DDDD

Thanks rachel for coming all the way down to pei wo. Whee i love my bestie ;D I think i wasted a lot of time your time, you must be mugging like shit. But i know you're reading this too. You deserve loads of hugs from me!

And i dont know where to start. Was it self radicalization or was it mere confusion of myself? Many times i come to realise i know nothing about myself, and i dont even knw if i even have a personality. I feel like a floating figure, just blending in with the crowd, just trying to please everyone, and yet in the midst of pleasing, i cant stop myself from showing the unpleasantness i felt when doing that. The only thing i know about myself is that im really weird. Like seriously so weird that i think nbody can ever figure me out. No one can because i think my thinkign is complex. And no, that isnt self praise, im ashamed of it. Im ashamed how Im just a fcked up someone, wallowed in my own small selfish world, being greedy and self-centred, always thinking that things shld go my way and i dont stop until things go my way. And despite that, i still dont try changing this really ugly blotch splattered in my sketch of life. This has really really really got nothing to do with whtever happened, its just totally random and out of the blue. Something/things been really really bothering for the past i dno, period? Yeah, i dno when it started. Is it a fear? Is it a worry? Is it just over sensitive? Is it insecurity? Nah i doubt so, i dont think so. I just dont get myself. Why the hell am i so irritable these days. why the hell do i get pissed off or upset over like serioously nothing? Why do i get sad and why am i never satisfied. True, im happy with some decisions, and i guess those are not a problem of satisfaction or wht now, i cant be more content with that, and its most importantly not the problem of never being able to satisfy me because i do get contented rather easily. I mean, really. And i think this just contradicted with whtever i said abt thigns goign my way, i dont know. Everythign jstu works so extreme in different situations that jsut leaves me really confused. Who the hell am I and do i have like zero personality? Sitting in the mrt station today for arnd 15 minutes just got me thinking. All these days i get frustrated so eaesily, never being able to hide my feelings, and gosh do i really need to start to make these negative feelings subtle. Why my smiles are growing lesser. Whats wrong with me. And i thought for so long, which just got me more frustrated, and my mind was blank, didnt know which mrt to take to where. So i just randomly took one to PS, then couldnt find a place to well study so as to get my mind off everything, then mrt to vivo, thinking perhaps the open area at the top level, which i think they call it the sky park or whtever, i can jsut sit somewhere quiet and stone. But nonono it was crowded with families and dozens over couples. I felt totally weirded out, like every corner, nono every step you take you can see couples k. But the night sky was really pretty. Though the moon wasnt full, there were like at least arnd 10 stars up there. But ah well it was so noisy, and i felt awkward even if i sit there, but thts if provided i can even find a space. So i just went back in and sat on those retarded green chairs. Stoned for another 20 mins and i was like forget it, i just think i need to change for the better, i need to be more understanding. Maybe i was too used to getting things my way, and i learnt how to spare a thought for others and learn how not to be selfish for once, and think of others, not just yourself, not just for your own joy or comfort or ease, but for others, their convenience, their happiness their worries. Learning it the hard way can jolly well be alas instilling it in my mind how i shld never be selfish and greedy.

Conclusion, pms-ing rly sucks. But im all fine now ;D I miss dan!

Whee havent been blogging for days. Been falling sick over and over again.So irritating!!! My stomach felt rly queasy, righ ton dan's birthday. Omgosh damn suay. Stupid jiale, she was saying i super suay over msn. Idiot man. Hahah and i've been falling asleep during lessons, because i havent been exactly feeling very well. Weh today didnt feel well again. Sooooo didnt go for the Connext singapore thingy which was rly lame anyw. And my sister is mean mean mean. Ah well time to get used to it. Hmm managed to go out with dan on his bday anyw. Whee dempsey hill!!! PS CAFE! OMGOSH its like super super super super pretty. The price is rly pretty too but hey the food was worth it! Like rly super nice, wanted to ask him to get the lamb but he refused. Idiotic man. Haha took some pictures aft that, then had to go home soon. Sorrrrrry): It was the best i could managed on tht day anyw. Sad sad nvm. Next year will be btr. At least i get to give him his card, prepared beforehand;DDDD I guess thts enough.
Went starbucks ytd. I swear im never ever ever going starbucks. Ew gross gross gross. The hot choc was so er xin! Bleah ):





LOVELOVELOVE YOU!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY DEAREST DANNNNNNNNNNNN!

Something for you:
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height.
My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight
For the ends of Being and ideal Grace.

I love you to the level of everyday's
Most quiet need, by sun and candlelight.

I love you with the passion put to use
In my past, present and future too.
I love you with a love I seemed to lose,
But now i've gotten it back ever since you stpped into my life.
I love you with every breath i take,
Smiles, tears, of all my life! and, if God choose,
I shall but love you better after death.

Been quite busy these days, quite tiring too. Haha but i know its all going to be worth it, everything will be. Lala shall just post a pic.

Haha singaporeans' mentality. When i was selling singfest tix at 160 bucks, those who are smart came to ask first and they got it. Then it was raised to 175, and there were a few more. Now its officially sold out, and then all the people stream in and call and sms desperately for the singfest tix. How retarded is tht?! Haha i was quite sad actually, because i shld have bought more tix!!!!!! And then sell to them like nowwww, im sure they will buy it. Shitttttt. Hahah nvm nvm, theres always other money making chances.
Hmmm been pretty busy these few days. And have been really sleepy in class which is quite unlike me. Haha dont knnow why, been rushing here and there. Time is tight, money is tight. Stupid la, i shld have just gone with the flow, my first instinct is always right, and yet im a worry wart, i question my instinct and in the end, i waste more time and energy. Like today!!! Wth. I look like some idiot, and got fooled arnd by more idiots. In the end things are undone and I really want to box myself aft tht. I rly hate it when im all set out to accomplosh smth and i dont get wht i want in the end. Hahah this term block tests isnt any disappointment even though i got lower than previously. Because i didnt put much hope into them in the first place. Effort iss liek totally er super little. Yeah cuz hey, studies aint tht impt. I want to do smth im happy and rly enjoy doing in the future, not dabbling in science, research, politics or news or whtever. I want to have a long term and stable one, so it has to be smth i really like(: And i know what it is and im alrdy preparing myself for it. Plus its forming! Lala my co partner ;D;D;D Lets rly start work soon!

Walking together beneath the soft sweet tears of the heavens above.
Mystical orbs of sapphire flame, myriad of outstretched hands.
And this sweet breath of impregnible protection I'll cherish.

LEVIS JEANS AT 100$
BRAND NEW
WITH YOUR OWN CHOICE OF MODELS (Original priced below 160$)

SINGFEST TIX AT 160$
DAY TWO

BOTH ITEMS WHILE STOCKS LAST!
CONTACT ME IF INTERESTED! LEAVE A TAG :D

I sometimes wonder what do people really mean when they blog. I sometimes wonder if they are trying to say something through their words. I sometimes wonder if im just taking their words too seriously.

Then again, I wonder if i even have a sister. It's kinda saddening to see how much we've grown apart. But question is, were we even ever close? I remember how from young she was never willing to express any sisterly love for me, not directly anyway. I remember I had to use a certain tactic to let her reveal herself that she actually wants me as her sister, but it grew off her anyway, because the next time i used it, she ignored me. But that was when we were really young. Young as i was, this sense of absence in sister love was already felt. And then we grew, and the more we moved on. The more our characters differ, and we never tried to understand each other. I seriously really truly wonder, what she wrote in the card, which rly made my eyes teary, because it was such a surprise that she wrote all that, and that i never knew she appreciated me as a sister, until on my birthday where i wrote her words. And i thought they were heartfelt, but, again, im questioning this all over again. It kind of hurts too, to see how she really treated me. to see how she's always overbearing, always thinking she's right, always glaring at me, giving me all sorts of crude remarks, never sparing me with all her words. Time and time again, I was hurt, but i never show it. Retorted back I did, hey i've pride too. She will never understand, because even I dont realise it until today. Many times, i've wanted to blog, to rant, to slander her with verbal abuse all over my blog. Always, always i stopped myself and remind myself i do love her as my sister, even though i dont show. I'm not an expressive person, if you are observant enough, or if you even bother, Im never a good person who can maintain frndships. Cliques drift away, people leave, I dont really bother anymore. Few care. But point is, will she ever noticed how much her dearest sister wants her to express love for her? Sounds wrong, but the bottom line is, she has never in her 14 years of existence ever ever ever showed me she loves me or even care for me as her sister. Perhaps she did, in a really indirect and irritating way. She has never been gentle on me, and her presence is sometimes too overbearing. Does she know that I am scared of her. Even when I want to request, merely for her phone or her tablet pc, I get the haughty look, she looking down on me, with annoyance written all over her face. I really don't know what to say, and I know she's not entirely at fault cuz i haven't been trying hard enough, nor making enough efforts anyway.
All I really want to ask is, dear sister, when will you come back to me?

Wanted to blog a thousand things today. Many thoughts ran through my head. But i guess, the only thing left to say right now is, the sole reason why i would get a condo in the future is so that i can just use the swimming pool at night, when i feel so much like swimming. Love the water, almost like a form of destress. Now i cant wiat for blocks to end. Why does it seem like i never study a thing. No mood. Didnt study much today. Think i'll end up disappointing myself and my parents. And nagging folllows and blahblahblah. Wow im good at negating my feelings. Do i even have self-esteem?

Anyway. Pictures.


WELOVETCC.

Shucks.

Parents spotted. At Island Creamery. Didnt know if i shld laugh or cry at tht moment. But Dan saves the day! Hahahahahaaaaaa as always(: been stoning in class for these few days, had laughing moments in Mr Lim's class, took 2 or 3 retarded photos with him for teachers day stuff, but i guess that was about it. If school is slack, i jsut get stonier. Oh mannnnnn, maybe thats wht blocks doing to me. Somehow think im extreme, cuz my mood can swing from here to the other end, and i dont even show it. I look the same but yeah i conclude this is blocks doing. Haha cuz this time round im unprepared, and i dont really am rushing to study or all that thingo. Which is unlike me. So why am i stuck at 16):
Annnnd rumours rumours. The first time a weirded out rumour about me is spread. And i heard of it. Haha if you hadn't, here listen: Rachel likes a guy from NUS who came to her class on her bday and kiss her in front of the whole class!!!!! Woohoo claps claps. Hahaaaaa, me liking about a guy from NUS is an understatement of course, thats the only fact. The rest is so not true. The class can back me up. Haha if it is rly true, the whole world will know by now, and it wont be just a mere rumour. Hmm smtimes wonder why ppl actually believe all this crap when it doesnt make sense. Heard another rumour too, but i guess i shant blieve it. Be gone rumours. And now im talking to myself. Haha august august here i come then!

DEMAND FOR PICTURES!!! MORE MORE MORE!!!

500th post will be a sad one.
Because, I'm always screwing things up.

Volcanic eruption of sweat.
& This is the aromatic scent of love's truest flavour.

OMGOSH I FRICKIN LOST ALL MY PHOTOS. HATE ME HATE HATE MYSELF. RAHHHHHHHHHHHH.

Ah well, i'm damn sad right now. I wish so much i can rewind time then i can be more conscious of what im doing and actually not lose them. Qi si wo ): Shan't talk about it lest im more sad. I do not like TCC for the time being. Haha, me and my stupidity and carelessness. Gdness. Anyway, friday was quite funny becausae we were suposed to do zuo wen and in the end zhuo lao shi forgot, as usual, and gave us a compre. But it was such a less stressful thing than zuowen tht me and stef sort of hugged each other, cuz we were laughing and being so happy, and she said 'lets hug!!!" hahaha i was dman amused tht time, so i patronised her. Oh well, school is fun if you are like tht isnt it? Whats more its the last year, in a all girls environment smmore. Im goins to miss this in JC. Suddenly i dont want JC. Can I just skip to the part where i aced my a levels and are preparing to go uni? Haha shit man, im delusional. Studying was kinda fruitful today. Considering the circumstances. Ran with Eva today, me and my good sense of direction. We ended up turning and turning and walked a whole huge round around maccritchie. Damn funny, 2 sua ku idiots. And eva made another wrong turn aft that, and we were just lost among the tress and mud. So tiring but so fun. We must have like walk 5km and ran like more than 5km. Mad mad, we were talking while walking through anyw, so it was rly constructive ;D Heh. We need Dan next time ;D His irritatingly but super good sense of direction. And his stupid stamina in running, and with speed. Omgosh is he idiotic or what? But speaking about him, omgosh DAN LOOKS DAMN HOT IN BLACK SKINNIES!!!!! Like the really glam black skinnies and not the Ah Beng style. He looks damn hot, and so very goodlooking. I cannot stand him. He looks so good i dont even want to look at him anymore. Hahaaaaaaa. Im not crazy, this is really totally from a honest and objective point of view. Tadah! If i've a chance, i'll definitely advertise his photo here but nah. Okay, time to finish my work.

Wingyau feels like chopping rachel into a million pieces!10:44pm
- Facebook


HAHAHAHAH IM SO AMUSED!!!!!! Funny funny, wingyau is a retarded person, and shes going to show me her trademark fist and funny face if she sees this. Hahaha and im just going to laugh at her even then. Im lazy to bloggg. Oh wellll, Sunday was fun because I went to the Taka Food Fest with family and Dan. It wasnt much of anything but we kept koping the honey. Not cheapo okay, honey's expensive stuff. Want to sample also sample expensive stuff first ;DD Wheeee, then we were running arnd which was rly retarded cuz he bullied me. Qianwen can vouch tht for me ;D If she can tell or smth. Hahhhhh. But it was fun, reached home at arnd 10plus. Im surprised my mum didnt scream at me or as much as nag. Thats so nice of her. Lalaaaaa. Whee went swimming today and felt like crap. Swimming somehow feels horrible today. ): Must be thinking of blocks too much. I think of the blocks thats nearing and im worrying but aint doing anything. PLus the many miscellaneous stuff waiting for us to do, the LA shitttt and personal statement, crap worksheets and quizzes, plus a bio SPA. Wahhhhh so idiotic, just before Blocks as well. They rly want to kill us. So sad. OKay no more procarstinating. I shall stop going out. By this week! LALA :D

The Male Brain is funnier! Hahaha this one doesnt even make much sense. Hahah but whtever ;D I dont understand why sex is closely related to listening though. Enlightenment anyone? Dan? HAHA!

Been kinda stagnant for a long time. I guess I'm not really into the blogging mood anymore ): Haha nothing much happen anyway. Dan came to my house on monday! Haha but he left shortly after. Played with his really pretty and um shiny clean laptop ;D Lalaaaa. Yay, i'm so glad that 4/14 didn't have to change classes with us anymore, or else it will be so ma fan for us. We can't eat on the third floor, which is a really stupid rule to have in school, and we have to travel down to the canteen and up and its just inconvenient. So we are all happy. And had change of seating arrangment. Even though I felt like there was not much of a change of seat plans, especially when our back row was just another combination, like she was trying to separate lili and me. Haha awwww, but we will still have fun discussions about nothing realted to the subject. We rock man. Going to have funfair tomorrow and sadly I'm missing it, like the first time in 4 years, and eva's actually happy. Idiot eva, i hate you forever man ;DDDD Hehehe. Going for MOE excel fest, wonder who will actually come so early to view boring school stuff, i'll probably and hopefully be rotting there. Anyway, JIAYOU 402! (: I'm sure we'll make a BANG with the BANGles!

I WANT MORE PICTURESSSSSSSSSSSSS ):

Never knew how tong ku it is to actually sing. It felt like a string pulling my head back everytime i stop to take a huge breath while singing, and when i sing, my throat hurts, so basically the whole head was hurting. Sad. Anyway, overdue photos!








Pretty Flowers!<3

Fell sick): Sadly. But im on my way to recovery! Wheee. i hate hate hate school. First week is horrible. Esp ytd): The class was quite chaotic. Haha and the weather was killing my head. Rah. PRacctically rushing worksheets aft worksheets. School feels quite unsettled. Guess i need to buck up. And i always say that. ): CME sucks. Why do we have to do project on that. Who cares abt the history of nanyang man. But like what jasmine says, it wld look kind of bad to see a failed grade for your CME. Haha stupid education system and their curriculum. Have to change class with 4/14 next week. Stupid.Now I have to climb 3 floors every morning/recess/lunch. Super inconvenient. Thanks la. And we are OBLIGED to accept their request because we can't say no. So sad. We've to play nice and we are reluctant to. New curtains are actualyl quite pretty. Cuz they are peach. Peach is a nice pretty colour. And it brightens up the class or else the old one makes it seem gloomy and demoralizing. Can't wait for blocks to come and end. Can't wait for end of JC:D

Had weddings the past two days. It was quite fun. Blahblah. I love buffet! They shld jsut have dessert buffet. I'll just gorge myself to death. I missed out quite a few dessert like Apple Crumble annnnd Tiramisu! Tiramisu is ex man, the rum or coffee liquor. Next time I'll just head over to that section first, if ever there's a next time. Lala. Haha I'm hopeless. I don't like seafood cuz its grossssss. Raw is so er xin! I'm just a simple person who eat simple food. Whee, help ppl save money man ;D

Under the starry night, soft proclamations of heartfelt words.

Oh gosh, what have i done?
I feel like the worst creep ever.

In this amorphous, ambiguent space, constantly shifting in locale;
adjusting to our presence, a place where love resides and wishes come true.
As sunlight filters through woven dreams, love space of our paths intertwined,
braided as a never-ending trip, pillows in the clouds of passion;
as time passes in our ever changing universe.

I did not just write that. Hah. Go figure(:

Thank You Lord

I thank You Lord, for the trials that come my way
In that way I can grow each day, As I let You lead
And I thank You Lord for the patience those trials bring
In that process of growing, I can learn to care

Chorus:
But it goes against the way I am
To put my human nature down
And let the Spirit take control of all I do
For when those trials come
My human nature shouts the thing to do
And God's soft prompting can be easily ignored.

But, I thank You Lord, for the victory that growing brings
In surrender of everything, life is so worthwhile
And I thank You Lord, that when everything's put in place
Out in front I can see Your face
And it's where You belong.

I do love this song. It's a song that somehow finds its way to your heart, that no matter how many times you listen to it, you'll never get sick of hearing it.

Is there another word for emo? I think emo isn't a right word. I don't do emo. Just hmm, moody perhaps. Yup a gentle word for it. Again, felt like running but didn't and now I'm regretting. Maybe tmr I'll go swimming. I like the waters(: But that being said, I NEED TO COMPLETE THT PILE OF HOMEWORK AND START STUDYING BECAUSE I'M LOSING ON MY HOLD ON THE GRASP ON THE REALITY OF EDUCATION AND STUDIES.

My thighs are getting fatter, my legs are getting uglier, my face is becoming more hideous, like seriously, my stomach's getting fatter, my hips are getting wider, my hair is becoming disgusting, my arms are becoming flabbier, my voice is turning gross and I sing worse than a crow now. So tell me why am I worth it? What good does it take to, hmm nvm. Wht am i talking about man. Simply trying to list out all the bad points I have that can be seen. So that you know.

Whoa, I'm good at demoralising myself. But anyway, I'm just stating the facts. So that's that.

Pathetic's the word.
Rah my gums been bleeding for the fourth consecutive day. Sucks man. I wonder if tightening your teeth or smth gives you such a result. I'm lazy to call the dentist too. Wanted to run just now, but didn't feel like it. Lazy again. Too sian to do anything. Shall rot at home and dieeeeee. But then again, I'm regretting it. I should have just run, run run run. I think I'd like the feeling of running until my lungs feel like bursting, and that's if tht feeling comes only after i run for really long. Oh well, but in any case, i feel super choked with emotions. I cant stand myself. I need to get a hang on myself and get into reality annnd stop being so hopeless and stupid.

Waiting can't get any worse. Can it?

I must have spoilt my phone by at least about 30% today. Kept sliding the phone, taking it out. The worst that happened was when I dropped the phone, and it was a loud hit on the floor. Biggest damage man. I guess i was really distracted. Seriously. Whole day was just so moodless for me. Bought shoes though. After walking arnd and everything. Yeah ok la. I like it. Swimming had to make me feel worse. Couldnt get into the mood of swimming. Seriously many things run through my head, but i can't rmb wht anymore. Then this stupid boy competed with me. In a way. I noticed aft he swam jsut beside me, then when i took off he took off. I didn't stop so he didnt. But too bad, i won him every lap. He gave up soon after. Stupid. Or maybe I'm thinking too much. Haaaaa. Doesnt matter. Then wanted to swim more, cuz i was like getting used to it, then i saw tht stupid uncle who practically stared at me while in the water, and give me that smile. Ew ew yuck yuck. I just took off straight away. Conclusion: Never Ever EVERRRRR go to the pool on fridays. Alot of people too. i dont like it. Mmmm, I'm bored and sian. I hate holidays because there are alot of work to be done and i dont knw how to complete. I still have math and bio ws, two chinese compo and two chinese book reviews, and a humans essay, two essay actually, plus the corrections one. And alot of catching up for chem and phy which i've not been listening to? Woohoo, I'm so not making myself feel better. Hmm let me see wht else. Just alot. CME SIA!?!?!?!?! HELLO JIAQI JASMINE JIALE!?! Haha forget it. I need moneyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.
I need you even more.

A relatively good week.
Tuesday someone came to my house and study. I think i keep asking math questions. Its like the longest math ws i've ever done. And then i realised there were like many mistakes later on. Thanks mannn. Haha. But it was quite cool cuz it was the first time i bake for ppl to eat! I was quite high during the night, kept singing while on the phone with Dan. Siao liao siao liao. I sound horrid and keep going out of tune. But just felt like singing. For like the first time too:D
Thennnn Wednesday went East Coast. Family Outing! Woohoo fun fun. Dan came with us! Whee my dad's power. Paid for him without both of us noticing and realising. Damn funny. Then cycled and had New Zealand's Natural! YAY! Super nice. Double scoop man. Dan is evillllll. He wants to make me fatter): But it was rly nice icecream and sorbet. Lala. He's retarded, went to ask my mum if we can go out the next day which is today! Hee cuz of free movie tickets stuff, HAHA. Funny man. But actually i sort of forced him to ask my mum so tht chances of going out is higher. Tralala my brother likes him man. JOVINA KOR KOR! :DDDD HAHAHA. My mum likes him to la, actually noticed he doenst have a proper water bottle and gave a nike one to him. Heehee. Funny. Whee sent him to his doorstep later on. Cool man. Bake again later on tht nice. Chocolate muffins! Yay i could smell it was nice, and my sister said it was nice. So i guess its nice? Maybe it's just the quality of the chocolate thts really good. But i like baking, with thoughts of baking for someone.
Today was better! Finally er ren shi jie! Wheeeee, watched Kungfu Panda. Ate at Swensens. The service at Suntec sucks big time. And the baked rice taste like shit, im just eating rice,plastic-like chicken and not very nice cheese separately. So people dont ever go there. I think the time we spent sitting there waiting for our food is longer than the time we eat. Should have taken pictures there and then. Pity there aint any): Just before he goes camp): So sadddddddd. Went for PC show aft tht. He purposely went to buy laptop tht goes with a camera. He sucks manzxzxzx. Haha. Then bought a printer tht comes with many freebies. Trolley trolley! We are cheapo ppl. Dragged the bulky trolley to MRT, and up down escalators. So funnnnn. Then i took some of his stuff to his house and met his mum for the first time. His mum quite cute, said many funny things to me. Yay i think no matter wht im always sabo-ing Dan. Wheeeee i rock i rock :P But so fun. Gave him muffins too. His house is messy but rly clean. Haha sounds impossible but yeah I nvr knew tht too. WHEE! Piggy piggy! Shall start saving money already. First time in a thousand years tht i've no money in my coin box. Tsk. But i got a pretty piggybank here. I shall fill it up and bring to the bank ;D Woohoo i'm crazy. But so happy. And in a sweet loveeeeeee!


This is interesting ;D

BOREDDDDDDDDDDD.
I WANT TO RUN MOREEEE. I WANT TO RUN RUN RUN AND NEVER STOPPPP.
I just felt like running alot ytd. For some reason. And luckily I did, because i never felt so happy runnning for a long time. Alot of times when i run in school, i was layz and tired and felt liek stopping. But ytd was just different. Whee its tht nice feeling tht came back. I wanted to run more if not for my mum's calls and my large intestine calling out to me. Haaaaa ah well. Lets hope the feeling will stay in me;D

Love is all I see when I look into your eyes.

Went on a known date with Dan today! Wheee! Everything was fine, and it was all good, except the morning part, but anywayyyyy, shant talk abt it. I'm super happy. Got nice matching tees, and got piggybank! Like literally a piggybank. Wahaha, a pretty one too! Finally found one. Walked around, still want to find a pair of shoes though. The ones at home like dying alrdy. Maybe i'll get a nice cheapo bag from the Pasar Malam downstairs as well! Woohoo! Okay anyw back to the point. Lunched and then walked to Heeren then to Centrepoint then to Plaza Sing. Couldnt get wht we want so we took a train to City Hall to go Raffles City. Ben and Jerry's! Wahaha evil dan. Refuse to let me pay. Next time im watching you eat if you don't let me pay the moneyyyy. No no, no more next time. The next time we are just going to eat the cheapo 60cents ice cream from Macs k ;D Kind of miss nice and simple icecream. Fancy ones sometimes get boring and leaves a sick taste in your mouth. Whee then went to Suntec and then to the Book Fair! Hohoho, we went there to laugh and make a fool of ourselves man. Damn funny. The whole day we jsut keep laughing and doing retarded stuff. People go book fair for books, we went there for magazines. Thanks la. Purposely bought retarded magazines. There were free Nivea stuff and pirated Kinder Buenos Chocolates k!!! The chocs just came in last minute. The auntie very funny, she was saying, your 2 dont fight over the chocs ahhhh. Haha we kept laughing please. Whee, then took retarded photos arnd the convention centre area. Whee loads of funnnnnn. Shared Muachee at my house downstairs. :D Hmmm cycling trip next week! Study date too! Tralala. This will be better than expected.

So many things happened the past days. Too tired to recall, or rather, i don't want to recall. I think i just want everything to be closed. Seriously. Damn sian already. Stupid woman, shes a stalker who sexually harasses not only one family but two. Everyday call and call. Now i knw why she do that. She does tht so that she can get the money more easily. She does that, knowing tht she'll tire out the ppl she calls and harasses, and in tht way, the ppl will be more willing to pay her tht fcking huge sum of money to her just to get her off their backs. Whoa is she smart or wht. Compensation also 800$? I burn hell money for her. Hope she enjoys the money in hell. Don't we all love her? Thanks for spoiling our times. Thanks for fabricating the untruths. Thanks for spoiling ppl's reputations in front of the parents. Thansk for screwing things up when things could go on so damn easily. Now tht you got the money you want, you big fat fugly old wrinkly money-faced bitch-hag-asshole, dont you dare come to harrass anyone ever again. And stop saying ppl call you, when obviously you are the one whos doing all tht damn calling. URGHHHHHH I HATEHATEHATEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE HER TO BITS AND PIECES AD I SERIOUSLY HOPE SHE BURNS IN HELL. Money sucks. Money rly brings unhappiness. I do not aspire to be rich, just want to have enough for life to get by. Simplicity is love. Anyway, having said, i do sincerely thank my frnds for their help. Pri schmates(: Esp Quek and Perry. Yep. Just always taking my calls :/ And i felt bad, cuz i got so many ppl involved. Esp Mj and yeah. Now i feel like i no face to meet anyone alrdy. Ah well.





You...


... & Me

THIS SHIRT IS NICE!!! :D I GOT GOOD TASTE!


EMOING. HES THINKING OF ME I KNOW :DDD HAHA!

F pissed.
And you call this a home. You do your stuff, i do mine. Ask me to hang my own clothes. When all along, we hang them together, not bothering whose is whose. So what is this now? And you call this a family. Let me laugh. Let me laugh until i cry. All you do is lie back and watch korean show, and complain you have a lot to do. What. The. Hell. Screaming at us, talking shit, talking nonsense. This applies to another person too. Everything must be lined out clearly. So she carries this attitude of, this is your thing, so you do it. You drop your thing, so you picked it up.

Okay. Shant rant anymore. Just so sick of this whole damn thing. Sentosa will be a get away. I know it will be. Anyway, i think aft a while, i'll be sorry i even typed tht. I'll be regretting and i'll just say forget it la, small thing. Oh well. I cant seem to maintain anger, for tht long. Which is good(: Lala im good at consoling myself. haha too used to it i guess. Hmm white bags :DDDDD Until i find a bag of a diff colour tht fascinates me, i'll just continue liking white bags. Haha!

Lines of Words, Written in Hands of Sweetness
Sketches of Photos, Drawn with Colourful Hues of Joy
Details of Memories, Kept in One Heart Joined by Two.
With love.

I just planned the things i have to do for the whole of June. Whoa it sure is packed. I have a whole list of never ending stuff. And it's damn no life. Everyday must do work, or else i can say bye bye to my grades and wht not already. Been skipping lessons, especially physics and chem. I'm like dead already at these 2 subjects. But anyway yeah, i dont think i can complete, and i dont think i'll be so on for everyday. Surely there will be one day I want to just relax and wht not and blahblah. But its not just work i have to bother with. i have many other things to do as well, and no, i don't consider going out as one the the other things. Thats just another additional thing. Oh man do i even make senseeee. Bah. Whatever. Rachel is dumb. Eva's dumber because she finished the first maths self study module annnnd worksheet. She good. I wnat to help her bang the wall. Haha. Ah well, rachel rachel rachel, you btr stop procrastinating.

Staying at home is boring boring boring. Afternoon was btr, at least i was out. Oh well, i know wht you are doing, so you can jolly well stop interfering. It's kind of irritating and i guess this is where you should stop. Then again, i won't stoop so low as to sneak around ppl's businesses. I'll do it my own way, just you wait. I'll be doing smth that i shall be proud of myself. And i think she thinks im dumb and all, okay well i was just careless. Hahaaaaa, let's hope it'll work and i can say im brilliant :D

You are The Love.

Dreamy Swirls Of Love. ♥ says:
im the rocker one
you loser

tassiewombad@yahoo.com says:
whatever
WHOSE THE ONE WHO NEVER EVER ICE SKATED ALL 16 YEARS OF HER LIFE?!?!!

Dreamy Swirls Of Love. ♥ says:
THANKS THANKS

tassiewombad@yahoo.com says:
AND THEN WHOSE THE ONE WHO 1ST SKATED AT THE AGE OF 5???

Dreamy Swirls Of Love. ♥ says:
SO NICE OF YOU
ANNAh
YOU LA
YOU LAAAAA

tassiewombad@yahoo.com says:
:D:D:D
SUCKER! :)


Rahhhh, i do not like stupid ling ling. Haha FINE!!! I shall ice-skate by this month! Learn how to and everything! Yay somebody can go with me ;D Hmm went east coast today! Yay! With jiale jiaqi eva and jasmine. i went rollerblading with jasmine first, fell a few times, in a short period, hahaha dno wht happened. Must be due to the distraction but stupid jiale and eva seah. Haha! Now my butt-thigh area got quite a big patch of wound, or whtever you call tht. Sadddd. But yay rollerblading still very fun. Got some stupid cyclists, nth also ring behind me, so irritating, then how am i suppose to move man!! Rah! Hahah Jiale and Eva cycled off themselves, then Jiaqi stayed with us for awhile before giving up and cycled off, and then she disappeared! Hahah funny, we took only 4 photos. pathetic man. W/o jiaqi smmore ): And stupid wingyau!!!! Then went cycling. yay fun fun, cycled al the way till dno where, then all the way back and further down. So fun! New Zealand Natural Sorbets are the bestttttt! Omgosh so nice lah, love the mango and berryfruit! Wheeeeee! I didnt fall while cycling! Lalallalalalla. Thats a feat man. Haha! But still i fell before tht, so i guess :/ Tired tired. Wanted to run there too, good weather! But actually, i didnt felt like runign aft cycling so yeah ;D Had company ma. Its a happpy happy day overall! Tralala.

SWINGS ARE THE BESTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!
Hee swam today! Lala actually there arent any ppl, which is quite rare, cuz normally there will be abt 3 or 4 ppl, which will be considered alot! Vast difference k, cuz the 3 or 4 ppl will tak eup my space! Hmph! Okay i need to reaaaally swim now, this urge to swim. I wannnnt. Laps are fun :D But today was more than fun, its damn fun, and funny. Haha the goggles thing. I want to laugh. Fun! This little girl so cute(:
UNCLE DANNNNNNNNNNNNNN! ;DDDDD Hello uncle! ;DD Im still the ever youthful jie jie manzxzxzxzxz. Haha i can imagine stefanie rolling her eyes now. oh well! I dont liek my dentist cuz hes so un-gentle and so :/. Urgh my teeeeeeeeeeeeeeeth ); poor teeth. Now i look like some saliva dropping weirdo. Thanks thanks. I want to skip this to my retainers stage! Haha anyw. Sabbaticals are so fun, NOT! Only the breaks in between. Or else i sit on the chair, and try to blend in with it. And i rot i stone i die on it. So siannnnn. Oh my gosh can dieeeeee. Financial Literacy for Math is the worst. But luckily got lili and jessie to pei wo. We talked a bit, okay quite a lot, during the breaks. Haha talking abt sec 1 till now. Talk abt changes. Talk abt current situation. Lala, im so abstract. I hate holidays for one major thing - the mountain of hmwork tht seem like i can nvr complte within this month. Math and chiense both took up huge portions. And im like dumb, i need to cathc up on other topics. Been sleeping in chem and physics lesson. Urgh im so a not science person, why am i in a triple science class??!!? WHATS MY PURPOSE IN LIFE?!?!?! HAHAHAHA. But really man. No purpose, no goal. Just driftin in with the crowd, not trying to do my best. Hmm is that what i really want? But then again, i cant try too hard, try harder and i'll fall. Oh gosh, i suck.

Sentosa with Pri School Mates! Woohoo can't wait. Yay june june! :D Jack quickly go plan and organise, i lazy. Haha. Wheee shall love it, tralala. Hmm! Must plan must plan! What shall we doooooo. Anyway! Made of Honour is not bad, considering the other shitty movies they have now, i think its quite sweet how the girl can actually changed this guy to a whole new person, for the btr of course(: And and and that the guy finally realizes the love of his life was there all along, right beside him(: They kept drinking starbucks and eating cake in the movie!!! Oh my gosh, now im craving for starbucks and cake toooooo. Rah, anyw swensens ice cream is just so so. My Haagen Dazs, my Ben&Jerry's, my island creamery!!! Okay i dont have temptation to eat ice cream now anyw. Haha, except Macs ice cream!! Woohoo Cheap is Gooooood. Ahem.
Talking to Dannnnn :D;D;D is a rly good thing. Because in a way we are in the same plight, for many things, and we can relate better. I think its quite cool that we have a lot in common. Woohoo we are retarded and crazy ppl who are sophisticatedddd. Haha im mad. But yeah, i come to realise alot of things, whee all the enlightenment i get abt myself, which i dont really bother to know before, and then realised it is quite true aft they were pointed out. And the stuff abt others too. I guess 3's rly a crowd, and thus i realised(again), its rly hard when you have a group of odd number of ppl, because there will always be this person who get left out, unknowingly. Yeah, and we'll all get hurt smhow, just especially in a group of 3. So i guess talking out really helps, everythign small things i've realised but i just left it there, not infering much until when you tell someone, you will then see for yourself that you've been ignorantly ignoring wht you cld have concluded long ago abt whtever stuff or person. Um, just like i realised today only as i say the stuff out, that all along we cld nvr get together well, as a group. We are, well were close, but we can nvr exist together. Which is a sad fact, but now it doesnt bother me as much as last time alrdy. Because! I have btr things to think about :DDDDDDD Lala! Shall end off!


My brother's so cute la! Hes like trying to sit on 3 chairs but he ended sitting on one cuz duh, you cant sit on 3 chairs unless you have a rly huge butt. Yeah so funny, i was watching him. Hes really like a small kid smtimes(:





Hi love.

Sometimes the simplest things bring out the ugliest side of people.

Haha! Wheee did the craziest thing ytd! We are like really crazy people! Meant to beeeeee (: Its exciting and risky but so fun! Lalala. We are so retarded. Crazy people do crazy things. But it was the best everrrrr. It felt liek adrenaline rush. Never knew how you can talk without actualyl talking, but yeah finally knew the meaning today. :D
I cant wait for school tmr. Haaaaaa. Like real. hate sabbaticals and i hope they rot and die. Im going mad. I dont like mineee, its boring. Its like having english and maths lesson. NOOOOOOOOOOOOO): I want my icecream! Suddenly felt like eating Haagen Dazz Icecream today, which is like weird. Suddenly felt like eating alot of things, but wasnt hungry. just that craving ;/ Hmm, saw this dress at Esprit today! It's pretty and so is the price, a hundred plus, crazy. But ah well, i reckon it wont look gd on me anyw, who knows. My mum was like, you go out to the streets can find smth liek tht easily for just 20-30 bucks. Might be true. Haha clothes hunt! Im on a shopping mood! Whee cant wait for the Great Singapore Sales!

Escape into the night, away from the crowds, fairytale getawayyy.

Negative feelings are unhealthy - again.

& i will not like this stinging feeling take over me. I will not let it get me down again. I will not be silly again. I will not be taken in again. I will not try anymore. I will not let myself get backstabbed again. I will not get affected. I will be happy and pretend nothing's happening. I will be ignorant. I will not be brought down by intefering ppl. So why do i feel its already happening to me now?
Perhaps im thinking too much.

Negative feelings are really unhealthy.
Skipping is fun! Skip skip skip! I skipped ytd! And now my knee got a bruise. Haha so funny. Stood too close i guess. Haha. Wheee. Double skipping's fun. Triple's one too! Hmm i want skip more. Skipping makes ppl grow taller. Lala.
Borders or Kinokuniya? Hmmm. I want books. Jodi Picoult!!! Haha she appeared in today's Life. okay i underestimated her size, hahaha. But yeah she can write! Her twists are so good k. I feel liek buying a whole series of her books. I want to read The Tenth Circle!! The pact's plot doesnt seem to move me. Hmm i wonder wht other books are there? Yeah so bascially. I seem to want books. I want a bag. I want a pair of shoes. I want a pencil case!! Hahah okay i want to watch MadeofHonour! Seems nice! And i've stopped doing quizzes. Even though i have loads more at my hands. Like 30 plus. But i dont need them alrdy lah. Its kinda dumb. I might as well blog proper. Then it'll look nicer. Quizzes are kind of bo liao. Hee.
I feel baddddd. I think im dumb. Always not trying hard enough. So question is, am i dumb or am i dumb. Yeah, once dumb always dumb. Dumb already nvm, still dont want to try hard enough. Oh gosh, sorry ): I feel bad. Like really bad. Must try to make my feelings more subtle. If i feel really dead and bored, i shldnt like express it in my voice. It's so mean. Okay i shldnt even feel taht way. Its unfair. Yeah loads of apologies! Sorry!

Woohoo! Venezia's sorbet-like yogurt icecream is the bestttttttttttt. Its not very ex too! Whee i like i like! I like lying under the sun, lying on the track. I like skipping! Fun fun even though i have a tendency to laughhhhhh. I love exchanging shoes and i love the sweattttttt. Yay! Suddenly i appreciate the sun more.
Got freaked out by this uncle at my bus stop. He is so damn scary. Hes like old and rly fat and all of the sudden, realization of him standing beside me, indirectly:p, dawn upon me. He was whistling, and when i turned to look at him, cuz he refused to move away, he was like looking at me back damn scarily, like the pervertic look. Oh my gosh la. I swear hes a paedophile. And aft tht he didnt want to move away, it was just so :/ And i looked at him again which he gave me the same expression, like this pervertic smile and gaze in his eyes. Urgh cannot stand it. Gross old uncle. Gah.
Gonna hate monday. Gonna hate the weekends. Loads of stuff to do - again. Shan't rant abt it. Haha stupid yueling and rui sian. Their crap letter-.- So full of crap, i was like oh my gosh, they win liao. Haha. I dont want to reply ))))): School sucks. Sabbaticals suck. Fullstoppppp, as quoted from eva.

Pictures!

Haha classic!



Wahhhhhhhh. Im feeling the heat. Im retarded, im hopeless but im happy:D



Sorbets are love!



Pretty cloudish sky! Love my photographing skills(:


Coveting for this love, this magic, this chemistry.

Haven't been blogging for quite some time. Haha i just have so many to say but when i face the computer, my brain drains away. In sweetness and love, i think i'd jsut rather keep things close to my heart, remembering and penning it down might actually be the best way to reminisce such perfect memories with the perfect one. It's been quite a blast these days. From choc fondue, to strum/sing song dedication, to pencil case shopping to giving up and settle on eating instead. Hahahaa tons of fun in merely a few hours. Hmm I really appreciate everythingggg, every single thought and effort and MONEY (ahem) spent. Haha i know someone's goign to go, aiyahhhhhhh money not impt la. Blahblahblah, shall not listen. Im like goign to make a mental note of it, and just return them, in one way or another!
School was boring, sian, and i hardly talked as much in school, or uh no. I just listen more which is amazing manzxzxzxz. But yeah, it kind of died off today. Haha! NYSL meeting during lunch. Wahpiang, some rly ncie teacher make a really nice remark on PSLs. Hah i shan't comment, but her remarks really pisses me off. Even the others and teacher including was like pissed. Its so irritating, like oh please, councillors cant do everything, and you cant say they are efficient either. Jiale, Lili and Jas can back me up on this. They cant possible take over everything, and i dno, the proposals they give us was quite um not up to standard. Which led me to think, has the standard dropped or smth in the quality of our student leaders in general? Even PSL so as to say. But yeah back to my point, we'll show tht teacher. Show her PSL's goign to make it the bestest ever grad night, and we'll make do with what we have, make do with the number of ppl coming. If she can find a gooood, classy hotel that the sec fours actually want, plus its cheaper than Marriott, then fine we'll hand over Grad night over to them. But if not, leave it to us, and we'll show you whats the real meaning of 'good'. Hahaha okay. Did puppetry for the childcare centres ytd and today. It was a happy thign because the kids are sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo CUTEEEE!!!! OH my gosh! Damn cute, i totally degraded myself to their level. Thanks thanks. And jasmine i did not go whtever sound i made ytd!!! BUt they are jsut so cute! but i didnt quite get the hang of it ytd, so jasmine did alot of the talking, i was a bit stony, probably a bit sleepy. But ytd kids were cuter, even though they aint as smart or responsive as today. They were crawling over my lap, getting closer to us, and they lk like they are in push up positions, damn funny. Today's kids are damn cute too actually, not as cute as ytd's but they are smart!!! Like so smart, and they were like 'i like your story' and 'its good'. Woohoo, lovely kids. Love it when they wave to me, smile at me, and call me jie jie! Its a good feeling.
Okay, im wondering why ppl clubs/smokes. Im wondering why ppl drinks and do one night stands. I seriously dont understand. Smoking kills your lungs, shortens your lifespan, clubbing and drinking just waste your life away as you spend your time on things like this, which is so whtever. One night stands are the worse, its such an impure and ew-ish thing to do. Gosh, whts wrong with the world? Whts wrong with ppl who are so immature and think all this is plain cool when its so obviously not -.- Whts wrong with these ppl? Dont they haev a heart for their parents who rly love them? Ah well, im just being random. My mind works rly weirdly sometimes. Till then.

If there's a word greater than love, it'll be you.

Mondays are not nice. Haha ran in the morning, suddenly felt like running more today, so i went for 2 more rounds aft running with wingyau. PE!!! Last module already. So sad, i love Ms Chue! Shes so nice to us!!!! And and and she bakes choc almond muffin for our class. So cool!! Had fun during soccer today, played a roughly proper game. Haha whee we won 3-1! ;D i scored the first goal! Second goal own goal, hahah that one damn funny, i was just watching the crowd of ppl's legs kicking frantically right in front of the goal, then it just went in -.- Third one was by lili! Whee! Haha basically, the ball was hogged by mass of people kicking the ball wildly. Ah well, we need a bigger field.
Watched Princess Monoke during lang arts. Urgh she keept pausing and pausing!!!! The whole lot of us behind was like so irritated by tht k. But anyw, it was not bad. Want watch more! Brain went deadd during math. Hhaha sucks, i conclude eva is most efficient when there are sweets or food given as rewards for work done. So next time we all knw wht to do to make her work for us :DDDDD And i listneed during chem today, wah, first time in my 2 years i listened to susan chew. Hahah, ah well. Maybe cuz she didnt digress as much today. Hmm sleepy):

Deleted.

Ah well, these few days. Angsty. Frustration. Irritation. I feel like swimming now. At night, thats the best. They shld have a 24hr pool. Why doesnt singapore has tht?

Swim swim swim! Hahah 30 laps gone. Thanks thanks ;D But fun fun, haha doesnt matter actually. Because as time is spent wisely and more meaningfully, that wld be even better! Wheee dumb uncleeee, so gross, keep blowing his nose right into the water. What the shit. Haha people these days. Woohooooooo i want go jurong east and play! Havent been there for supeeeeer long! I want use the float too! Haha i rmb i use to stand on it, sit on it, do all sorts of stupid things with it. Heeeeeeeh, i want to piggyback in the water! Cuz i can carry ppl even if they are heavier than me. Lalalaaaa! :D Fun fun. Wheeeeeeeee. I want cycling too! I want watch midnight movies! I want to bake. I want to watch sunrise. I want no school but loads of play ;D I want to run i want play tennis i want play volleyball i want to go to the beach i want more timeeeeeeee.
People are cowards, or rather they are ppl who sneak arnd, poking into ppl's business, trying to know more. Question is, whats the purpose? I live the way i want. Cowardly actions, for you read and you dont even as much as tag. Haha what a joke.

Today is a pissing day.
School was fine. The bus driver was so not fine. I really detest bus drivers like him, so damn rigid, and purposely make life hard for students. Its like my dno how many encounter with such drivers. Seriously whts their problem with students having to pay adult fare when they are obviously a student?!?!? Like of course we have to pay using coins if we forget to bring our ez link card right, still stupidly ask us to show them our cards to PROVE we are students -.- No brains. They just want to eat more money. Then second one is this stupid ah neh. Seriously, which rule in her shop says tht ppl who are above 13 cnt TOUCH or TRY OUT the games or toys or whtever you call tht. So if parents were to buy for their kids they cnt try it out too? Dumb shit. Shes jsut not happy that we are what, using up the battery for tht toy? -.- Crap, no wonder no business. Lousy. Eh thirdly, the stupid island creamery woman. Bitchy. Got nice legs got nice bod got nice face. But the face dont want to make use of it properly, give that look, haha i shall not use any not nice words, but shes like so whatever man. Make a bit of noise will die ah, she nvr spill water before ah. Wahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. And i cannot stand it. Why dont people jsut leave me alone. Im happy with my life, stop bugging or poking your nose into my business. If you dont like what you are seeing, then dont go facebook, dont come my blog, dont go anywhere that i put my stuff in. Even if its curiosity, and thats to put it in a good way, then dont talk abt it, do you have to talk abt it, tell other ppl, spread the news and rumours that you saw me somewhere with my bf, or that wht i blogged and blah and all tht crap? Hello. Dont you have smthing else better to do? If you cant stand the pictures, then so be it, you cant stand the words and entries and comments, then so be it. Theres no need to share abt my life. Hah more like gossip but whtever. I shld have been used to it since sec 1. But still cant stand it. I knw i use to gossip, alot too. But now i jsut cut down alot, because i cant be bothered to. Maybe its time for the people out there to start giving tht basic respect to everyone, because as much as you may not like them, maybe you shldnt judge too quickly. Whats more you cant base yoru judgement on one aspect of her life. Oh well. Whatever. I dont care already.
Hmm on a lighter note, im going swimming tmr. Hah, i love swimming, because it make syou forget everything. I love the cooling water that brushes past my face, the feeling of yourself immersing in the water, cool and refreshing feeling. And now i sound like im advertising for some swimming commercial. (:

Plunged into this fantasy; etched into this entrapment; sketched into this sweetness; carved into this love.

Had the most retarded conversation with my junior.

tassiewombad@yahoo.com says:
oh reeally????
YES U ARE GIRLY! :D

Bestie. Confidante. Lover. ♥ ELEVEN! says:
I DEMAND AN EXPLANATION! (:

tassiewombad@yahoo.com says:
what explanation?
*innocent innocent*

Bestie. Confidante. Lover. ♥ ELEVEN! says:
-.- hahhaha explain why you make tht statement of me being girly when its apparent im not

tassiewombad@yahoo.com says:
ahahahaa wait
i consult rs
erm... our explanantion:
1)cos u tink u r not!
2)bcos u have bf?? hahha
3)cos u have long hair :D
4) cos ur sec4s r mature and lovely young LADIES!!! :D
5) do u wear skirts other then sch skirts??

Bestie. Confidante. Lover. ♥ ELEVEN! says:
hahahahah your firsst reason doesnt even make sense. i
1) i think im not girly therefore i am girly? Uh no sense here please.
2) Having a bf doesnt make me girly
3) Lili has long hair does tht make her girly? NO;D
4) Does tht mean every sec 4 is girly then? NO!
5) Thats a question plus assumption, not even a reason. So you cannot suport your statement that im girly. Okay i shall confess yes i do wear other skirts but so do other gilrs. That doesnt make them girly(:

tassiewombad@yahoo.com says:
U R GIRLY!
admit it! :D

Bestie. Confidante. Lover. ♥ ELEVEN! says:
hahahaha you cannot even support yoru statement!!?!?!??!!?!?!
anyhow only!
hahaha
im not girly!!!

tassiewombad@yahoo.com says:
1) that was a crapy explanation given by rs

Bestie. Confidante. Lover. ♥ ELEVEN! says:
im just not tomboyish

tassiewombad@yahoo.com says:
2)so ur r gays???
haha:P
3)lilis hair can be considered short
so...those OTER GIRLS r girly too! :D

Bestie. Confidante. Lover. ♥ ELEVEN! says:
that just means every other girl is girly alrdy!

tassiewombad@yahoo.com says:
so u r gay! :D
haha
with dan
:))

Bestie. Confidante. Lover. ♥ ELEVEN! says:
yep! im happy with dan
and im goin to paste this conver on my blog man just you wait

tassiewombad@yahoo.com says:
ok fine!
wait
dun paste yet
let me say a few more things :D
rs wants to add sth too! :D
hmmm
lemme c
lets tok some nice stuff!
RACHIE!
is a nice girly gal
who has nice girly frens!
haha
rachie
rachie
rachie
oh man

Bestie. Confidante. Lover. ♥ ELEVEN! says:
haha one day im goign to whack you for calling me rachie. dont you dare call me tht in real life.

tassiewombad@yahoo.com says:
im obssessed with this word! :D
lols

Bestie. Confidante. Lover. ♥ ELEVEN! says:
?!?!?!?!

tassiewombad@yahoo.com says:
but i like it!
rachie ! :))

tassiewombad@yahoo.com says:
wait
the com hanged jus now
i wanted to say sth
BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYESBUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYESBUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES
BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYESBUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYESBUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES BUHBYES

This Undeniable Chemistry. ♥ ELEVEN! says:
-.-
YOUSUCK

tassiewombad@yahoo.com says:
hahah
oh whatever!
be sure to post this on ur blog! :D
i wanna ur frens to c! :D

This Undeniable Chemistry. ♥ ELEVEN! says:
you need a whack on your butt

tassiewombad@yahoo.com says:
what a NICE junior i am!

HAHAHAHA OH MY GOSH. Thanks thanks. Shes obsessed over the word rachie. Haaaaa i wonder if im supposed to be honoured. :D Whee new blogskin. I finally got down to doing it. Even though i have tons to do but just suddnly felt like doing it. Random, as always.

Ikea's hotdogs are loveeeeeeeee, especially when you eat them with a company ;DDDDD Lalalala. And the ice cream! Hee! Ikea's fun ikea's fun! Its been a gazillion years since i last stepped in there. And frankly speaking, i nvr have had really walked through ikea and look at the stuff there before. Uh hmm pathetic but haha its nvr too late! Had a superbly fun time walking around and doing rly retarded stuff. Tralalala, took nice nice and artistic photos. Thanks to me lah, hahahaha, im like gooooood. Okay going high alrdy :p shall go ikea sometime soon! Again! Weddings today were okay, my voice only rly warmed up at the second one, which sucks cuz the first one i had more to sing. Gahhh stupid voice): Money money anyway! Hahah must save money ;D Or else later no money alrdy. Wanted to post pictures, but then again forget it. Sadly i forgot to take pictures of the beloved hotdogs! Memories!

Haha combined sports meet on wednesday. It was boring, the only attraction of the day was the free milo! Cheapo people!



The hwachong guys are so ungentlemanly, they were pushing their way in.Gdness damn kiasu, then i cldnt stand it and i was like 'Eh hello gentleman la" There were less movement from them aft tht but they were still liek some auntie lah -.- Haha funny funny. Even though i thickskinnedly take 2 cups for myself, at least i not so kiasu! HAHAH! Eh 2 cups only whtttttt, understandable, it was very hot ;DDD Heheheh! And the only climax for the day was the interschool teachers race! HAHA NANYANG WON AGAIN!!!! LALALA! Go us! We were like so far ahead of the other teams, team a and b of nanyang won the first and third placings. the other teams as and bs of the other schs were like hahaha ah well. We rock!!! but we lost the novelty race for the first time in dno how many years, sadly. Hmmm.


More pictures!




Haha squashed brownie! It doesnt look gross la!!!! It looks niceeee ;DDD And delicious! ;DDD And dumb pictures! Look so funny! ;DDD Okay i shall be done with my :DDD! Whee!

Oh man, today's weathewr worse than yesterday. Super super super blistering hot. Damn sad. I was basically sweating the whole day. Hahah training hwachong is -.- Luckily i brought my skipping rope! Wheee skipped with wingyau first, keep bursting into laughter. we havent broke the 30 record yet! Then proceedded to play jump rope among me wy and qianwen. Fun fun fun! Hahah yay i love jumping in and turning around. We even sang the teddy bear song lah. Cuz its sort of like a kid game when you skipped on the rope. Okay it goes like this,' Teddy bear teddy bear turn around, teddy bear teddy bear touch the ground, teddy bear teddy bear go to sleep..." OKay and then we dont knw wht else happen. So when i finished all 3 tasks, as in literally while still skipping, i dont knw wht to do, then we just laughed.Hahah we just keep laughing only. Wheee fun fun, very fun to touch the ground amidst skipping ;D OKay then huiying shouted tht it was 5, and we just quickly rushed off like idiots, for the free ice cream cone at ben and jerry! Hahah we are all cheapo people. Ah welllllllll. So uh i went to vivo to get my free cone! Wahaha the long queue, and the irritating hot temperature outside. But the ice cream was so niceeeeeeee. Yay! But i guess the main point wasnt the icecream! HAHAHAH. It was um smth else. Of course. I rly dont like tht irrtating taxi driver. Some dumb face tht lks like a cheat and is a cheat! i seriously think he come act stupid, say he dno wheres telok blangah crescent, pretended to ask us whether its turn right or left, then aft a supposedly 'wrong turn', he suddenly was enlightened and drove himself to my house. Wht the hell. Sucker lah. Act stupid just to earn more money, pathetic. Seriously. Hahah hmph! Okay whtever. Tmr is csm -.- Boring sian boring sian urgh. I want to pon. But cannot pon. More sian. I dont like csm lah. No point. Only interesting part is the teachers relay race. Woohoo go nanyang! Win it again! For the dno how many consecutive years alrdy hahahahhahahahaaaaa. Go go go!

Is it just me or is the weather intolerably hot these days?! Especially today, omgoshhhhhhhhhh, i was sweating and sweating and sweating. Ew. I came out of an air conditioned place and soon later i felt damn hot. At night somemore. Tsk! Evil sweat glands. Hahha! Yay im happy happy! This week's been goooooood. Even though its slack but its good and fun and eventful and meaningful and of significance! Went jiale's house ytd. Was concentrating but haha started disturbing people. Its Eva's fault!!! When she came, i started to be distracted k. Hahahaaaaaaa, i still hate jiale's house for being so hugeeeeeeeee. Had to walk her 1.2km out of he rhouse to the bus stop, then a lot of indian workers and foreign workers, quite scary cuz a few of them looked at me. Stupid wingyau! She left me alone. So i got quite freaked out and i called jiale :DDD WEnt amk hub! More ;DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD Stayed at Macs almost the entire time, getting distracted quite easily. Haha! Today was quite cool, skipped the grand copthorne trip, which was lucky for me cuz apparently the lightings are horrid, the ambience is bad, the price was high. Marriot was so much better! I thought it was a nice place, mayeb because the alvin smth smth who was the person in charge was rly nice. Haha funny funny, i was a few mins late, so when i rushed in, he looked at me and was like, are you a student? And he only gave his namecard to me. Wahahahaha. but yeah le i think hes a very resposible and efficient person. I liek to work with nice people, so i think more or less marriot. The location's not bad too. So er lets jsut hope the outcome of the sec 4 assembly will be marriot! Propaganda, i'm so goign to promote marriot. Not bias k! But because its really good, its like we witnessed it, damn credible lah. Hahha who am i kidding! Jas and I even went to video the toilet, hahaha damn sua ku man. Hmm then it ended earlier than expected, so i rushed off mrt-ed, bought starbucks, figured my way around, sweating again -.-, bus-ed, happy happy happy, bus-ed back and ate. Hahahah woohoooooooooooooooooooooooooo. Today was not bad, i love seeing smiles. like seriously, it makes me happy.
AND NO QIANWEN, I REFUSE TO BRING MY BELOVED TIGGER TO SCHOOL! YOU AND JAS WILL JUST MOLEST IT!!! JIALE TOO!! AND WINGYAU AND EVA WILL MUTATE IT! HAHA EVIL POKS :D

Smallest things can be the sweetest.
Last moments of sweet sixteen spent with someone special. Heh! :p Hahha,today recess, i was just walking normally with wingyau and qianwen, then suddenly i saw this candle thing at the newspapers area there. And wingyau just took my hand and ran towards there, leaving me no time to think what was happnening. Haha tht sounds wrong but yeah you get the idea. Then i realised it was a bday cake, for me! Fruit cake, yay nice change from chocolate. Heheh thank you people! Then lunch i was at the library, i sound like some geek please. Then aft the gay interclass math and science quiz, i went back class and realised there were cookies and choc from jodiefoooooooooo. That dumdum girl, hahaha! Why is she always so nice to me and the others?!! Tsk! She was damn funny during assembly, her expression and tone. haha think she grew more outspoken, because i rmb sec 2 tht time she really quiet until ... Haha ;DDDDD Anyway her cookies were rly nice! Wheee cant wait for gathering, havent talk to tht retarded clique for ages. Think we grew quite apart. And then melwee's letter! Omgosh la, i thought she forgotten, hehehe. her letter so cute. Thank you thank you thank you!! HIlton's cheesecake rly nice too! Heheh! My mum was like, stop eating so much cheesecake, very fattening. Then i was like -.- Fineeeee i alrdy ate alot, haha like almost half of the cake!!! Fatssssss, i shall go burn them off er soon. Thanks to someone lah, refused to share it with me ): Funny how it felt more like my bday than ytd, as in DURING schooltime. Yep! I dont feel like blogging anymore. Tired!

HAPPYHAPPYHAPPY GIRL(:
Overwhelmed, dumbfounded, speechless. All evil plotting revealed:D

Yesterday i stayed up until my bday arrives, but it didnt felt like my bday, even though i got bombarded with sms email and call altogether ;D That was enough to make me smile like crazy already. Then i woke up this morning feeling like its just another day. Reached school 5 minutes later, slowly walked to my class and then i saw this figure. And i thought i was dreaming. Then i took a closer look and then i just stopped and stare and i jsut went omgosh. My whole mind went blank seriously. I think my jaws dropped alot, i was so so so so so shocked. Seriously, i rly thought i was dreaming or smth. Like is this really happening? Actually alot of questions like why he came, how he came, why is he there just flashed past my mind, but they were all replaced by my sheer shock-ness in me. I dont knw wht else to say, except you suck you suck you suck. Screaming and smiling. Sadly i couldnt do anything else, because Dan happily brought his frnd along. And i didnt want her to wait too long, im nice i know ;D So he has to go quite soon. Leaving me alone in my shocked mode still, smiling away in class, not being able to pay attention AT ALL. The tigger and eeyore was so cute!!!! The first thing cassy did was taking out their clothes. Haha thanks. I was hugging the two of them almost the whole of the day during lessons, smiling to myself, looking completely lovestruck and silly i know, but i couldnt care less. The cards were literally filled with honey! And i was furiously taking out all the cards and reading, each card i read, i die once. Also because i want to reach the last, or rather second last card as soon as possible. Curiosity! Okay and then aft the bball match, town-ed, and realised how sua ku we are at posing for pictures. Haha! thennnnnnn, ate ice cream! I want to pay next time, aft realising how much was spent on me towards the end -.- Urgh! Hmm went forum toys r us! Fun fun, stupid toys and gadgets kids have these days. And we sat on merry go round. Omgosh i find it very fun! It makes me feel like a child again, happy feeling(: Then went to Giraffe! The palce where evil plotting really starts. I want to fast forward everything and just say tht the evil plotting is really really REALLY evil! Shock beyond words, eyes shining in the dark, mind filled with nothing but more blankess, heart feels with disbelief. Is today really my bday? haha omgosh. Last card finally got delivered. And also an extra smth, which i didnt expect at all. Yep i was so happy, smth within me just triggers smth else out of me :D Haha only Dan understands ;D Yeah thanks to him, my bday is so memorable, thanks to him, my bday is made the sweetest and most amazing and best ever spent, thanks to him, i can forget and forgo the small bit of disappointment that some impt frnds forgot my bday. Yeah. even though just having his wishes are impt enough alrdy, sometimes it kind of hurts a little when your best of frnds dont even remember, or when some frnds knw its your bday but they dont wish you anything. I think acquaintences rmb even better. Haha, thanks to Dan again, he gave me my first bday cake and sang me first bday song. Actually he was the only one, so yeah whicih makes all the difference! Smiles smiles smile and more smiles. More pleasant surprises, more sweet shocks. The whole day was just filled with blank minds and shocked feelings and not to forget, sweetness overflow in my heart. YAY!!!!! :D I surprised myself even, because im nota person who ___ so easily, and yet i ___, and i was like oh my gosh whts wrong with me when i ____. Haha oh well love gives you the strangest feelings and actions unexplainable unpredictable!
Okay before anyone say i zhong se qing you, which i actually uh haha nvm, yep i;ve to thank jiale,wingyau,eva,jiaqi,jasmine,qianwen for the present they gave! Tee and memo pads! Hahah stupid wingyau! Purposely buy the memo pads cuz i love fruits and orange juice in particular. And the card is so retarded! Hahaaaa nvm, im still the most goodlooking, intelligent and witty people in the whole world!!! Tadah! Plus it was filled with jasmine's beloved sheep, shes rly goign to plant sheeps in my life to make me like them -.- Hahah funny. Kaiyu's candle/soap thingthing and funny card ;D Yay shes nice ;D And jodie's cookies which i couldnt collect from her haha, another rly nice person ;D Thank you to other people who wished me happybday(: thank you for remembering at least ;D okay im being retarded, i've :D for many things alrdy, ahaha im damn happy! For whtever happens today, esp BEFORE&AFTER SCHOOL. Poof!

As love rushes through my head, all that wells up in my eyes are tears of joy and sweetness. And love shall continue forevermore. This sweetness and ecstasy that comes to me, my heart is where i'll keep.

In school now blogging because of the lack of internet connection the past few days. Dumb wireless networks. Dumb pc ): Oh welllll. Anyway, had the most retarded conversation with wingyau on friday! HAHA hilarious. From chem lesson all the way when we reached SP. We were like, eh no SHEEEEEE was like very childish, hahahah funny la. I realised i always talk rubbish when chem lesson starts, maybe thats why i nvr scores for chemistry even though i dont really mind reading chemistry. HEEEEEEE. Weekends were weird, i did my work but it feels like i nvr do anything. Maybe because there are many things stil weighing on my mind. Like the sias and seminar and the assignments. Oh man im constantly whining and complaining, i cnt stand myself alrdy. Hhahaha but seriously, i still have to call that dumb Dell operator or singtel or whtever to fix my internet connection ): that will take like an hour. Goodie -.-
Hmm whenever i thought of things to blog, i cannot rmb when i really am blogging like now. Everything just whoosh and fly away. The only reason why im still blogging right now, even though theres no content no nothing to blog is because the keyboard very fun to type!!!! The sound the feel, hahah omgosh im going crazy. Lalallalalala yay yay yay fun fun fun. I like this keyboard. Maybe i shld blog here early in the morning everyday wahahah. Whee class breakfast's on friday! Cassy happily suggested that rachel can do the chocolate truffles made last year. Funny funny. Choc truffles as in the cheapo kind. Hahah using cornflakes and all. And i insisted that i want to make jelly because its lying in the cupboard for ages and i wouldnt do it unless theres an occasion. Soooo even though the class wasnt rly enthusiastic abt it, thanks ah, i shall still do it. Woohoo busy thursday :D Tadah im currently a happy girl, the last day of being a 15! Wahah! Point is, er theres no point. Eva must get well soon! I shall give her my bday luck for tmr's match and her ankle, hopefully the other team will let them win la huh. Best situation ;DDD And eva wont strain her ankle! Go go go!

Heart-filled misses.

Hula hoops! Haha random i know. I feel like buying one now and play. Because i was reminded of the hula hoops at toys r us the other day. Hmm, i rmbed how i couldnt do it, but my sister could. So i keep trying and practised until i could! And now she cant! WAHAHAHA. Heheh im evil. Crazy, ran abt 3++ km without knowing. Near 4? when its supposed to be only 2+ km. Thanks la thanks. Haha it was okay la, jsut tht if i knew, i would have ran with a slower pace. Dumdummmmmmmmmmmmmmm :D Whee next tuesday alot of thigns are happening! Its earth day! Haha forgt wht events jasmine has planned for green club, but theres Eva and Cassy basketball match! Fun fun fun. its so cool because ourmugger class finally go out together to 'have fun', well sort of, seeing tht we only go out as a class for cip or for ffair, and never to support cca matches and all. PLUS ITS THE FINALS!!! I was telling eva how excited i am for her. really. Happy too! cuz its like the last year for her and cassy, and they got into the finals for the first time in dno hwo many years. Hahah exciting maaaaaa! I hope they win! i want them to win, but of course no stress there. HAAAAAAAAAA :D Hmm and i dno if i shld be excited for this evil planning thing thts been going on for as long as i rmb. Or shld i be scared. And whyyyyyyyyyyyyy am i making my mind so confused. Dreams are dreams, illusions are illusions. Hahah funny ah. Shall just take whtever comes. Do i have a choice? :p Lalala, i repeat, i do not like cockroaches, lizards, any creepy crawlies annnnnnnd frogs. Blah.
I shall figure out how to use flash soon, and do tht damn chem quiz get it over and done with and be free of it. I cant wait for next friday. Then the projects will be more or less dealt with. Hmm but theres still bio to go. And many hmwork. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. I want pull my hair out. Urgh. Plus the fact im not as smart as the rest, who dont have to self study so much at home. Or mabe i just have lousy time managament skills. Haha whtever lah, i dont wnat to figure, i just want my june. At least a temporary halt to work and all. Actually no, its study time for block tests in term 3. Okay im done trying to make myself feel better and failing it. Haha! School sucks):

STRESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSED):

Happy day!
Okay not very happy, i buried myself in the library for both recess and lunch, doing a lot stuff. Hectic days are here, all the workload is piling and they never seem to decrease. So why am i even blogging. Because. Just feel like forgetting everything for awhile. Its irritating when you arent on talkign terms with someone you actually care abt but tht person misunderstands or something. Urgh remorseful doesnt help. Sucks. But anyw. Yeah teachers love piling us with work. My weekends are gone. My next week is gone. Its quizzes SPAs worksheets projects presentations thats taking turn or occuring simultaneously. Greattttttttt. Way to go for procrastination, think i will never learn my lesson. So more library sessions, shall stuck my big faat butt in the library and do my work, isolate myself from the world. Hah!
Hmm back to the point of a hppy day! Haha actually it isnt really that happy like i said, but yeah, words brighten my day. If not i will be so damn siannnnnn. I love the eeyore! omgosh! so cuteeeeeee! I feel like squishing it, haha but too adorable :D So yeah loads of loveeeee.

& love is what keeps us going.

I swear i'm high on calories now. Thanks to someone who wants to stuff me with chocolates. Tsk. Evil pok. Haha anyw today was HSK. Some dumb hanyu shui ping kao shi. Three hours for a paper. It was so boring and lame because even when i go toilet, somebody has to follow me, to ensure that what? i dont talk to myself in the toilet? Hahaha funny funny. Then when it ended, somebody just had to surprise me, didn't know if i should go out. Cuz of the floods of people. yeah, and not forget the point where im infamous. Thanks la, if people like Ashleen know ah, haha everybody is going to kaypoh into me. Subtlety here i come! Thereafter i went Din Tai Fung! Wheeee! The xiao long baos were so good. They are like so much btr than Shanghai's one, where it was hard and the soup inside were not as nice as this one. Haha! And the place was kids-infested. So many littles kids! And they were so so so cute! omgosh!! I shall quote "Nowadays kids ahhhhh..." hahaaaaa, yeah kids are like so lucky cuz they get to eat good food so young when they will forgot they ever stpe into the restaurants when they grow up. Oh well!Then I spotted Toys R Us! Suddenly had the desire to go in, because too long nvr go in alrdy. Hahaaha and we were like damn excited or smth. So funny! We went in and played with the toys, i think we made the most noise lah. But quite sad, toys r us a bit small here. Go forum one! Wahaha! So fun, enjoyed myself. Lala and i saw Spongebob Squarepants toy, which reminded me of the patrick i played in Shanghai. Haha the teacher was like you did a good job acting as patrick by lking stupid. But at least i made people laugh :D
Hmm i love preparing for Grad night! Its so exciting! I like calling hotels and companies because you get a sense of satisfaction when you get a good deal or smth. Have to start year end psl camp preparation, being the overal in charge last year wasnt fun. this's year overall i c didnt even know she was the ic until last week -.- Omgdness and i rmb i started planning during march alrdy! I'm sure she would need a lot of help alrdy. Haha but i rather focus on grad night, make sure many people come, i want to hit above 200. I think 200 seems so pathetic, people shld show a bit more school spirit and fun spirit and attend such events. Last year in Ny alrdy whttttt. Go hwachong is another thing altogether! Because its our last year in ny as a class. Hmm sounds convincing? Haha i think i just sabotage people to join. Pay deposit so they have to attend :D Go exco07! We havent retire yet! Wheeeee!

Kop-ed from Jiawen's blog!(:

1. Would you chew gum after someone else already has?
Er no.

2. What describes your relationship status?
Unsingle.

3. Who were your last 5 calls from?
mum, sis, dan, jas, dan.

4. Are you a heart breaker, or the broken heart?
Haha im not a heartbreaker. Heart alrdy healed.

5. Ever been skinny dipping?
Nope, i wont ever do that too.

6. Earrings or necklace?
Necklace, haha considering that i do not have ear piercings. And i do not look like someone with piercings k!!!

7. Who have you talked to most this weekend?
Hahaha i dont know how to measure that.

8. Pumpkins?
Uh okay.

9. Friend that lives closest to you?
Mingjie.

10. Color of your shirt?
Ny pe shirt.

11. How many years have you taken a language?
you mean like chinese or english? Haha since i was born?

12. Who’s on speed dial 2?
No need speed dial. Memory is sometimes more efficient.

13. What is your background on your computer mainscreen?
The default scenery.

14. Do you wish on 11:11?
No? Why would i need to wish at that time?

15. Good advice if you ever go camping?
If it rains before you go camp, dont camp.

16. Are you a bad influence?
Hahah im a good inluence k! HAHAHA!

17. What color are your eyes?
Brown black.

18. Would you rather have your name or your siblings name?
I think i prefer mine.

19. Would you do anything for someone?
Everything.

20. Have you ever been called a bitch?
I guess. Long ago during sec one and two where people thought that 'bitch' was a hip word to refer to someone.

21. Fav. color?
Many colours!

22. Do you use smiley faces on the computer?
Uh hmm like this :D or (: or :p

23. What song is on?
I'm Yours is being played in my head.

24. Are your grades good?
Uh not content with it. Cuz it isnt good enough.

25. Do you ever think people hate you for filling these out?
Uh why would they? I'm not asking them to read.

26. Would you date anyone on your top friends?
On my top frnds list are all girls, i wouldnt date them.

27. Does your best friend have a myspace?
What century are you living in?

28. Whose page did you visit last?
Some webpage on teflon.

29. Last time you went out to lunch?
Just now only ;D Happy! Whee whee whee!

30. Do you watch the Gilmore Girls?
Uh whats tht?

31. Have you ever enjoyed listening to Jack Johnson?
Huh?????????????

32. Have you ever seen or enjoyed watching the O.C.?
Nah didnt have any interest. Prison break!

33. Do you have one or more Britney Spears C.D.s?
Nah. Never really liked her voice.

34. Which radio stations are your favorites?
No favourites. Jiaqi can probably answer a lot for this qn thought :D

35. Are you a Lost fanatic?
Nope. Obviously i hardly watch the tv prog.

36. Still have pictures of your ex?
Nah. never really had them in the first place! AHAHA.

37. Do you have a song by Ozzy Osbourne in your library?
Whos tht!

38. Alanis Morisette?
Okay whos that again?

39. Do you watch Family Guy regularly?
I hate these questions.

40. King of the Hill?
Ew?

41. Do you read trashy romance novels often?
Nope! I read nice and sweet and sometimes sad romance chinese novels. English is another thing altogether.

43. Do you sing obnoxiously in the car?
Haha! I do not sing obnoxiously!

44. Do you ever sing obnoxiously in the shower?
Heh i sing alot in the showers, but i still can control myself.

45. Have you ever watched a little kid’s show?
Yep!

46. Have you ever pretended your other half was with you when they weren’t?
Haha uh hmm!

47. Did you draw pictures for your first crush back in elementary?
No.

48. Have you ever liked a girl/boy but didn’t ask her/him out because you were afraid?
Uh no. Even if i like a guy, i wouldnt ask him out. Part of the reason is fear i suppose, but the main reason is more than that.

49. Have you ever written a poem or story about your life?
i should think not.

50. Have you ever spent over an hour thinking about nothing but a certain person?
An hour ah. Actually i can do that, but school and work deprived me of free time to do so.

51. Have you ever liked someone because of they’re appearance?
Hmm i will only like someone if i see that their character seems good overall. Actually you will get attracted to the appearance first, but you wont like them until you get to observe them and everything.

52. Do you eat all the servings in the food groups on a daily basis?
No!

53. Are you ever a freak about cleanliness or organization?
Cleanliness about the toilet maybe. Haha! You can ask wingyau about that ;D

54. Have you ever been to South America or Africa?
Nah never out of Asia!

55. Do you know how to knit?
Nope! Maybe i should learn ;p

56. Do you have a cell phone or iPod with a patterned cover?
Nah. Patterned cover is so gross on cellphones.

57. Have you ever written love song lyrics yourself and put them on myspace?
Uh i never have written.

58. Do you keep a diary or journal online?
This!

59. When you open your closet, what is the dominant color?
No dominant colour. Its just a variety!

60. Baskin Robbins or Coldstone?
Baskin Robbins!!!!! nice nice nice!! Go malaysia alot!

61. Physics or chemistry?
Urgh okay uh i like reading about physics, but i dont liek studying for exams for both.

62. Earphones or headphones?
Earphones.

63. Pink or teal?
Pink. Teal is hard to match with other colours.

64. Earrings or a ring?
Ring!

65. Commitment or casual dating?
Commitment. I dont do casual.

66. Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, or Star Wars?
Harry Potter! Wahah!

67. Fly or road trip?
Haha FLYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!

68. Starbucks?
Coffeebean!

69. What is your favorite Disney movie?
Uh all lah all lah! Hehehe!

70. Have you ever bought clothing at Sears?
No, whatever's that.

Falling out, with two people thats very close to me. Feeling aint right, feeling aint good. The unsettling feeling it like acid bubbling in the pit of my stomach. Its a tiring feeling, having to yeah well. Guilt of course develops quickly, nothing i can do now. Right now, i just dont want to do anything yet. Sometimes, people get tired of playing the nice guy. Sometimes there may be a limit to a person's patience. Sometimes, it may just get too weary for a person to handle another negative feeling towards her in a short period of 2 days. Its not an excuse, perhaps asking for a person's understanding is hard, especially when tht person doesnt have a clue wht has happened to you recently. Yeah it just boils down to my fault again. I need to try harder, to be more understanding as well. I'm dying for things to be right again. Hpefully anger will fade away soon from the people i've offended, directly or indirectly.
Walked to Vivo today. Alone. Treat it as gd exercise i guess. Haha hmm. Felt btr after that, must say thankyou for the money LENT and spent on me for lunch and trip back home :D Marche-d. Haaaaa second time in my life. Cool cool. Again, many thanks for the company and the ears lent. Or else i wouldnt have knw what to do, maybe crying in some corner and starving my ass off because i cannot go home, because some other really nice person doesnt even want to lend me sixty cents for a bus trip. But i'm not pissed nor upset, just affected. Okay i'm tired, physically and mentally. Shall sleep alrdy!

Quiz time! Im bored.

1. Song playing at the moment?
No Song.

2. Reasons for living?
Because you lived.

3. Do you think you’re ok?
Uh i guess.

4. Ever donated blood?
Nope. Maybe i can try, like one day.

5. Favorite color(s)?
Pretty colours!

6. Accessories you usually wear?
I dont even usually wear any accessories.

7. One song to describe a heartbreak in the past?
Hahah its not even worth a song.

8. Last place you went to?
Vivo.

9. Last person you went out with?
Cant disclose.

10. The most exciting sport?
Haha exciting uh. Running and swimming isnt exciting but well close :D Tennis i guess.

11. Ever had a baby?
Nah.

12. Movie you want to watch?
Definitely, Maybe.

13. Any piercings?
Clean.

14. The most romantic gift?
Most romantic ah. Hahah its many given by one.

15. Act on stage before?
Yeah, cant be bothered to count.

16. Struck by lightning before?
Hahahaha. You think?

17. Danced with your loved ones before?
Hahah if you call tht dancing then yes.

18. Ever wished you could turn back time?
No for the millionth time.

19. What would you do if you woke up one day to find yourself to be with someone from the opposite sex?
Maybe im married by then.

20. One song that’s meaningful to you?
Haha havent been in touch with songs for months.

21. Missing whoever now?
Hahah uh hmm!

22. What will you be doing tomorrow?
School kallang home.

23. Ever thought of robbing a bank?
Nah. I know Dan has tht idea all the time.

24. One thing you totally regret doing/done?
Hasnt this qn been asked?

25. Do people like you?
I hope.

26. What was the last game you played on the computer?
No game.

27. Someone who means a lot to you at the moment?
At every moment, theres this person who means more than a lot.

28.The color of your bed?
Is it pink, or is it yellow, or is it beige?

29. Do you hate someone at the moment?
Nope. Definitely not.

30. What do you wish to happen now?
June holidays.

31. Last time you ate pizza?
Haha havent ate it for a long time.

32. Ever been given a ring?
Not exactly

33. Do people think you’re weird?
Hahah i think im weird

34. Movies now showing that you hate?
Whats showing?

35. Most important thing in your room?
Bed!!!!

36. Last movie watched?
Spiderwick chronicles.

37. Last television show watched?
I cant rmb! Haven been watching tv shows.

38. Who is the person you want to see right now?
My special someone of course.

39. Ever called a person useless?
Hmm i dont think so.

40. Are you good at hiding your feelings?
At times, im good. Many a times, im not good.

My legs and feet were really itching ytd! must be because of the rain on thursday. All the dumb insects and dno wht thing tht bites. Another reason to hate insects and teh creepy crawlies. AHEM!!!!! They are really gross. The idea of one crawling on me, oh man lets not even think about it. Hahah!
Physics Blocks were disappointing. havent really been scoring in anything. Need to work harder, hmm. After realising some ppl tht is reading my blog, i concluded tht i cant really blog abt anything much alrdy. So dangerous. I shall go bury my thoughts smwhere else :D Just really happy! The card is really damn pretty! Its so cute! Haha :ppppp And shit la getting fatter. I need the motivation to run swim run swim run swim! I think i too lazy alrdy, no self motivation. Smbody run with me. Stupid wingyau, lazy pok. Run on monday lahhhhhhhhhhhh ): Maybe i shld get Eva seah.
I do not like weekends!!!

Who were your last 3 texts from?
Dan Dan Dan.

Where was your default picture taken?
Coffee Connoisseur! :D

What is your current mood?
Im feeling siannnnnn. Why is the weather so damn hot!

What color shirt are you wearing?
Hot pink! HAHAHAHAH.

Who has the ability to hurt you most?
The person who i love and trust CAN have the ability to hurt me, but doesnt do it.

If you could go back in time and change something, would you?
Like i said, nope.

Where was the last place, out of town, that you went to?
Out of town? Is school considered out of town?

Ever had a near death experience?
Uh not really.

Something you do a lot?
Smiling to myself. Hahaha not my fault k!

Do you have a fondness for gnomes?
Eeee no no! Ugly stuff.

Who can you tell EVERYTHING to?
:D

When was the last time you cried?
Uh hmm wed i suppose.

Where are you right now?
In front of the com duh?

Do you still like kiddie movies?
HEHEHHE. Yeah, cute what!

What are you eating or drinking at the moment?
That reminds me, i shall go drink water.

What’s your favorite smell?
!!! Smtimes i think i got smthign for smell but haha shant say whts my fav.

What are you thinking about right now?
I am thinking about how to answer this qn.

What should you be doing right now?
Proj stuff.

Who was the last person to upset/anger you?
My mum. But thts quite long ago. Been feeling over the moon these days.

What are you listening to?
Hmm nothing much. The fan whirring maybe?

Do you like working in the yard?
No yard to work! Even if there is, i dont think i like the idea very much thank you.

What is your natural hair color?
Black! Best colour!

Whats your favorite place in the world?
Besides you!

What is the holiday closest to your b-day?
Uh i dont know.

What is your dream car?
No dream car!

Has anyone sang or played for you personally?
Nope.

Have you broken a bone or had stitches?
Uh not that i know of.

Anyone on your mind right now?
Constantly!

Is it awkward when you run into previous hook ups?
Havent run into yet. it wont be awkward even so. I wil walk with my head up, no worries.

Have you ever done anything you regret while being drunk?
Never drunk, never drink so never any regrets.

Anything hurt on your body right now?
Haha of course not.

Who is the last person to make you laugh? When?
Dan:D On the phoooooooone!

Who can’t you stand?
Haha this question me, qianwen, huiying and wingyau were talking about ytd. Hmmmmmmmmm.

1. Where were you at 3:02 AM this morning?
* Sleeping like a piggggg.

2. How did you get the idea for your Friendster name?
* Thats lame. Cuz its my name.

3. What are you listening to right now?
* Myself typing away.

4. What color is your cell phone?
* White!

5. Do you click on pop-ups?
* Nope, pops up can be so irritating.

6. Do you own an iPod?
* Nah, too poooooor.

7. What was the first thing you thought this morning?
* More like who i thought of.

8. Is the person you like older or younger than you?
* Older duh! Will neverrrrrrrr like someone younger than me. Not even by a month.

9. What did you do last night?
* Hmm was doing work and then talking happily online :DD

10. What are the last two digits of your cell phone number?
* 35

11. What was the last thing that you eat?
* Chocolate! Oh man i have a sudden craving for ice cream. Oh no fatsssssss. Wahaha.

12. Who is the last person of the opposite sex that you hugged?
* Good question indeed :P

13. What do you dislike at the moment?
* The weekends!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

14. What food are you craving?
* Ice creammmmmmm! Island Creamery!!

15. What did you dream last night?
* I didn't dream last night. Too tired.

16. What's the last TV show you watched?
* Some taiwanese variety show.

17. What is your favorite piece of jewelery?
* Hmm necklace or ring i guess. I think earrings can be so pretty sometimes, but im lazy to pierce my ear.

18. Name 1 person on your Top Friends who is most like you?
* Uh most like me? I have no idea. We are all so different!

19. Do you always lock your door?
* Nope!

20. Of the people you've kissed, how many do you regret kissing?
* Haha no use for regrets.

21. Who is the last person you hugged?
* Isnt this question like repeated or smth?

23. How many piercings/tattoos do you have?
* ZEROOOOOOOOOOO! Tattoos are gross.

24. Where's your favorite place to be?
* With someone i love.

25. Who's someone you haven't seen in a while and miss?
* Dan! HAHAHA!

26. When was the last text you sent?
* 5 mins ago.

27. Who is the last person you talked to on the phone?
* My mum i guess.

28. Have you ever done anything to start trouble?
* Uh haha sort of. Ahem.

29. Where do you wish you were right now?
* Hmm outside to where i was about 3 hours ago.

30. Where do you live?
* Singaporeeee.

31. How are you?
* Alive and kicking and very much happy!

32. When do you think you'll be married?
* After 8 years or more. Yep.

33. Did you ever think to yourself and wonder if you're really real?
* haha the next question you are going to ask me is do you think the chair you are sitting on may be just an illusion?

34. What celebrities do people say you look like?
* Hahah those were the timessssss.

35. Does it annoy you when someone says they'll call but don't?
* Hmm if it is somebody i really bother, i would be upset and disappointed, but not annoyed.

36. Do you ever feel guilty about eating meat?
* Eh heheh not really! :D

Whoosh. Shall retype my entire post which got deleted away. Eh no, i shall summarise it instead. I learnt a lesson. To never psot pictures anywhere anyhow, because some people will use it to threaten me -.- Best. Or they will talk to whoever and whoever tells my mum. Haha but whts done done. Too badddddddd. Monday was quite boring until some dumdum smsed me 'im starting to like linden drive alot' Haha got toblerone and card in return! Dan just wants me to get fat, evil evil. How to finish. Tsk. Tuesday was dumb during language arts. This group suggested to make every household give birth to 3 children in FIVE years as a compulsory duty in a new civilisation. AHAHA then wont everybody have to be sexually active in the first few years of their marrigae?! The funniest thing was melissa suggested that everybody has to keep as quiet as possible aft 10pm every night to facilitate reproduction. Oh my gosh lah! Thats so wht the ?!?!?!?!??!?! Me and lili went on thinking and talking abt it. Haha i mean imagine this country aft 10 pm silence, then everyone jsut uh set on their duty to reproduce, then they will all make the same noise!! Ew hahah! Okay la, not same noise, some higher pitch... hahah okay quite sick. Damn crap :DD But sooo funny!
Hmm today was funner!Went to this ulu shop to eat high tea WAHAHA. The muffins are really nice! I like i like! Chocolate and banana, hahaha and its really filling. Though a bit sinful. Scones cld be better if there were strawberry jam. Darjeeling tea was disappointing. I think the packets one nicer. Oh well, i prfer eng breakfast and earl's gry tea anyw! Wanted to eat island creamery but too full alrdy, stomach cnt take it. Haha next timeeee! Whee shall not say anythign more alrdy. I just really really like the talking part after that :D

It felt like a dream, an illusion, but now i've realised this is all true and happening. And it's been the happiest i have ever been.

Your status please.
: Takennnnnn.

2. How many hours do you sleep?
: Six. Hahaha i think i look more energetic than poeple like jiaqi who complains she's tired when she sleeps at 10pm -.-

3.Do you own a laptop or cellphone?
: Cellphone.

4 Where is your bf/gf?
: Tuition centre. I want to go tooooo!

5.Last person you kissed?
: Hmmm.

6. Have you been to the movie in last 5 days?
: Hahah last 5 days? Nah! There ain't any good movies now anway!

7.Last food that you ate?
: HAHA Chocolateeeee.

8 . Your dream vacation?
: Many places. Europeeee here i come!

9.Have you been in love?
: Still is!

10. Do you miss anyone right now?
: Goes without saying.

11. What are you listening to right now?
: Just tv sounds

12. Do you collect anything?
: Haha i collect really niec plastics bags, and really cute angbao. I collect nice letter pads and i used to collect stickers. Okay haha i collect alot of stuff. Wheeee.

13. Last time you took shower?
: I just did!

14. Have you ever liked someone so much that it hurt?
: Yeah it WAS suffocating.

15. Have you ever broken someone else's heart?
: Hahah i think i did. But it wasn't my fault!!

16. If you could go back in time and change things, would you?
: Nope. I think everythign happens for a reason. Things may be bad but you get to learn from them.

17. Whats in your mind?
: Hahah question should be who!

18. How do you feel right now?
: Fuuuuuuuuuuull.

19. What was the last SMS you receive about?
: Hhaha personal stuff.

20. Do you smoke?
: Hurhur. Never will.

21. Usual first impression on you.
: I don't know. Nice perhaps. Haha hopefully.

22. Last person you talked to on the phone?
: My sistahhhhh.

23. What's yr answer in no.8?
: You can go check yourself.

24 . Where's the best tymee to eat icecream?
: HAHA! When the icecream's goooood. And when you feel unsinful.

25. What are you doing tomorrow?
: School. Blahhhh.

26. Were you a nerd in 5th grade?
: Is that like p5 or something. Yeah nerd all the way. Happy nerd! Hahaha.

27. Have you ever been on Tv?
: Uh hahaha once. Some minor stuff only though.

28. Have you ever loved so much that you're willing to sacrifice your life for him/her?
: If there's really a need, i will.

29. 3 things about yourself?
: Retarded, dumb but reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeally nice. Haaaaaa.

30. What's bothering you?
: School projects.

31. What are you thinking?
: When will our workload ever stop increasing.

33 . Best childhood memory
: Many nice childhood memories.

34. 3 of your biggest fears:
: Change, loss, loneliness.

35 . Would you ever get back together with any of your ex's if they asked you?
: Haha i would never ever everrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr do that.

36. Want to marry?
: Yeah, definitely. :DDDDDDD

37. To whom?
: Someone who wants to marry me!

38. Alaska or Hawaii?
: Hawaii.

39.Do you love chocolates?
: It's like a necessity! Wingyau should answer this question.

40. Words for the day.
: It's loveeeeeee.

Friction causes wear and tear.
Hahah, i dont like my sister. Why she never gets fat. Okay maybe except the fact tht she has a round belly, but shes still so skinny! When she eats a lot. Cannot stand it. Haha and she keep comparing my height with hers, keep wanting to grow as tall as me and taller. Shes 15smth cm and she claims she wants to grow to 170cm or even higher. Mad. Wht is the rationale behind the wanting to grow so tall for?
Anyway! I feel accomplished today even though i still haevtn freaking complete my essay plus reflections. But i cleaned up my house! Or rather the mess i made in my house. Hahh which was basically the livign room and study room area. It took me the entire afternoon, from one plus to about 5. Five hours leh, power. But i was happily cleraing them up. The papers, punch holes file file file, neatly stack and pile them. Then separate the differing subjects into diff files. And then i went to clear my study room table, wiped the table wiped the pc wiped the books, and now its so clean! Wheeeeee Im in a clean environment! Felt so accomplished after that! And then i did my chinese stuff, my math reflections ,my bio ws. Still got physics though, but as usual i dont understand a bit of it. So tmr i shall refer. Ahem. Haha okay i better stopped blogging. I shall sleep to prevent a worsening of my eyebags. Teeeedum!

I was being stupid. Haha actually not really. I was just irritated by some reason which i don't know. I was not in the right mood. I was worse than sian. Maybe to the point of pissing off. Hahhhhh funny funny. I was sulking, literally. I didnt wait for my family to eat finish, i just wlaked off by myself, alone. Walked around Marine parade then walked to ntuc. Was feeling so sian that i feel sleepy. I guess i was moodswinging, pmsing or whtever it is. And then there was this flood of sweetness through messages. Seriously sweetness which lit up my face immediately, and i was smiling like crazy. At first it was a small smile, then it grew and grew into a grin, and then into this nooise you make when you are happy, and then giggling and then laughter. Haha even I think i lk like an insane person. Im smiling to a phone. Hahahaaaaaaa. Annnnnnnnd then i finally realised whts bothering me all these while, and whats really making me so unme. Its not rly much of a moodswing. Its more of an absence tht causes that. Heh yep, quite sad. But happy all the same. Sweetness is really good. Hah!
Had tonnes of work left undone. I really hate the teachers and the school. Smth is wrong with them and their brains. Do they find joy in showering us with hmwork and projcs and nvr ending deadlines? Do they purposely make the deadlines of hmwork clash, and make it seem coincidental. Like alot of them was supposedly fall on friday, then got extended to next monday? Not sayign tht extension is no good. Its good but we need our weekends, hello?!?!?!?! Cant they give a deadline like tuesday or wednesday. One more day is btr than nothing. Haha im getting irritated all over again. Blah. How to finishhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh? How. I lk at my messy table, lk at the moutnains of papers piled up, very disorganized, very untidy, and i know i need to clear all of them up, becfore i have the mood to study. I prefer start doign my work all over again in a neat and clean environment, with documents stacked in place. Or else i'll be super uncomfortable, and i find no mood in studying, my mind will switched to a permanent holiday mood. Hahaha im so weird i know. Another reason to hate block tests cuz they make my place horribly messy, and aft blocks, you feel as if it's the holidays and school is over kind of mode.
Hmm, confirmation is next saturday. I don't know if im lking forward to it or not. Rehearsal today was so dumb. Seriously, we go there just to know where we sit and how we lined up? Waste of time. They can easily lined us up and show us wher we sit in a word doc or smth. But oh well, guess they need the godparents to be informed as well. Actually, theres nth exciting about it. No wonder they say it will just be another day. Maybe, let's hope it holds as a significant day for me. And then took a few pictures with rachel and bernice. Haha piggybacked rachel, proving tht shes really light. Hahah truth to be told, shes nice to piggybacked. I think she ought to know. Cuz shes rly petite and light. Wahaha okay she shld be proud of her lightness. Not like me, i shudder at the thought of smbody piggybacking me. Someone said i look light enough to be piggybacked, i said no thanks straight away. Hahaaaaaaaa funny man. I got heavy bones heavy fats. Anyw, i m tiredddddddd. Very tired. Eyes drooping, even thoguh i woke at 11 today. Pig alrdy. But i shall go to sleep, and die tmr doing hmwork. I bet my class alrdy finished half the work given. I guess my heart is just smwhere else, heeeee. Oh and i got back chinese paper. Failed compo, both smmore. Yay -.- But my compre seriously pulled me up. I'm still gloating away with the fact tht i plus 10 and a half marks from my original. I'm pro manzxzxzx. Haha i'm so happy that from a failing mark i can go all the way up to b3. Omgosh i shld be crying if i get b3, but the compo qn was misleading, almsot everybody failed, and blahblah. End up the 67 i got was quite a high mark for overall in my class. Nobody got a1. About 5 got a2. So im considered lucky i guess. I btr buck up. I need to ace my chinese. Get a1!!!! But besides that, everybody in my class got an A1 for biology. Like 100%?!?!??!?! Omgosh?! They crazy or crazy? The entire level only my class got all a1. Wah mugger class la. Hahah i got like 52, then plus another 2 marks for bio. Gd gd. Satisfied. Math was okay, i want to get beyond 50 but only got 47. Class highest was 59 -.- Damn it. Being in a smart class demoralizes me stimes. I shall just treat it as reverse psychology then! Make myself work harder! Stop procrastinating and whining and complaining. Time to be really be serious and get my work done good and proper. Go me!
:D

1. Name one person who made you laugh today
` Haha evil dan.

2. What were you doing at 0800am?
` Library.

3. What were you doing 30 minutes ago?
` Having dinner and watching tv

4. What happened to you in 2007?
` Hahha unhappy stuff which doesnt matter any more.

5. What was the last thing you said out loud?
` I got a lot of hmwork laaaaaa.

6. How many beverages did you have today?
` Only one.

7. What color is your hairbrush?
` Uh hahaha some colour.

8. What was the last thing you paid for?
` Waffle!

9. Where were you last night?
` At home.

10. What color is your front door?
` Brown/Bronze?

11. What are you listening to?
` Nothing.

12. What’s the weather like today?
` HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT!

13. What’s the best ice-cream flavor?
` Cookiesncreme. As usual.

14. What excites you?
` Hahah many things.

15. Do you want to cut your hair?
` No. Tired of cutting. Hair hair please grow.

16. Are you over the age of 25?
` Hahah nope.

17. Do you talk a lot?
` Hahah too much sometimes.

18. Do you watch the O.C?
` Nah. No time, no interest.

19. Do you know anyone named Steven?
` Yep. Irritating immature.

20. Do you make up your own words?
` I used to. And then i advertise and laughed at them.

21. Are you a jealous person?
` Hmm. I knw i get jealous if im sure its really smth thts reasonable to be jealous about. Yep, makes sense?

22. Name a friend whose name starts with B.
` Bernice

23. Name a friend whose name starts with the letter ‘F’.
` Uh felisa.

24. Who’s the first person on your received call list?
` Dont even need to check, its Dan tthe dumdum.

25. Have you ever not reply somebody? why?
` Yep. Smtimes run out of msg, smtimes you have to ignore them so they will stop pestering you.

26. Whose text message you kept on reading repeatedly?
` HAHA! Secret!

27. Do you put your cellphone by your side when you're sleeping?
` Nope. Cant anyw.

28. Do you think of anyone when you're going to sleep?
` Yeah(:

29. Do you look at somebody picture before going to sleep?
` Hahah good question!

30. Are you in love now?
` You think? :D

Wahahahhahaa. Wednesday! That was ytd. ;DDDD Fun fun fun! Like seriously enjoyed every moment. On the bus, just walking around, browsing around, doing stupid stuff, and so much more. Hahah nver knew how fun it could be. Shan't say much, details only the parties know, feelings i shall keep close at heart. And today! HAAAAAAAAAAAAAA Funny lah funny. My heart cannot take shocks well. I went swimming. Hmm happily deluding myself from the time when i was preparing to go swim to the time aft i finished swimming. Should have just confronted. Haha dont knw why it still came as a big shock to me, even though it really is supposed to be expected. Oh lets see, maybe because somebody purposely tricked me and lied about going to bathe. Maybe. Maybe cuz i always believed him, even though i know hes always up to evil ideas. HAHAHA. Evil la. When i saw the sms, i almost screamed in the toilet. And i think my face was burning hot. Literally. Seriously, nvr in my life i felt my face so hot before. Hmm must be the swimming before. Must be man. And i saw it was uh, hmmm red. Hahah yah dah yah dah. And i couldnt stop myself, so idiot. Heh but point is, okay im secretly happy for tht shock. Wht am i tlaking abt. Hahah just happy. Love the card! As if anyone has ever done tht to me before, as if anyone showed me tht much love before. Uh hmm. Details are again divulge. I said more than i shld say. But i do appreciated everything done.

I LOVE DAN POH CHING HONG!

There. I've said it. I've announced it, but i didn't write that for the sake of announcing? Hahah yup. I said that to confirm everything. Most importantly, I said that because I mean it. And I'm not afraid to let anyone know that I love this guy called Dan, nor am I afraid to let people laugh at me, or how love crazy I am. Hahaha, not afraid anymore. The time together doesn't prove anything, because short as it might be, it has proven so much more, let me know and expect so much more, and to feel so much more in love than before. Seriously, i can't ask for anything more. I'm like basking in this love. BASKING! Hahah! Actually I'm surprising even myself. I didn't even care about the onlookers or kaypoh people, didnt care the looks some would give me, haha so unlike the self-conscious me. I used to be scared, used to avoid, used to deny. But point is, i guess when you are truly happy with that someone, you wouldn't really care about anything else or anyone's comments except him, except the things he say and do. If truth to be told, I think a thousands over thankyous will not be enough. It's not just mere appreciation, it's the sweetness and the happiness and the thought behind. I never knew the true meaning of the act of caring for someone until now, because it's true care i feel that is given upon me. Uh hmmm, details I shan't disclose, i don't need more talking behind me. I shall live my life and enjoy it. WOOHOO BLOCKS ARE OVER!

HAPPY SWEET 16TH BDAY JIALE! ;DDDDD

1. last beverage: HONEYLEMON! HAHAHA LOVE POTION!
2. last phone call: Dan!
3. last time you cried: Loooooooooooooong ago.
4. last text message to: Dan! Of course.

SIX HAVE YOU EVERS:
1. dated someone twice: Nope.
3. kissed someone & regretted it: Hahah what's done done.
4. lost someone special: Hmm my best frnd last time.
5. been depressed: Hahaha i guess so. More of emoing.
6. been drunk and threw up: No i never drink. Eva should probably answer this question.

LIST THREE FAVORITE COLORS:
White is a very nice colour. So is yellow actually. Orange! Green! Black! Red! Brown pink i'm jsut goign to list every colour that exists.

THIS MONTH HAVE YOU:

1. Made a new friend:
Hahah nope.

2. Laughed until you cried:
No, havent done that in a long time.

3. Met someone who changed your life:
Uh hmm(: Special someone.

4. Found out who your true friend is:
There are many true frnds actually.

5. Is there something you want to tell someone:
Haha actually i really really really wnat to say thank you, for everything but yeah.

6. How many kids do you want to have:
Eh dont know leh. More than 1. Or else the poor little kid has no one to play with.

7. Do you have any pets:
Nope.

8. Do you wanna change your name:
I like my nameeeeeee!

9. What did you do yesterday :
I studied like crazy.

10. Last time you had pizza:
Hmmm that would be during church camp.

1. What time did you wake up :
06am.

12. What were you doing at 10:30 a.m.:
I was watchign a video on environmen sustainability -.-

13. Name something you CANNOT wait for:
TOMORROOOOOOOOOOOOOOW! PLEASE COME QUICK!

14. Last time you saw your father:
Just now when he fetch me home.

15. What is one thing you wish you could change from ur life:
My life doesnt need much changes.

16. What are you listening to right now:
Not listening

17. Have you ever talked to Tom And Jerry?:
Hahah what kind of question man. No. Think you could plan a meeting with them?

18. Who's getting on your nerves right now:
My cough thats what.

19. Most visited webpage:
Fs Fb Blogs.

20. Coke or Pepsi:
Water!

21. Have you seen anyone naked in the past few week:
Hahahaaaaaaa let's not talk about it.

When I see your words, I love. My heart fly like a dove, sweet and lovely words of thee.

Does coughing too much hurts your back? And then after that hurts your stomach? So sad, my cough has worsen overnight, or maybe overmedicine. Smth's rly wrong with the medicine. This is the second time i took it, the second time that it makkes me cough more. Conclusion: The supposedly cough medicine makes you cough more. Follow-up Action: THROWAWAYTHATDAMNTHING. HAHAHAH. Mad already. Cough cough go away, never come again another day. Flu too. Sucks being sick. Cannot swim cannot run cannot do so many things.
Whee aft tmr will be freeeeee. Waahahaha. Okay not free because other projcets like chem and humans will come and we will slog like shit again. Slog whole year la. Blahhhhhhhhhhhhhh disgustingzxzxzxzxz.

1. Where is the last place you held hands?
With who, thats what matters.

2. If you were drafted into a war, would you survive?
Hahaha i'd probably drift away.

3. Do you sleep with the TV on?
No.

4. Have you ever drank milk straight out of the carton?
I only did that once or twice and that was long agoooo.

5. Have you ever won a spelling bee?
Hahahaha no. never attended any.

6. What is your longest fight with one of your friends?
Friends I really care about - 1 month
Idiots - Cant be bothered to count.

7. Are you a fast typer?
Hahahah okay lah, im a typer who always type wrongly.

8. Are you afraid of the dark?
In unfamiliar surroundings, yes.

9. Do you like someone right now?
Like is an understatement.

10. What ended your last relationship?
Beats me. Glad it ended! :DDDD

12. Do you knock on wood?
Eh? Yah.

13. Are you drinking anything right now?
Nope.

14. Do you think you're in love?
Definitely.

15. Have you ever eaten a bug?
EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW.

16. Do you miss someone right now?
Yes! Very badly.

17. What do you want for Christmas?
I want to sing for xmas!

18. Do you know the muffin man?
Haha in children books.

19. Do you talk in your sleep?
Eh not that i know of.

20. Do you remember your 1st crush?
Hahah i guess so, vaguely.

21. Have you ever flown a kite?
OOOH I WANT FLY KITE! Havent done that for a loooong time.

22. When was the last time that you went swimming and where?
Last tues. Safra.

23. Do you think the guy you like likes you?
;DDDD

24. Do you like singapore?
Actually yes.

25. Have you ever asked for a horse?
Nah.

26. Plans for tomorrow?
SLEEEEEEEEP, GET WELL, SWIM. Haha the prospect of swimming is quite low though.

27. What did you do this past weekend?
Study. No life man.

28. Miss being at school right now?
HAH! Answering yes would be lying.

Haha couldnt resist myself.

1. What is on your bed right now?
My bolsterm my pillow my soft toyyyyyyyyyyy! Yay cute and cuddly!

2. When was the last time you threw up?
Last year, i still rmb. Horrible period.

3. What's your favorite word or phrase?
Hahah alot! Like 'funny ah', 'like real', 'Ha.Ha.' blahblahblah.

4. Name something that made you smile today.
A early morning call! A specially messaged sms!

5. What were you doing at 8 am this morning?
Doing that dumb lang arts paper.

6. What were you doing 30 minutes ago?
Talking to Dannnnn!

7. What is your favorite holiday?
Haha just give me holidays, that will do.

8.Do you have a sister? If you do, where is she?
Yes. Shes at her frnds house doing project.

9. What is the last thing you said aloud?
Er i cant rmb.

10. What is the best ice cream flavour?
COOKIESN'CREME!

11. What was the last thing you had to drink?
Plain water!

12. What are you wearing right now?
Shirt and shorts.

13. What was the last thing you ate?
Bread.

14. Have you bought any new clothing items this week?
Hahah er last week. My white dress for confirmation!

15. When was the last time you ran?
Ran? Hahah shit, if you counted running during monday's pe lesson as running.

16. What's the last sport event you watched?
That would be a really long time ago. Soccer.

18. Who is the last person you sent a comment/message on myspace?
i dont use myspace.

19. Ever go camping?
Yep!

Where is 20?
HUH. Crap man.

21. Have you ever lost anything down a toilet?
Hahah hopefully i never will.

23. Do you use smiles on the computer?
Yep, like :D and :P and (:. Used ot be crazy over smilies.

26. Are you someone's best friend?
Haha yah, and i'm quite sure of that.

27. What are you doing tomorrow?
Church, study study more study.

28. Where is your mum right now?
Downstairs, somewhere.

29. Look to your left, what do you see?
Messy pile of books and papers.

30. What color is your watch?
Black and red.

32. Ever ridden on a roller coaster?
Yes! yay roller coasters are so fun!

33. What is your middle name?
Alyssa? I guess?

34. Do you go in at a fast food place or just hit the drive thru?
Hahah i go in.

36. Do you have a dog?
Nope, no special liking.

37. Last person you talked to on the phone?
Dan, of course.

38. Have you met anyone famous?
Uh kind of.

39. Any plans today?
Today's ending.

41. Are you happy?
It's called ecstasy.

42. Where are you right now?
Study room, like always.

43. Biggest annoyance in your life right now?
Stupid block tests.

46. Are you allergic to anything?
Not that i know of.

47. Favorite pair of shoes you wear all the time?
That pair of shoes lorrrrrrr.

48. Are you jealous of anyone?
Nope!

49. Are you married?
Hahha yah man.

50. Is anyone jealous of you?
Stupid question, stupid quiz.

51. What time is it?
6.42pm

53. Do you eat healthy?
Hahah yeah, sometimes.

54. What do you do during the day?
Schoooooooool.

56. Do you use the word 'hello' daily?
Hahah yah, sort of.

58. How old will you be turning on your next birthday?
16, still. Man i feel young.

60. How did you get one of your scars?
I fell down on the road, and its been there ever since.

Haha i curbed myself from blogging for a few days. Because blogging is super unsafe. Haaaaaa, but then again, nvm lah. People want to know then know lor, i realised i'm not really making any attempts to hide it. Hmm but its quite weird. Like when you were emo, and posted all sorts of depressing things on your blog, nobody really bothers abt it, blog becomes permanently dead and rotting. But when you blogged abt these kind of things ah, the news will spread like wildfire.
Wheee anyw, monday! Another big surprise, and lots of shock. Like seriously shock lah, i think my mouth opened damn big for awhile when i realised wht really happened then after tht i started laughing and smiling like crazy. Haha and i was insanely quiet before that, well until i received something. Oh my gosh lah, really shocked k, and its not nothing, for the last time. It's damn sweet. Heh but it's a really really nice surprise, left me happy throughout the day.
Hah and tuesday, saw dan's name on dear cherie's paper. Hahah best best. That was kind of shocking too, but oh welllll expected anyway. And the papers these day were okay. Lang arts and chinese still scary, i think i didnt knw wht i was writing. Three more papers to go and its freedom! Oh man it really feels like eoys. Sucksssss. i dont rmb slogging so hard for a ca paper. The school's just trying to make us study more. Disgusting man. I btr go back to studying alrdy. Boo.

A day without you is like a day without sunshine.

Hahah i'm still replaying wht happened ytd afternoon. So funny. "Can you kindly come down to claim your water bottle?" Haha i'm going crazy i was still like huh, wht he talking abt? Heh it's considered a big enough surprise anyw! ;D Happy, i think even if its not once a day, once every 2 days there will be moments of me smiling like crazy. Dan's fault!
Hmm had church today. Sang like a frog. My headache's gotten worse, mst be due to the lack of sleep. Only slept at 2 ytd, which rly sucks. I realised i wasn't really stressed, yet, because Eva showed me wht was stress. She really went bonkers, hahaha. She copied and pasted dno how many stuff of it, and i couldnt absorb any. And she went on chanting why why why and how how how and all that. She asked questions which she answered on her own later on. Haha basically, i was just entertaining her, makign sure she isnt reduced to the state whereby she talks to the wall. ANDEVASEAHYOUCUCKOOPIECEOFSHIT, you btr not drink outside. Or else i get jiale,jiaqi,jasmine,wingyau,qianwen to fan lian with you. Idiot.
Okay hahah anyw! I want to open a wedding shop! Yay fun fun fun! Earn big bucks! Damn fun, and it's a happy job and its smth i like to do! And i can do it with someone! :D hor! Hahha! yay happy thought! And i shall go and bury myself in the piles of workshit i have. tadah!

1. What is more difficult: to let go everything or forget what happened?
♥ Doesnt seem that difficult once its over, but i guess its letting go. Right now, i wouldnt want to let go of anything!(:

2. Think of the last time you were angry. Why were you angry?
♥ Hahah er cannot rmb leh.

3. You will die in three minutes. Last call?
♥ If i'm dying around my love ones, i dont need to call. I dont feel liek thinking about dying just yet.

4. If you could do anything OR wish anything, what would it be?
♥ Score high, get high, june hols to come.

5. You can have one of the following two things: trust or love
♥ Love duh! You can trust a person but doenst mean you will love him. But when you love someone, trust comes about more easily.

6. Would you or have you ever blackmailed someone?
♥ Gotten blackmailed, hahaaaaaa.

7. Think of the last person whom you know.
♥ Er dan?

8. Are you the kind of friend that you would want to have as a friend?
♥ Ah? Haha whatever. yes la yes la.

9. Would u sleep with someone if u had the chance?
♥ Sleep? As in you literally mean just sleep and snore on the bed? Then why not?

10. Are you old fashioned?
♥ in some ways yes, its not called old fashioned! Its um traditional!

11. What would be harder for you, to tell someone you love them or that you do not love them back?
♥ I do not love them back.

12. What things would be the hardest thing for you to give up on?
♥ I wouldn't want to give up on love and i won't.

13. Romantic love, when was the last time you told someone you loved them?
♥ TODAYYYYYYYYYY:D

14. Imagine. It is a dark night, you are alone, it is raining outside, you hear someone walking around outside your window. WHO do you wish was there with you?
♥ Hahaha shhhhh.

15. Would you give a homeless person CPR?
♥ I don't know how to do CPR!

16. You are holding onto your grandmother..
♥ -.- Huh? hands?

IF YOU HAVE 3 MONTHS TO LIVE:

17. Do you tell anyone or everyone you are going to die?
♥ Not everyone. Just people close to me.

18. What do you do with your remaining days?
♥ I'd do whtever i want to do.

19. Would you be afraid?
♥ I guess so.

BIGGGGGGGGGGGGGG Surprise! Hahaha considerably small to someone actually but it's big enough for me! Haha Dan came to my house to surprise me. Clap clap clap. To return my waterbottle and to give me smth else. More surprises. But yeah, he made my day! Seriously, i couldnt stop smiling after that, no mood to do work anymore. I think nobody ever bothered to even surprise me lah hahah. I think i've disclosed enough stuff for ppl to kaypoh or talk behind me. Haha surprisingly how many people read my blog, but they stay anonymous. Like mel, nvr knew she reads my blog. And jasmine too. But actually, doesnt matter. I think i attracted many kaypoh ppl, cuz of my nic my frndster and my dp. HAHAH! Aiyahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh very interesting meh. Next time they have boyfriend alrdy also will like tht wht. okay im talking rubbish alrdy, must be because of my headache. Hmmmm. I love you man! :P Happyhappyhappy dayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!
I hate the school. Like seriously. Every year theres this one period wher they love squeezing in projects and tests together. Wonderfully, they changed the weightage of projects and tests, so why the hell are we working and slogging so hard for projects! And they just have to change block tests to common tests. Man. Sucks. I didnt wnat to complain but yeah i stil did. Couldnt stand it. They think our march holidays are given to just studying and working on projects. Whatever happen to going out or maybe other stuff like camp and wht not? Okay whtever. I can go on grumbling forever but not accomplished anything.
Bye people.

QUIZ TIME!

Alright, so have you ever actually sat down and thought about why you like the person you like?
` Hahah yeah.

Do you honestly think you could last a week without a computer or cellphone?
` Nooooooooooooo, i cant.

Do you care about how you eat?
` How i eat? Haha sometimes.

Have you ever gone out of your way to do something nice for someone?
` It wasn't really out of my way. And i don't know if it can be considered as nice, but its surprising. haha.

Have you ever gone out of your way to do something mean to someone?
` Gone out of my way? Uhhh no? Whats the point?

When you get embarrassed what usually happens?
` Uh i hide my face. HEH!

Is there someone you don't really know but they bother you?
` Hmm i don't think so?

Do you think alot of people think bad things about you?
` Haha i'm sure there are people out there.

Do you call anyone babe?
` Babe? Noooooooo. Luckily no one calls me babe too.

Who's car were you last in?
` My dadddd.

When was the last time you kissed someone?
` Ytd :DDDDDDDDDD

Last thing you ate?
` Orange Fruit!

Last thing you drank?
` Water!

What were you doing at midnight last night?
` I was online ;p

What was the first thing you did when you woke up?
` I switched on my phone for an obvious purpose.

When you're at the grocery store do you use the self checkout?
` Nope!

What does your last incoming text say?
` Not able to disclose.

What does your last outgoing text say?
` Hah i'm not going to say that.

Why did your last relationship end?
` Good question! And a good thing it ended too!

Still friends with the ex?
` HAHA! Really good frnds manzxzxzxzxzx.

Who was the last person you said you loved on the phone?
` Dannnnn.

How many hours of sleep did you get last night?
` 8 hours. Yay normal sleeping hours again.

What do you have planned for tonight?
` Uh study study study!

Who was the last person to make you laugh so hard?
` Laugh so hard? I cannot think now. Haha ask me that again.

How have you felt today?
` Not myself. but really very happy, like always.

Who was the last person to wear your clothes?
` My sister.

Who was the last person you ran into unexpectedly?
` Haha dan! Or rather, he ran into me unexpectedly! Fun fun!

Would you rather get up early or sleep in?
` Hahah get up early! Too much sleep makes me sick.

Who's the last person you got into an argument with?
` I think my mum?

Do you ever turn your cell phone off:
` Yeah sometimes at night.

How is the room you are in right now:
` My table is really messy, i dont even want to see it. Haha!

Can you sleep in jeans:
` So hot! Crazy! And so uncomfortable.

How many texts are in your inbox:
` Alot alot alot! More than 500 i think!

Who was the last person you shared a bed with?
` Still is sharing. My sister!

Which of your friends lives closest to you?
` Uh mingjie. She stays a block away.

Which friend did you wish last?
` Wish? Eh jiaqi! HAPPY BELATED BDAY JIAQI! LOVEYOUUUUU!

Is there anyone you regret ever meeting?
` No, there are no use for regrets. I just love and cherish my present.

Have you ever felt replaced?
` Yep.

Are you only friends with the rich?
` Hahah duh no!

Ever kissed a Blondie?
` Nope.

Have you ever taken a shower while you were drunk or high?
` I was nvr drunk or high, and nvr will be.

Did you have a dream last night?
` Haha i don't think so. Slept like a dead pig.

Had church camp. It was okay. I think the reason why i only went there, is for rachel and bernice, and to go for confession and to go for praise and worship. I don't really wnat to comment much on why i didnt want to go. Because I feel that, it doesnt really matter if i go camp or not, because I know inside me that I do love God, and even though i don't have that gift of tongues, and even though i left camp on tuesday night for a stupid reason, at least I know that i'm more of a devotee to church than many others. But anyway, whatever. Okay confession was really helpful. I jsut cried out to Father Arro. And he was advising me what to do and all. He's such a fatherly priest. I love him. And i shall read the bible more! Yep.
I had the most incredible night outside. Like seriously. I think figuring my way to someplace unknown is quite fun, especially when you're looking for someone you cant wait to see. Yay i was quite happy that i found my way. WITHOUT A CAB! Haaaaaaaaaaaah. And i went there, and i went to surprise Dannnn! The look of shock and surprise mixed together on his face was priceless! Hahah but i went there to look for him, not jsut to purposely shock him la, but to see him. Which makes me happy. Hahah, he was 'ohmygod-ing' away while i laughed. Haha! Cuz he didnt want me to see him in specs and all. But haha i purposely caught him with specs. I think he look cute wht! With ruffled hair and a math shirt HAHAHA. His classes are quite fun. The guys are horribly cheeky lah. Cannot stand it. Haha but fun lah. And there was this 2 small pre school kids who came with their mother to register for playhouse i think. And i gave them french fries. beacuse they are so adorable, and they waved hi to me and smile at me. SO CUTEEEEEEEEEEEE! Haha okay im like a paedophile, just like Dan hor?
Trip to the beach was fun! Although it rained, but still fun! Candles! Pretty candles and pretty wax! Hahah it was a pretty sight until they all died. Heh okay shan't say too much already. I shall sleep and wake up tmr and start studying ): Boo.

[01] Are you currently in a relationship?
Haha i think its very obvious :D

[02] Have you ever been given a rose?
Yep! i was given a rose during sec 1 and 2, given another rose this year, plus a bouquet! WHEEE.

[03] What is your all-time favorite romance movie?
Haha all time fav? I dont think i have any.

[04 ] There's no number 4 question..
HUH? Okay this is seriously lame.

[05] Do you believe that everyone has a special someone out there?
Definitely, just a matter if they find him/her or not.

[06] What's your current problem?
Hmmm my fats? HAHA.

[07] Have you ever had your heart broken?
Haha who cares about that when my heart is already healed and taken?

[08] Your thoughts of online or long distance relationships?
Doesnt work for me.

[09] Have you ever seen a friend as more than a friend?
Ehhhh i don't think so.

[10] The person your with right now, do you want to spend your life with?
Of course(:

[11] How many kids do you want to have?
A gazillion. Haha! Nah, i dont really know. Heheh.

[12] What is/are & your favorite colors?
Many many favourite colours!

[13] Who are your celebrity crush?
I think celebrity crushes are stupid.

[14] Do you believe you truly only love once?
Haha still loving?

[15] Imagine you're 79 & your spouse just died, would you get re-married?
Are you nuts? Of course not!

[16] At what age did you start noticing the opposite sex?
Haha noticing? Like uh nusery? There are already boys in my class. NOTICING is one thing, having crushes for them is another.

[17] What song do u want to be played at your wedding?
Many songs! I am greedy but there are alot os super nice songs i want to have!

[18 ] Do you like anyone?
I like everyone, but i only love one person.

I'm a happy happy girl!
Haha anyw, i was just thinking of graces camp. Thinking of the 2 nights. I realised we didnt talk enough on the first night, even though we talked for abt 2 hours or so. Hahah. Second night was liek so fun. Because everybody was rushing to put on makeup, and standing in front of the mirror, asking for help asking for advice and opnions because the lightings in the room suckkkkk. Haha and i was desperately trying to make my eyeliner look the same on both eyes. That was the part i took the longest. Thennnn, i realised my cheeks were already blushed red, dont have to put on blusher. But hahah were advised to 'better put on' some. My lips also laaaaa, dont know why. So i just put on very little lip gloss. And the best part of the make up was pixie dust!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yay!!!! I love pixie dust. i want to buy man. That will be the only make up i have. Haha! But pixie dust are so cute! Yay glittery stuff! Jiale has this bathroom towel wrapped around her, hahah! BUt she looks very angelic. Wingyau and jiaqi both looked very mature, like those modern, young but mature looking women. Jasmine looks cute! Eva was the best. Because its as if she went through a whole make over, actually she did lah. But ahahha like transformation. And she was proclaiming to the whole world that she looks like a girl -.- When she already are, but her point was she uh haha nvm. But she looks quite pretty lo. She should try to be at leat half of how she lks that night everyday. More char bo, and not so chor lor. Haaaaa. If she's reading this, i'm going to get it when school reopens. Haha!!
Hmmm end of thoughts.

Graces was cool! Lke even though i learnt practically nothing. Hahah except walking and running in heels! Never knew i could walk and even run in heels without falling down o rbreaking the heel part. Quite cool. Had buffet for every breakfast, lunch, tea and dinner. We were pratically eating everytime. Siao. OH except for the formal dinner, we had this proper dinner. Appetizer, entree, dessert! CHEESECAKE!! OH MY GOSH! CHEESECAKE IS LOVEEEEEEE! Wahah. Took super many pictures, was in the mood to camwhore, basically everybody was camwhoring in the marquee. Everyone was just smiling for the camera. Hmm i shall start talking from day one, we had this theory and practical session on makeup! Quite fun lah, free products to use, so use more. But i concude i hate mascara. So grosssssssss. I never want to put that disgusting thing on my eyelashes. I like my eyelashes just fine. Even though they aint very long. Haha then aft tht had a workshop on emceeing. Oh my gosh. That was the worst lah. He wrote a book about how to speak effectively. How ironic is that? I think i can host better than him lah. Seriously. I was like so bored. 3 hours of him. I didnt knw how i survived but i did. I resorted to sitting on the floor in the end. Hahaaaaa. Funny funny.Then had malay dinner. Which was a whole new experience cuz i ate with my hands! Or rather fingers. Wasnt very glam. And then this sec school came to perform this malay drums thing. And then aft tht a few of the guys came down to pick ppl to go on stage to try out the drums thign with them. Haha and i got picked. So scary, but quite fun. Cuz the drums thing isnt as easy as it lks. It's really heavy! Heh yep. Then spend the night talking about many stuff with jiale, eva, jasmine. So fun. And jasmine has difficultytaking out her contacts! Hahaha was laughing at her.
Then then second day! We had indoor games! And they were surprisingly fun! I was cheering and screaming like crazy. High la high. Haha the three legged balloon minefield was the funnest lah. I paired with Cassy. And she was so hiong, attacking all the way, then i keep reminding her not keep attacking or else we'll be out quite soon. Haha then in the end, it was left with me protecting the balloon tied to my leg, and she attacking. But we got out in the end, and then she finally admitted that we, eh no, that SHE shldnt have kept attacking. Haha attack until my ankle swell. Like pig trotters like that. Haha funny funny. But it was so fun! I want play! Then after that had this etiquette thing workshop. It was okay lah, didnt learn anything also. Then after that it was formal dinner! prepared like crazy. Rushed to bathe, rushed to dress up, rushed to put on make up. Rush rush rush. But it was worth it, cuz everyone look so pretty that night!Whee had class parade! Walked on the red carpet, walked on stage. Had the real dinner, even though it wasnt very nice except the nice cheesecake. Haha! Camwhored like mad back at our room aft formal dinner. Did stupid and scandalous photos. Fun la! BY the time we removed makeup and everythhing it waslike one. Haaaaa.
Day 3. Wah my voice gone alrdy. Eva's worse. Totally hoarse. Sexy voice man! Hahaha. Did our class dance and everything, i felt tht i didnt give my best. Didnt do the moves very well. Hmmmm, but our class won the most gracious class award! YAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY! It was a nice surprise. But the best day of that day wasnt the camp, it was after the camp! Yay. I dont want to elaborate. Only for me to know. Heh climbing all the way up, like 13 floors up the national library is so fun. Even though the scenery isnt very nice, but it was very fun. Haha ahem! And oh my gosh la! TCC at raffles place area is so cool. Must go there again someday okay! Woohoooo. Funfunfun! Haha, rachel ong says i sound like a guy over the phone. Thanks la. My voice got really hoarse and husky hahah. So funny. When my voice hits low pitched notes, i can feel it vibrating. Wah haha. And i was singing at home! Trying out with tht voice. HAAAAA Im insane. Happily insane. Im so much happier than before. So i aint goign to let anyone to take this feelng away from me. Not goign to let some stupid person's comments to take this trust and love i have. Nehneh!

It's a fairytale love, in reality. Thats the best part.

BACK FROM GRACES.

Had career conference for the past two days! Wheee. It was quite slack, but some of the talks were quite pointless, like engineering research, law, hospitality, and even though film making was uh entertaining, it wasnt my cup of tea. I think broadcasting journalism is quite cool! Timothy Go is really a good speaker, considering that hes a channelnews asia presenter, and a famous one too. Hahha plus you dont have to be profound of really gd in your english, you jsut need to be good at talking, my cup of tea for sure. Haha! The hours are crazy though. Hmmm there isnt a perfect job i guess. And the closing speech by Douglas Foo is the best lah, hes so cute! Because he looks so happy with his life and all, and he keep talkign abt his ex girlfriend which is currently his wife -.- Hahah but still! I think he's damn pro, cuz he had 4 jobs aft his a levels, as in together. He gave tuition for the whole of sunday. And thats why he got his very heavy piggybank. Haaaaaa. Cannot stand him lah, hes liek damn clever, CEO of Apex Pal, which has Sake Sushi under him, which meanssssss he set up Sakae Sushi. So coooooooool. And he chose it because his wife likes to eat sushi a lot! So sweet! He's cool, but i guess besides the fact that hes really lucky, he worked hard as well. Wonder why he get all this motivation. Haha! Ah well, and there was this JC talk thing, which doesnt really help me in choosing the subj combination i want. I dont know what to choooooose. The humanities program is really appealing, but if i take that, i have to drop all the sciences, if im not wrong. but i dont want to drop my science! Dont feel secured, cuz if i dont do well for humanities, i have no back up alrdy, Think jasmine feels that way too. Then againnnnnn, i cannot picture myself doign research in science, or being a doctor and what not. I think i cannot make it. Hahah, i prefer planning for stuff, planning for events, talking blahblahblah. People say i look like i do entrepreneur. Really meh, haha. But yeah, i do have an interest in that. And other stuff like broadcasting journalism? Somewhere along the lines. Aiyahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, i dont want to grow up. I want to stop at 17! Yay no alevels, no adult stuff to worry about, no need think about the future, and best of all, i wont grow to look wrinkly and all. i can continue daydream mannnnnn.
Hmm, going graces camp tmr. At times, i feel really excited, for the dance and montage item we've been preparing, for the malay night, for the formal dinner, but at other times, that feel died down in me, because it feels so sian. The afternoon activities and workshops are like not interesting, and the time and effort to put on make up and what not. Thats why im superly looking forward to the end of camp! Wahaha! Yayyyyyy friday! Thats the end of camp! Yay yay yay! :DDDDDDDDDDDD I shall be happy thinking about tht day. Hah! And because i am so bored, i shall do a quiz.

Real name: Rachel
Married: Yeah, totally.
Hair color: Black
Long or short : Mid-length.
Are you a health freak: Haha not exactly, maybe in some ways, a bit.
Height: 162.5!
Do you have a crush on someone: It's a hopeless addiction.
Do you like yourself: Hahah yeah manzxzxxzxzzz.
Piercings: None! Woohoo!
Righty or lefty: Righty :D

FIRSTS :

First surgery: Um P5.

First best friend: Hahah eh p1! Yunching! But i've lost contact with her since 8 years ago ): She migrated.

First award: Awards as in academically or otherwise? Academic wise its K2, HAHA! Others would be P3. Some english story telling competition.

First sport you joined: NETBALL! YAY I LOVE I LOVE!

First pet: Fishes that live and die in one day.

First vacation: Haha i cant rmb!

First concert: No first concert): Not yet anyw, somebody bring me.

First crush: Haha hmmmm p2. But aft that, i was crushless until sec 1 k!

CURRENTLY :

I'm about to: Reply someone called Dan!

YOUR FUTURE :

Want kids: Haha yeah. Kids are so cute!
Want to get married: Hahah yeah. I dont want grow old alone by myself. That would be so sad.
Careers in mind: Good question man!

WHICH IS BETTER?:

Lips or eyes: Both la! Haha.
Hugs or kisses: Both.
Shorter or taller: Taller.
Romantic or spontaneous: Both again! I'm greedy i know.
Nice stomach or nice arms: Haha how to have a nice stomach? I fyou have abs you wont have a stomach, uh right?
Sensitive or loud: Haha sensitive and loud at the right times ma.
Hook-up or relationship: Relationship duh!!!!!
Trouble maker or hesitant: Haha, weird choices.

HAVE YOU EVER :

Kissed a stranger?: Nope.
Drank bubbles: Haha i only tasted it!
Lost glasses/contacts: Hahah no! More like i break my glasses instead.
Ran away from home: No! Im like so guai!
Liked someone younger: Nah. I wont ever like someone younger than me.
Liked someone older: Hahah still do.
Broken someone's heart: No.
Been arrested: Nope!
Turned someone down: Yeah, quite a few times.
Cried when someone died: Uh hmm.
Liked a friend : Eh i like all my friends what?

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

Yourself: Sometimes i dont.
Miracles: Not sure.
Love at first sight: Nope!
Heaven: Haha yeah, i like to imagine how heaven will look like.
Santa claus: I grew up, knowing hes fictional.
Sex on a first date: Of course not! No to pms!
Angels: Yeah(:


ANSWER TRUTHFULLY :

Is there one person you want to be with right now?: Of course!!!
Had more than one boyfriend/ girlfriend at a time?: Nope. Out of the question.
Do you believe in God?: Yes, i love God! Yay!

HAHHAH THIS STUPID CNVERSATION WITH JIALE! She's dumb. She say too happy will harm our body. Read below!

just; says (3:35 PM):
ya lah i agree, quite gd looking xD

My Addiction. THIRTEEEEEEEEEEN! ♥ says (3:35 PM):
;DDDDDD

just; says (3:35 PM):
wah lao. look at u so happy lah
hahaha
My Addiction. THIRTEEEEEEEEEEN! ♥ says (3:36 PM):
hahahhaah aiyahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
emo too logn alrdy
now its pay back time
wohoo
just; says (3:37 PM):
later u overload i tell you. HAHA
you know they say
i saw a tv program
too happy will harm your errr
lungs or liver
HAHA
SERIOUS!
ytd on chnl 8 one!
My Addiction. THIRTEEEEEEEEEEN! ♥ says (3:37 PM):
HAHAHAH JIALE YOU GO AND DIE

just; says (3:38 PM):
HAHAHA REALLLYYY! they say too stressed harm what, then too sad harm what, too happy also got harm one. HAHAHAHA
My Addiction. THIRTEEEEEEEEEEN! ♥ says (3:39 PM):
then we dont live la
go die suan le
just; says (3:39 PM):
yah loh.
but i dont think u wna die now right
HAHA
My Addiction. THIRTEEEEEEEEEEN! ♥ says (3:40 PM):
HAHAH DUH!
why die when i love my current life so much now
hahaha
yay me
just; says (3:40 PM):
ohh mannnn.
just; says (3:41 PM):
you srsly happy overload. HAHA

I tell her, if happy also harm body, sad also harm body, then might as well choose to be happy right! HAHHHHHHHHHH man, i keep disturbing her. Okay shall stop and go do my work alrdy!

I'm loving this love.

1. Would you bang your neighbor?
~ Haha noooooo.

2. What describes your relationship?
~ Sweet and irreplaceable.

4. What's the last movie you saw?
~ Kungfu Dunk;D

5. I've come to realize that the last person who held my hand...
~ Is the love of my life.

6. Whats your middle name?
~ Hmm alyssa? Think its a sweet name!

7. Who have you talked to most today?
~ Most ah, Dan! :P

8. Do you carve pumpkins every year?
~ I havent touch a pumpkin in a million months.

9. Color of your boxers/underwear?
~ Are you expecting me to check? Fine, yellow. Haha.

10. Color of your shirt?
~ Pink.

11. I'm always...
~ missing someone.

12. Who's on speed dial 2?
~ Dont use speed dial!

13. Honestly, how many boys/girls have u been in love with?
~ Honestly? As in reallly really in love? One.

14. Whats your favorite season?
~ Haha anything except winter, even though there's snow, but i hate the idea of bundling myself up until i look like some dumpling. The Sun's so much better.

15. How do you feel right now?
~ Haha happpppppppppy!

19. Would you do anything for a (specific) someone else?
~ Yes, definitely.

20. Have you ever been called a dick?
~ Hahaha noooooooooo. Dickhead maybe, cant rmb. Hahah!

22. What is your ringtone?
~ Um its always on silent mode.

24. Are your grades good?
~ Not really ): Compared to my smartasses friends.

25. Do you hate anyone/anything?
~ Nah.

26. Does your best friend(s) have a myspace?
~ Nope.

28. Last time you went out to lunch?
~ Haha last sunday. Unless you count going school as out to lunch then ytd.

34. Who have you hugged today?
~ Eh nobody! Sadly. I want hugsssssss :P

36. Say you were given a drug test right now. Would you pass or fail?
~ Pass duh. Say nono to drugs.

37. Do you have a song by Ozzy Osbourne in your library?
~ UHHHH whos tht?

42. What's the last thing you bought?
~ I think it was a cup of fruits or smth.

43. What's the last thing someone bought you?
~ Ice cream? Is that counted? Haha.

44. Do you ever sing in the shower?
~ Hahah many a times. I can bunk in with cassy alrdy. We both sing in showers.

45. Whats your favorite movie?
~ Uh many fabourtie movies.

48. Do you believe everyone has a soul mate?
~ Yeah.

49. Can you sing?
~ I'm suddenly doubting if i can sing, like sing well. It's like i dont think i can really sing that well anymore. Sucks.

54. Have you ever been to South America or Africa?
~ No, dont intend to go there.

55. Do you know how to knit?
~ No.

56. Do you have a job?
~ Nope. But i want! For the fun of it. Haha!

58. What are you doing right now besides this survey?
~ Haha thinkinggggggggggggg :PPPPPPP

60. Baskin Robbins or Coldstone?
~ Baskin Robbins duh!

61. Physics or chemistry?
~ BIOLOGY!

62. Facebook or Myspace?
~ Facebook.

63. Do you wear any jewelry?
~ Not really. I'm so guai.

65. G's or R's?
~ R's!

66. Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, or Star Wars?
~ Harry Potter. Dont like wars.

67. Fly or road trip?
~ FLY! But road trips are fun too!

68. Batman, Spiderman, or Superman?
~ Spideyyyyy.

69. What's your favorite Disney movie?
~ Haha can't decide!

70. What are your plans for tonight?
~ Eat, go home, watch tv.

71. What about this weekend?
~ Study study more studying.

72. What's a goal you want to achieve?
~ To get above 80% overall on my report book at the end of the year. Go me! (although it'll never happen, but ah well)

73. Do you throw good parties?
~ HMMMMMMM, do i even throw parties?

74. what did u do today?
~ I read the papers, i ate, i think, i miss.

75. Last text in your inbox, and from who?
~ Heh i dont even need to chek, its from dannnnnnie! ;D Content is strictly meant for me only.

I gained super many calories today. Thanks to someone! Hahah, but i dont care. The ice cream was sooooooo nice! And so sweet, ahem. Hahha. And i'm happppppppy! Super happy, over the moon! Like really really happy! Hahah, oh man going mad alrdy. Waited so long lah, and it's like finally. And it was so fun! And even though I'm going to die waiting for another 7 days, I will still wait, while whining away though. Because it's worth waiting for!
Today was brain overload. School is like crazy. Bah. No time to eat, no time to pee, no time to poo. Thanksssssss. Couldnt eat because had to meet teacher during recess, and had to do chinese compo during lunch. Couldn't pee because there was no time, its just lessons, lunch, then lessons. Couldnt poo, best part. From ytd ah, want to poo, but i was telling myself need to do work, so cannot. Then wait until dont want poo. Until the next day, want to poo, but cannot, too much work to finish. So sad lah. Had to wait until end of the whole day. Okay haha, nvm. I'm just trying to make my point how horrid school is. Until now, we still have to rush out the srq so tht we can send Ms Seb the essay WHICH IS MARKED FOR CA?! Wth. And she never tell us until today. Well done. So even though, im like so tired. I still have to do some crap essay. Idiot laaaaa i want my sleep. Information overload today. My only fun and relax time was in the afternoon. My favourite moment for the entire day, eh no, week!
Andddd haah stupid yueling. I think she and regine too free. Can disturb lili everyday also not sian. Still set up some blog just for the evil sec 1s. Lame la, but I'm very curious as to wht they can post there. Childish people. But haha, my juniors lah. I shall be nice and say tht I miss you guys. Lunch lunch lunch! Oh i jsut found out their blog. Wah i shall be even nicer and help them change their blogskin. Hah when i'm free, which will be like june hols. They can slowly wait.
Hah! Dan's abs are so scary. So hard but he claims they are not hard -.- But so cool lah. Poke poke poke them. Heheh!

I need sleeeeeeeeeep. ):

There's something about me and quizzes. I'm just bored, so might as well do them!

1.Were you smiling when you woke up this morning?
` Heh yes!

2.When was the last time you met someone new?
` Haha like last month?

3.When did you last eat chocolates?
` Oh your reminded me! I shall go eat them now ;D

4.Do you drink beer?
` Nah.

5.Do you wash your own clothes?
` I live in a world where washing machinese exist.

6.Are you any good at poker?
` Hahah maybe!

7.What do you want more than anything?
` I wannnnnnnnnnnnt friday!

8.Are you tired?
` Notr really(:

9.Besides your bed, what is your favorite thing in your room?
` My wardrobe?

10.Pepsi or Coke?
` Fruit juice can not?

11.Would you ever take someone back if they cheated on you?
` Definitely not. Out!

13. bk or McDonald's?
` Macs.

14.Are you restless?
` Right now? Nope!

15.Is your computer desktop or a laptop?
` Desktop.

17.Want to be a prince or princess?
` I would want to be someone's princess

18.Do you believe that dreams come true?
` Dreams? Uh realistic dreams. Haha oxymoron!

19.Last song you heard?
` Whenever You Remember - Carrie Underwood.

ROUND 2

1) Is it obvious when you're mad?
` Uh, i can't hhide my emotions really well.

2.) Who is the person that makes you smile?
` Eh hehhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

3.) Are you a mysterious person?
` Not really!

4.) One thing that you can do for everyday?
` I think about things :p

5.) Things about yourself that your friends complain on?
` That I'm too loud. Haha.

6.) Movies that can make you relax?
` A definite nono to horror.

7.) What do you do when you had a fight with your parents?
` I just do my stuff, or else i'll ended up being targetted as well.

8.)Post paid or pre-paid?
` Eh>

9.) You are interested in?
` Someoneeeeeeeeeee :D

10.) You scared of cockroaches??
` Yes. They are sooooo ew.

11.) Whos the last person you had a fist fight with?
` Hahah! No one!

12.) Which do you enjoy more, food trip or sound trip??
` Wah they both appeal to me.

13.)Recent activity?
` Swimming! Yay!

14.) Do you go out alot?
` Considerably no.

15.) What are you feeling right now?
` Happy! More than happy!

16.) Are you nice?
` Of course! Hahah!

17.) What will you do later?
` Study, finish up reports and what not.

18.) Where were u earlier?
` School then the pool.

19.) Who are you with?
` Haha now that's an interesting question.

ROUND 3.

The last thing you did last night?
` Um, i messaged Dan! Heh.

Have you said "I love you" today?
` Yep! :D

What are the things u will do the next day?
` Go school play a fool. Hahah, study lah.

How do you calm down when your extremely angry?
` I talk to someone.

A movie or a long walk on the beach on a date?
` Both.

Would you ever date someone covered in tats and piercings?
` NO! Outoutout!

Would you want a house at the beach or in the mountains?
` Hahah IN the mountains?! IN?! At the beach la!

What are 2 of your favorite colors?
` Haha i dont knw how to choose.

What time is it now?
` 7.01. I smell fooooood!

Heheh. Fridayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! A week should only contain friday and weekends. Good idea! :D Hahah, ytd was damn funny. I caught Lili red-handed! Haha oranges ah oranges. Dumbbbbb, dno how she even think of such things. Plant images in my mind only, haha! Blahhh then had conversations about the poms-poms and what not. Laugh like crazy. Fun fun! Then played tennis with lili too! Haha had long rallies. And we were playing on the space behind the tennis courts since they were not avaliable. Sadly, the sun wasn't that strong, cannot make use of the chance to suntan ):
I swam today! Whee, finally. Felt damn shuang when i was swimming cuz the water was so nice! And there were not many people. Only some guys around. Hahhhh and it didnt rain! Ahem! :p Lala some evil person was wishing it would rain so i won't swim. So nice to me! Hahaha, wellll only until now then it seems like it's going to start raining. Heeeeeeeeeee. Oh no, i'm really a bit not right in the mind already. Hmm 402 must jiayou for graces! Kop all the awards! Whee, even though it's not possible but it's a goal! Tadahhhh.

Wheeeeee! I'm going insane! Happily insane! Hahah, oh nooooooo. But i don't care! Because i like this feeling now. And it feels so much btr to be happy than emo, duh right? Heheh. Tadah! And even though i know next week is going to be a not so good week, there's still smth to look forward to! So that's another thing to be happy about!

Love Me
Collin Raye

I read a note my Grandma wrote back in 1923
Grandpa kept it in his coat, and he showed it once to me
He said, "Boy, you might not understand, but a long, long time ago,
Grandma's daddy didn't like me none, but I love your Grandma so.

We had this crazy plan to meet and run away together
Get married in the first town we came to and live forever
But nailed to the tree where we were supposed to meet instead
I found this letter, and this is what it said :

"If you get there before I do
Don't give up on me
I'll meet you when my chores are through
I don't know how long I'll be

But I'm not gonna let you down
Darling wait and see
And between now and then
Til I see you again

I'll be loving you
Love Me."

I read those words just hours before my Grandma passed away
In the doorway of the church where me and Grandpa stopped to pray
I know I've never seen him cry in all my fifteen years
But as he said these words to her, his eyes fill up with tears

This is such a sweet song! The kind of song that can almost make your heart melt. Hah! Okay i shall end here and do some proper work. Till then!

1. How many people have you kissed in this month on the lips?
Nobody!

2. What's your middle name?
Still thinking of one. Alyssa seems to be one of the best choices so far.

3. Would you rather spend a whole day with your mum or your dad?
Mum, but then againnnnn! Haha nvm.

4. Where will you be 12 hours from now?
At home.

5. Is it easy for others to make you feel sad?
Yeah, sadly. Haha too emotional.

6. Do you know what you are going to wear tomorrow?
Uh hmm! tee skirt shoes.

7. Wheres your girlfriend/boyfriend at?
Hahaha, good question!

8. Why did your last relationship end?
Because! There's someone out there thats meant for me instead!

9. Does anyone hate you for no reason?
Hmmm not sure about that. You can't please everyone.

10. Can you make yourself cry?
Hahah hmmmm, if i keep things inside me too long, then yes.

13. Would u prefer chocolates or marshmallows?
Chocolates! Marashmallows get boring, unless you dipped them in chocolate! Wheee.

14. What are your favorite color(s)?
I love colours in general.

15. Have you ever kissed someone whose name starts with an R?
Rachel ong! Yep, on the cheek! Shes the only one i kissed on the cheek before besides my family.

16. What are you doing tomorrow?
Church, study, study, studyyyyyyyyyyy.

17. Are you easily confused?
Hahah yesssss! People like to confuse me, on purpose.

18. Do you think you would make a good wife/husband?
Hahah hmmmmmmm. That's not for me to judge, that would be my husband to be's opinion. But i shall strive to be a good one!

19. What's your favorite kind of ice cream?
COOKIESn'CREME! LOVELOVELOVE!

20. Are you tall?
I'm not tall, not short.

21. Have you ever liked someone who treated you like crap?
Hahaha doesn't matter.

22. Is your current hair color mostly your natural hair color?
All natural, and i'm proud of it!

23. What is you sock's colour?
White, turning yellow.

24. Has anyone ever borrowed something?
Fei hua.

25. Do you fall for people who jokes easily?
How you fall for jokes? But anyw, yes.

26. Everything happens for a reason?
Haha at least almost everything i guess?

27. Do you like someone more than a friend?
Now? Of course!

28. Who have you texted in the last 2 days?
DANNNNNNNNN:D

29. What are you listening to right now?
Love Me - Collin Raye

30. How has the week been?
Not good. Except ytd. Next week will be even worse. Just wait and see.

31. Is there something you wish you could tell someone but cant?
Not really, i normally blurt out what i want to say.

Surprising how time really heals wounds. But it's true, although it sounds cheesy or cliche. I used to think that my heart will stay broken, used to think that I will wait, used to think that even as time passes, I will remain that way. But I'm glad. Glad that time has passed, glad that I've moved on, glad that from now on, my life is more complete and even happier than it used to be, of course i wld have to thank a special smone for that, that will be another story :D! And yeah, I'm even glad that he hurt me so badly so as to give up completely, glad that he was heartless, because I learned a lot of things from that. Nope, it's not that i'm still thinking of the past, or hanging on to it. I'm saying these because I'm happy! Like really happy that I've gone and make the right choice, and happy cuz of what i've falled into! Heheh! Woohooooooo. I also realised that i've been saying i'm happy. Because, i really am! On cloud nineeeeee!

Today's got to be the best day of this week! Im sure tmr or sunday cant be compared to today! Whee, first off! The lessons are slack and it's short, we had like another talk early in the morning on wht dresses we shld buy and all, and get to see wingyau on stage modelling off a dress! Hahaha her hair is pretty! And then we had rly slack lessons like er math, chinese and bio. Aft lunch it was student's investiture! Oh gosh, jasmine and I was grumblign away. Haha she's worse than me please. Keep makign cynical and sacarstic remarks. So funny. But oh well, at least the montage has the photos i took during last yr PSL's camp! Got our face! Wahah. I'm comforting myself. Hehe. Trng was okay, i think the time i took to run/do situps is longer than the time in court. Whee, and then the best part! Heh shall not disclose too much information. Bu neng shuo de mi mi! Heheh :D But i must be besotted or smth. Haha in love with love! Ladeedum. And now, i'm like really very happy! Feel like singing. Hahah! Oh no, i'm going mad mad madddd. Even though i've so many things to do at hand, and i know i really should finish them.

And it's a permanent fall, deep right in.
Annnd, I don't want to stop myself.

Balancing the whole thing,
Of times words get tangled in lines.
Songs I'll sing with love,
while the lyrics never mumble.

Wheee finally have time to blog. The two previous nights were like shit, but Monday's one was like the worst. But felt better because of a certain accompaniment :DDD!
Anyway, monday school was so funny, because I only played like 10 mins of tennis, and spend the rest of the time talking to Eva, Lili and Shi ing. We were playing those kiddy hand games that was once played during primary school time. How i miss those days! Anyway, we were like quite high during pe lah, but the people around us lk so sian ): And Lili taught me this song which got stuck in both of our heads. I think she almost gave up teaching me. Haha it's a retarded but cute song anyw! Heheh. Yesterday was boring, except for the Buddha jump over the wall joke. HAHA! Blah today was sian. But luckily assembly made up for it, even though it was kind of boring, but at least got time to slack :DDDDD And there weren't math today! Yay! The global classroom programme for the end of years are so temptingly good! The places like Australia, Canada, UK, US, Switzerland and Sweden. But no money, all spend on the dresses and what not for this year alrdy. ): Haha oh welllllllll, at least got Jiale and Eva to pei me! WEP here we go!
I've been feeling over the moon these days, even though I am having serious lack of sleep. But I don't feel as tired I should feel. Hahahaaaaaaaaaaa! But i want to swimmmmm. And i suddenly feel like going to the the playground and play swing! But go alone a bit sad ah.
Anyway, there's no time! The teachers are horrid. They pile work on us, give us deadlines that perpetually clash with our exams? Smart move please. Plus, given that we are supposed to work on our projects and study for our exams before T2 starts, which should be like around this time, they have to happily tell us to prepare for a song/dance and montage item for the Graces camp within a short period of time. Wah even though im excited and i dont really mind preparing for the camp, i still dont liek the idea of the projs and exams dates clashing together. Block tests smmore. I want my common tests backkkkkkkk. GRAH. I shall stop complaining, i sound so whiny. Bah, im finally done with my design the booklet thing. I don't know why i actually bother to do so much jsut for the design, haha stupid wingyau said, "Anyhow do lah, who bothers to look at the camp booklet design anyw?!" That was so encouraging man. But aiyah heck, I shall bother to look and admire the design :DDDDDD

Melting under blue skies, Belting out the Sunlight.
Just you and me.

Smittened.

Sugar rush, and by that i mean the sweetness of the sugar. Heheh.These few days are really happy days. Let's make this last! :D
Okay, besides that point. I really need to get started with my work. It's goign to increase if i don't start doign them. So many reports to do and finished. I should stop complaining and do them. Actions speak louder than words. Blah, even though words are really powerful. Hahah okay nvm. EVA JIALE WINGYAU JIAQI JASMINE ADELINE! CHINESE AND IH! Dieeeeeeee, its due next week, which is like tmr onwards. There's going to be a serious lot of lack of sleep for us already. Blah. I shall do a quiz, because!

Do you know where your sister is right now?
Out with my cousins.

What colour is your watch?
Red and black!

Do you like anyone?
Yes please, a loooot.

Do you know of anyone who likes you?
Haha yeah :D

What is the name of your school?
Ny.

What are you listening to right now?
Not listening to anything.


What is/are your favorite coluor/s?
i love colours! Ranging from white to orange to green to red to black to brown, okay you get the idea :p

Closest thing to your right?
The really pretty bouquet of flowers!

What t-shirt are you wearing?
Normal tee.

Do you have a brother?
Yep!

Time you were born?
Uh i need to check.

Do you know anyone who is engaged?
Hmmm no, not that i know of.

Whats your favorite number?
Numbers like 1,3,4!15!7,9.

Do you know someone named Adrian?
I think so.

What colour is your mom's hair?
Dyed brown black.

Do you have a dog?
Nah.

Do you remember singing any songs as a kid?
Yes, i love singing ever since i was small! :D

What were you doing at 11.30am today?
I was making my way to a house party!

When was the last time you talked to one of your siblings?
Haha an hour ago.

Miss anyone?
Yeah ): A lot at that too.

Do you like fire, wind or water?
Heh fire, wind annnnd water.

Are you allergic to anything?
I don't think so!

When was the last time you cried?
Long ago, i can't rmb. Which is a happy thing :D

Do you like butterflies?
Haha when they are stationary yes, cuz you get to admire them.

What is the one thing you miss about your past?
I don't miss anything much abt the past. I like my present life.

Have you ever seen your school principal?
Yes -.-

Have you ever wanted to be a teacher?
Haha yeah, but now nah, too stressful.

Are you jealous of anyone?
I don't think so.

Is anyone jealous of you?
i don't think so either! I got nothing to be jealous about.

Ever been stuck in an elevator?
Yeah once or twice.

Ever been in love?
Hmm thinking back, it didnt really felt like it.

What does your sibling/s call you?
Jia wei. My sister is damn polite man.

What does your friends call you?
Rachel.

What does your hair look like right now?
A bit wet.

Has a friend ever used you?
Haha yeah, sadly.

Has anyone recently told you that they like or love you?
Hahahaha! Heh like uh hmm! :DDDD

Do you want to leave a message to anyone?
Huh? Uh i don't know. No?

How old were you when you first gotten into fight?
I'm a good girl, i don't get into fights.

Are you close with your siblings?
Hmmm we could be closer i guess.

Where were you yesterday?
Home, novena church, orchard, home. My life is exciting.

I'm dying from happiness :D

And i thought ytd was a happy enough day. Today was just the very best, so much btr than yesterday! Really, 15th feb! Because seriously, no one has ever gone to such great lengths to like um do all these, and for me. All the things given and done and thought. So i was basically really surprised. Actually more than that, but eh you don't have to know the details. Yay so really thank you to that special someone out there who has make today especially memorable!
Yesterday was Valentines! Yay got a brownie from Eva, and then kajiao her until she gave me this really cute clip thing! Then then i received this heart shaped note from Jas. And i was happily writing last min notes to some ppl in class, but it makes me happy to give out sweets and chocs to people. And i got a surprise during recess, because Jodie left a rose and chocolates on my table! And Melwee's letter! Totally unexpected. And i really love them! Andddd kaiyu elaine and cy. Nice sweet people. But of course, I know of like even more sweet ppl, ahem. Hahah ;p So let me show you some random pictures:

CLASSROOOOOOOOM :D


PRESENTS!

And there are actually some more, but I don't wish to show. It's for me to see only! Heheh.

HAPPY BELATED VALENTINES DAY! LOVELOVELOVE!

Hahah today was a happy day because school seems short and the lessons are slacker than usual :DDD We were learning how to fold flowers during recess! Whee pretty flowers. Some looks like tulips and sunflowers, though its supposed to look like roses. But they are all still very pretty! Im going to fold many many! Anddddd had a retarded but funny conversation with Lili, Wingyau amd Stef. Even though we were supposed to talk about IH stuff but eh sidetracked, like always. Haha oh well, thats why school is fun with people like them. Or else i'll be bored to death. Yesterday went swimming, and it was quite uh freaky. Partly due to the fact that i was the only girl in one of the pools, plus one auntie lah. But she was jacuzzi-ing, so technically speaking, I was like swimming with the many uncles around me. Hahhhhhhhhhhh.
And i never knew there are people, who reads my blog. Like unexpected. Haha people like REGINEEEEEEE. And Yueling. Ahem. The juniors ah, are scary people who likes to stalk their beloved PSL. And i know they are reading this. Haha, and they bully meeee. Thanks la thanks. But i love them and 1o2! Cute class, and the only class I'm closest with out of the 3 years where I took the Sec One classes :D Wheee!

When the Sun rises, there you'll be.

DAN IS EVILLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!
AND I KNOW YOU'RE READING THIS :DDDD

haha before i go stagnant on my blog (again), i shall jsut post a quiz, because i like the musical note! So cute ;D

01. In one word, describe yesterday:
♫ Fun, i like!

02. What made you smile today?
♫ A lot of things made me smile today(:

03. What were you doing at 8:00am?
♫ I was uh, REFERRING to ppl's work.

04. What were you doing 15 minutes ago?
♫ I was online, still is.

05. Something that happened to you in 1995?
♫ I was 3 yrs old. I think i was at PAP. Haha.

06. Last thing someone said to you? now?
♫ Uh smth about if a guy comes aft you, your story is about to unfold. HAHAH! Don't ask.

07. What was your answer?
♫ What my story? This question is like dumb.

08. Worst thing currently on television:
♫ The China programmes. Awful song smmore.

09. What was in your e-mail today?
♫ Spam.

10. How many different beverages have you drank today?
♫ 1.

11. What is your favorite part of this day?
♫ Night!

12. Your current To-Do list?
♫ Go sleep.

13. Where is your best friend right now?
♫ Sleeping maybe?

14. What color is your toothbrush?
♫ Pink!

15. What are you wearing right now?
♫ Tee and shorts?

16. Any plans for Friday night?
♫ The questions are getting more and more boring. Anyway, nope.

17. Favorite place to shop?
♫ Town

18. Things you bought today?
♫ Food.

19. Last gift you received?
♫ Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, haha let me think abt that.

20. Who gave you that?
♫ I dont know.

21. What made you sad today?
♫ Nothing made me sad today. Which is gooooood.

22. What can make you happy?
♫ A lot of things make me happy, easily.

23. Are you happy with your life?
♫ Yeah, i guess so :D

27. What are you thinking now?
♫ Haha nothing in particular. Brain's dying soon.

28. Who do you trust the most?
♫ Trust is a very strong word. i think, it's easy to gain my trust, but it's hard to gain it back once you do something wrong. Oooh i rmb i said this to Wingyau today! (:

29. What day is it today?
♫ Monday ): Friday please come quick.

30. What are you going to do after this?
♫ SLEEEEEP. I NEED SLEEP!

31. What do you want most?
♫ This needs a lot of brain cells to answer. So im skipping it!

32. What do you look forward to tomorrow?
♫ To be in the mood to swim!

33. Anything exciting to look forward to in the next two weeks?
♫ No. It's just going to get more busy.

34. One word to describe your current mood.
♫ Happy. But blank. So blankly happy. haha!

35. Honestly, do you want to seesomeone this very moment?
♫ Heh maybe!

Today was not as horrible as we thought. There were supposed to be like 3 quizzes, then the teachers were nice to let us off. Wheeeee. But it was still very sian. Wanted to go home badly lah. Boooo. But in between we have stupid and random conversations like, lili asking me if i can flutter my eyelashes quickly, because apparently, she cant do that! Haha! She has super inflexible eyelids! Then Wingyau said to Lili "Awww. Now you can't flirt with that." And Lili was like "You mean you flirt with that?!?!?" HAHAHAH. Damn funny. Andandanddddd jas and jiale was saying my bday very easy to rmb. Yayyyyyyyyyyyy thank you lah, i know im well loved. Haha! :D But they dont know why very easy to rmb. Ladum. Its okay, can rmb can already!

Copying people's way of blogging, and rippiing of their pictures and all is so last year. You can choose to be a poser all you want, i'm just wondering why you've changed to someone I don't even know from the last two and a half years. It's foolish to want the old you back, because it's impossible. And I really don't want to bother about you anymore, but it kinda stings to know that a friend was so close to me as changed to this stranger.

On another note, I better start to work and study already. I realised I have so many things undone. Best lah best. So cut down on the blogging, cut down on msning, cut down on using the computer basically ): Oh well.

Hahah oh shit oh shit oh shit. Im smiling like an idiot in front of the computer. I think i'm crazy. Hahah! But I can't help it. Excuse me while i go warm down my cheeks. :p

Watched Ah Long Pte Ltd today! Haha it was okay lah, not the laugh until can peng type of movie, but mark lee was hilarious. Must hand it to him, hahaha. As usual, i was bullied by this very nice person, i shan't say who ;DDD Pulling and dragging at far east. So glam! Hahah so stupid but great fun. And even more fun, if it wasnt at my expense ;p And then i was questioned ok! Haha wah nearly died. I don't blush. But errrrr, i feel blushed lah, if you can used it tht way. Hahaha! Feeling blushed is like cuz of shy or the embarrassment. Yeah but eh nvr blush, really really :D
Anyway! I have like so much work undone. Best man. Got quiz here and there tmr. Wah my brain die already. I don't feel like preparing for anything, cuz im so tired. Didn't sleep well ytd. Oh oh and my ah gong say i look pretty in contacts! Heheh, but he say don't wear too often, later not good for the eyes, blahblahblah a lot of long stories already. Tomorrow better come quick and end quick. Cuz i can run and burn off the fats, must have gained liek a gazillion calories over cny ): Fatfatfat ): and quickly end the day, cuz there are disgusting tests and hmwork to finish and wht not. Bah.

Why do i try so hard? No, why do i even try? F. pissed.
I dont know why im pissed. I've no right to be pissed, and there's not much reason why i should be pissed. So i shouldn't be pissed. But why do i still feel pissed? Okay i'm being rubbishy.

And i really don't get what you're thinking. So do i choose to believe or not?

This is going to be my 400th post! Yay. Hmm there's lovely weather today. SO WHY ARE THE SWIMMING POOLS CLOSED?!?! Grah, i want to swim. Boooooooooooooooooooo. I'm bored and rotting at home. i don't want study anymore lah. So sian. Teachers are crazy, they think we don't have cny parties or gatherings to go to. Whole day just stay at home and duefully do their homework meh? Bah.
Haha was trying to familiarise myself with the two songs chosen to sing at the camp ytd night. And lili, eh no, HOOIHOOI, was being her dumdum usual self. Hah! She started calling me CHICHI or RACHI first. I have no idea how she think of such things. Haha stupid hooihooi. If you're reading this, which i think you are, go find nice english songs tht we can dance to leh! I think the chinese songs not very suitable for a class item. Not very 402-ish, and choose all chinese songs, sure a lot of protests by the people. Okay ah? :D

I've tried to fix this, but now i'm glad it remained broken.

Unswayed by the words spoken sweet.

.
And wtf is wrong with me.
Because, to love is a tiring thing. And i don't want to go through the whole painful process again. So even if i ever want to start a relationship, i need to think. Cuz i need to be sure that it will be a steady guy who knows me. Hahhhhhhhhh, like real i will think. I listen to my heart more than my brain. Which sucks. And all the waiting is tiring. I really really reallllllllly need to sit down, and just wait for the special someone out there to come to me. I dont feel like doing anything, not just yet. I much rather to be single and wait, then to be with someone who doesnt give me the security i need.
But then again, i don't know. Haha shit. I'm going insane. I am like so pessimistic, and yet now i don't really feel that bad. Wah must be the night that's doing me in. Better sleep soon, or else my imagination will just go wild all over again. Boooooo.

.
I feel so sian ): Feel like sleeping. Wonder what i should do tmr. Maybe i should do my work or something. Oh man i want go out. Somebody can ask me out since dear jiale and co are going to do a nice project together for the weekends. Sheesh. Ah whatever, don't want to blog anymore.

The wait and the hope for it to come to me first, is enough to kill.

I'm on a Quiz Kind of Mood. So there will be many quizzes ;D

1. You're a girl, right?
No i'm a guy. Really.

2. Have you kissed any one on your top list?
HAD

4. Do you enjoy drama?
Just a little(;

5. Are you a girly girl?
Haha not really. But uh maybe.

6. Who was the last person you hugged?
Melanie. This morning. Haha.

7. Small or large purses?
Not too small, not too big please.

8. Are you short?
Haha I used to be the taller ones! now i'm just average. Boohoo.

9. Do you like someone?
;D

11. Do you care if your socks are dirty?
Uh hahah okay yes.

12. Do you think you’re conceited?
Sometimes I tend to be a little

13. Do you dress up on Halloween?
No ):

14. Are you double jointed?
huh?

15. Where is the weirdest place you have slept?
Im not the type of person who can sleep easily at any position or anywhere. Haha ;D

16. Has anyone touched/smacked your butt in the past 24 hours?
Yes

17. Is there any type of rumor going around about you?
If there is, i don't care.

18. Do you call anybody by their last name?
Haha yep!

19. How many guys will read this?
I think hardly any guy will read this.

20. What color bra are you wearing?
i'm not wearing any Hmm, white.

21. Do you prefer light or dark haired guys?
Uh black?

22. Are you currently frustrated with a boy?
Uh hahaha not exactly.

23. Do you have a best friend?
Yes, the very best(:

24. Have you ever had your heart broken?
Yeah. I'm glad its not that broken now.

25. Have you ever thought of having plastic surgery?
NOOOOOOOOO.

26. Do you like your life?
It's better(:

27. Has one of your friends ever stolen a boyfriend from you?
No, and hopefully never in the future.

28. Have you ever jumped in the pool with your clothes on?
I was pushed in!!

29. Do you have more friends that are girls or boys?
Definitely.

30. How long have you had fs?
Friendster? Uh i couldn't even rmb creating an acc with it.

31. Have you ever slapped a boy in the face?
Nah. Not that mean.

32. What are your biggest fears?
Disappointment, Loss and the list goes on. Haha.

33. Have you ever cried yourself to sleep?
Yeah, too many a times last year.

34. Have you ever not been able to get someone off of your mind?
Uh hmmm.

35. Have you ever had a good feeling about something?
Haha yes ;DDD

36. Do you ever wish you were famous?
I fantasize about it. But now, i know i don't want to be famous.

37. Are you currently missing someone?
Maybe ;p

---------------------------------------

THIS GUY OR THAT GUY?

Cowboy or Gangster?
Can i just choose a normal guy?

Preppy or Punk?
Eeee none!

Face or Body?
Haha character. Okay fine, maybe a little to the body.

Sweet or Sexy?
Sweet, definitely.

Well-educated or Dropout?
Well-educated duh.

Armani or Abercrombie?
Anythingggggg.

Contacts or glasses?
BOTH! ;D Depends lah!

Turn away from Sin, and be faithful to the Gospel.

Sitting on the ledge, watching the clouds go by.

Too tired, i fell asleep. Haha and i was really watching the clouds go by, literally. Too bored already. But the clouds were pretty!
Anyway, today was just another day. Calligraphy was sucky. Haha, at least last year i managed to write one dui lian out and proudly hang it at home for display. This year, i wrote the first half of the duilian, and gave up. Oh well. Then had another guitar/song session in class. Yay. Then we were waiting for the cny concert to start, and cherie suggested playing Cissy/SeeSee/Sissy My baby! Haha whatever you call it. And it was damn funny, cuz we have to make this monkey face. And Cheria and Lili ended up laughing at me, haha!! Hey at least i won ;D Anyway, school ended at 10.30. Ohmygosh, i swear school celebrations are ending earlier every year! When i was sec 1, it ended around 12. Sec 2 it was 11.30plus. Last year, it was before 11.30. Now its 10.30. Getting pathetic man.
I'm afraid of the words said, afraid of the lie-made truth. You got me stumbling down, and now I don't know what I should do.

Yes i really need to do my essay but heh. Felt like doing a quiz so here goes:

1. Last person you had a deep and meaningful conversation with?
- Uh hahha, that would be long ago. Deep and meaningful are hardly a type of conversation to go for at school.

2. What does the 10th message in your inbox say?
- Im lazy to check ;p

4. Pick 1 person/thing you trust with your life?
- My mum.

5. what was the last thing you ate?
- Jelly!

6. What was the last thing you highlighted?
- I think it would be this curve on the graph on my math notes.

7. Who is the last baby that you held?
- I haven't hold a baby in ages ):

8. Do you know of any twins with rhyming names?
-Haha hmm lets see. Nope.

9. Are you ticklish?
- Yes, very.

10. Have you ever worn a crown?
- Hahah think i did. When i was small.

11. Last time you've seen fireworks?
- During the New Year this year.

12. Who is the last person that left you a text message?
- Dannnnnnn.

13. Do you have a black dog?
- No dogs.

14. Do you have a little black dress?
- Haha yes! ;D Pretty pretty.

15. What colour is your underwear?
- Hahah! Don't tell you.

16. Who was the last person you talked to on the phone?
- My dad.

18. Are you missing someone?
- ;DDD

19. Reason behind why you last cried?
- I last cried long ago. So i can't rmb!

20. How much cash do you have on you?
- 5bucks in my wallet.

25. How many rolls of film do you need to get developed?
- Uh wo bu zhi dao.

26. If you had to choose between a million bucks or to be able to change a major regret which would you choose?
- If i rmb correctly, i don't regret anything. I don't wish to change anythign in the past, kind of meaningless. So a million bucks ;DDD ka ching!

27. What’s on your mind right now?
- I want to sleep.

28. Do you have one deep dark secret?
- Hmm nope! ;D

29. Wouldn't you rather be having sex right now?
- HAHAHA. NOOOOOOOO.

30. Who was the hottest teacher you ever had?
- Never had a hot teacher. Good thing too. hot teachers are almost always nvr good.

31. What was the last thing you ever got grounded for?
- I don't get grounded!

33. Do you have any strange phobias?
- Yesssss. Uh maybe not strange luh.

35. Are your parents married/separated/divorced?
- Married.

36. What did you fear was going to get you at night as a child?
- About everything! Ghosts spirits and blahblah.

37.When you are old enough are you getting any tattoos?
- No!!! So gross!

38. Is there anybody/anything you just wish would fall off the planet?
- Nope. Even if i don't like anyone, it'it'll never be to tht extent.

39. Do you crack your knuckles?
- Used to. Until my friend tells me that it'll make my knuckles grow hugeeee. I was horrified.

40. What's one thing that can always be found in your refrigerator?
- Eggs.

41. What colour are your bed sheets?
- Purple! It's the Mickey Mouse one ;DDD I like!

42. How many kids do you plan having?
- Haha soccer team! Nahhhhhhh tht's crazy. Actually, i dont have any plans yet.

43. If you could kiss anyone who would it be?
- Haha good question.

44. How would you rather die?
- Peacefully, with the least amount of pain as possible.

45. Have you ever been in love?
- I had.

46. When is the last time you went out of the state?
- December, to KL.

47. Have you ever had a true one-night stand?
- No!!!! Yucks, i'll never do that.

48. What would you spend a million dollars on?
- I'd save some, spend some, give some.

49. We are all human, do you think we judge someone for a past indiscretion?
- We do, but we shouldnt. The past is the past. We all have it.

50.Generally, in life, what makes you happy?
- Love. As in generally love.

Had bad leg cramps ytd night. Imust have woke up at least 3 or 4 times with leg cramps. I have no idea why! So many times until it feels like im dreaming of them, and not actually having them. Wingyau assured me it wasnt a dream. Haha.
Just came back home from swimming. The water was freezing cold man. But anyway, i felt like swimming more but uh, didnt, haha! i need to swim to burn off the fats and calories from all the pineapple tarts i've been gorging myself on lah. I was telling wingyau how i ate 4 of them a day, and its like some routine. She told me she herself also eat 4 a day! ;DDD yay hi 5! Haha, thats why im determined not to succumb to the temptation of eating those evil pineapple tarts today. Or else later cnt fit into my dress. And i still cannot decide wht dress i shld wear. Hmmm.

It's been quite fun today during school anyw. Cuz we have a lot of sing-along sessions in class! My gosh, we shld really have singing sessions everyday in school, cuz singing and playing the guitar makes us happy. Thats what i did first thing in the morning. Jasmine and Jiale were happily playing the guitar when i stepped into class, and they almost immediately called me to sing Over You. Yay my turn to influence Jasmine and Eva into this song. Wheee ;DDD Jas got the song stuck in her head since ytd. Hahaha!! And Eva was soooooooooooo funny. She has a deep and sexy voice man! I was singing Over You for the dont know how many times as i walk to LT, then she started singing too, in her unusually low voice. I swear it was so amusing, i couldnt stop laughing. But its unique lah eva. You can be our base ;D Fun fun! I want to hear Eva sing again!! For self-amuse purposes ;D Heheh. I have My Sister's Keeper in my hands! Wahah, from wingyau. I shall like read and read and read. Everybody says its nice! Andandand i think i need a new bag. Hahah I have no idea why my mum says i have a lot of bags when i only have one for school and one for going out. I need another one for going out and school ;D I shall keep wishing.
And I can't wait to watch Kungfu Dunk! Or the Jack Neo movie. Stephen Chow's movie looks so kiddish! But the alien in his movie was so so so super cute! ;p Okay i better stop myself. And complete tht stupid ih essay already ):

Dee Dee Dum.

Our First Ever Class Photo Together!
402! MWAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!




I look so happy being boxed by Lili. Haha. But i love this picture though! Everyone looks so happy ;D

I totally slacked my ass off during the weekends. Esp Sunday. Haha thanks ah thanks. The fav words of ytd: Thanks ah Thanks. Damn funny. And i got forced to try dresses, which was liek embarassing! Cuz i normally only buy/tryout clothes with my mum. Tsk thanks ah Dan, thanks. Haha okay i shall stop this dumbdumb thanky thing. And i love the esplanade! It's so quiet and peaceful. One day, i shall go there at night. And hopefully it wouldnt be raining. And whee CNY is coming! i'm stuffing myself with pineapple tarts. Shittttt all the fats. Hahaha i eat them like everyday now. I better stop myself. And i get to wear dress during CNY! Yay i love my dress because its so simple and nice. Andandand Graces Camp! I get to see ppl wearing dresses! Yay! I dno wht gown/dress i shld buy. Hmmm but i settled the malay costume alrdy! Dont have to go and buy and waste money.
I've been thinking. Six is enough. Stop trying to squeeze in. I didn't want to say this, but i guess there is a limit to everything. I've been trying to be nice and all, but seriously, dont you think you're a bit too much? i'm not refering to the squeezing in thing, but its more of your character. I dont understand how sometimes you can appear to be nice, and then i believe tht you are a nice person, but the next moment, you're like this mean girl. And if you have somethign against me, well its so damn obvious. It's quite pissing for me. Because here I am, trying to be nice to the best of my ability, and there you are. Urghhhhhhh. I really really dont like it when people ignores you.

It's no wonder we think you're intolerable. I checked your blog, fakeness is totally plastered on the whole. I can't believe you changed so much. Please stop hurting my friend dearest. And leave her alone.

A Lonely Sunday Night.

Wahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh I have a lot of work to do, but I really don't feel like touching them. And the day looks so gloomy. Oh well. I'm still in the singing kind of mood. i feel like singing worship songs to God. Because, when i sing to God, i feel so at peace. And i could feel His presence if i sing with my heart. And it's such a good feeling. i love the song 'Thank You Lord'!
Oh oh and! Aft Dan told me abt the Tired Of You Song by The Exies, I've been listening to it. Blahhhh. I really feel tired of trying and initiating. It sucks. I should try to be mean and evil! Hmmm wah shit im in serious denial. Shittyyyyy. Really want things to settle down! And i'll be carefree and worriless. Haha if tht word even exists.

Tired Of You
The Exies

Where did I go wrong?
I can't look you in the eye
Feeling so ashamed
It feels like I could die

[Chorus]
Hold me up and don't let go
I've had enough
I'm tired of breathing
Tired of feeling
Tired of looking at the past for meaning
Tired of running
Tired of searching
Tired of trying
But I'm not tired of you

Losing everything
It's something I can't face
Hope is on the run
It's something I can't fake

[Chorus]

I want to feel a change
I don't mind if it hurts
You take away the pain
You're the only thing that's pure

Okay, yeah another quiz. But i'm bored and rotting at home. And i don't feel like blogging much. So I rather answer questions!

1. What type of guy/girl would you go for?
* Someone who gives me enough attention and makes me feel really secure, and can also make me laugh! Andandand sweet and thoughtful and shares about everything with me, smone whom i can trust in and rely on and confide in. One of the most impt thing would be being really initiative, because im tired of me making the first step, i had enough of that. I'm not picky, really.

2. So, where's your dad?
*Outside.

3. Do you drive yet?
* Nah.

4. How do you feel about racism?
* It's uh haha not encouraged ;D

5. Who's the sexiest person alive?
* RYAN PHILLIPPE!!!! Go google Flags of our Fathers!

6. Who was the last person you talked to on MSN or AIM?
* Kaiyu ;D

7. It's Friday night, what are you doing?
* Friday night was ytd, haha.

8. Name a song that reminds you of old memories?
* Haha my mind's blank.

9. Do you like the color grey?
* Yes! I like colours!

10. Is there someone you really can't stop thinking about?
* Hahah hmmmm.

11. Look outside, how's the weather?
* Not very blue. Just boring dull white.

13. Have you ever liked someone, and then found out that you really didn't?
* No. I'll know for sure if i liked smone or not.

14. Last time you didn't tell the truth?
* Uh i dont rmb.

15. Name something great that happened today?
* WEDDINGGGG! And singing The Prayer with Nic.

16. Do you regret doing something today?
* Nope. Nothing.

17. What would you like to tell your ex?
*I shall be nice and not hurl any unnice stuff. In any case, I do not want to dwell on him anymore.

18. When you think of the rainbow, what color pops in your head?
* Just multicolours!

20. Where would you like to be?
* The beach!!! GAH JIALEEEEEEEE!

21. What is the [worst] thing your parents could do?
* Uh quarrel? And break stuff at home?

22. Have you been happy recently?
* Not bad ;D i've been better.

23. Do you like receiving balloons on your birthday?
* I don't mind.

24. Math, English, Science, or Social Studies?
* Uhhhhhhhhhh. English, Geog, Science, Humanities.

25. What are you currently listening to?
* Nothing.

26. Do you have limewire?
* Used to. But it slows down my computer.

27. Do you wish you were somewhere far far away?
* Not far far far away. Just away from home.

28. Who do you think is the best newcoming artist?
* Haha i have no idea.

29. Do you own a Bible?
* Yeah, 2 actually.

30. Is lying ever acceptable?
* Yeah. White lies. But overall, no.

31. What was the last movie you watched?
* 27 dresses! ;D

32. Name someone who has turned your life around?
* My mum? I dont really understand this question.

33. How is your heart lately?
* Haha not that broken.

34. The person you dislike passes away, how do you react?
* I'll still feel sad. And be guilty tht i ever dislike her.

35. Who was the last person to give you a hug?
* Melanie.

36. Was today a good day?
* It was alright.

37. Does the person you like, like you back?
* Another hmmm question ;D

38. Do you think you will have kids by the age of 22?
* HAHAH NOOOO. I love kids, but not going to have them at 22!

39. What are you good at?
* Talking. Haha.

40. Last time you had butterflies in your stomach?
* Thursday, on my way to the siwmming pool. I have no idea why even. Weird me.

41. What did you dream last night?
* I don't even remember if i even dreamed or not.

42. The last text you received on your mobile was from?
* Dan ;D

43. Is there anyone you would like to fight?
* Haha no! I'm not a very violent person, but uh ppl like wingyau and jessie hits me ): So i hit back! Its called defense! ;p

44. What are you doing tomorrow?
* Church, then a continual rotting at home.

45. Do you like someone right now?
* Why do you keep asking tht!

47. What do you say most when you're trying NOT to curse?
* I would just make a noise in frustration and then not talk.

48. Does anyone like you?
* Hopefully please :DD

49. How would you tell someone you like them?
* I would say when i'm sure, but again I will only say when i'm sure the other person likes me too. Haha!

50. When was the last time you cried?
* Uh i dont think i cried anytime this week.

This was so purposefully made in a 14-questions format. For Valentines day. Hahhhh

1.Do you like anyone?
* ;DD I like all my friends ;D

2. Are you flirty:
* Nope.

3. Are you a player?
*Definitely no.

4. Would you get back together with any of your ex's?
* No.

5. Have you ever kissed anyone on your top friends?
* I kissed rachel before on the cheek.

6. Do you want a valentine?
* Yes please ;p

7. Have you slept over at the opposite sex's house?:
* Nah. Firstly, my mum won't allow. Secondly, it's not very appropriate isnt it?

8. Do you prefer group dates or single ones?
* Group dates with my girl friends then yes. If not, then single.

9. Would you kiss light or makeout sessions?
* No comments ;D

10. Do you like cuddling up while watching a movie?
* Hahah with somebody you love, then yep!

11. Any plans for valentines day?
* Yes, a very exciting one. We're going to visit old people at this hospital and send our love to them!

12. What's the best valentines day present for a boy?
* Just being with him? If hes not picky. Haha!

13. For a girl?
* A surprise!

14. Are you single or taken?
* Single, for now! Hahah

Blah. you're confusing. you're weird. I dont get this feeling you're telling me of. What you say doesnt go with wht you do. Am i suppose to belive the thigns you say to me, or wht you're doing, or rather, wht you're not doing to me. Oh well. Let's hope its not the way i think!
Today was so tiring and siannn ): I was liek falling asleep during bio already, and the only thing thts keepign me awake was my bladder. haha. And i nvr knew lili reads my blog, i nvr knew there are people reading my blog! Yeah. But haha her lang arts presentation today was abt SEXING SINGAPORE! Seeee now whos sicker ;DDD But she was damn funny, 4 years already, her choice of topics and way of presentation still hasnt change!

Can't wait for things to settle down and some thigns to be decided or developed or whtever. And then i can be a happyhappyhappy girl!

hI RACHEL. LIFESUCKS ;D;D;D;D;D;D;D

i AGREEEEEEEE
Jasmine, Jia Le and Wingyau and me are all in the library yay joy.

Okay end -.-

Perhaps, I should stop trying that hard. Or I should just stop trying. Shouldn't make this easy, or else it'll be a take me for granted kind of thing. Or should i? Gah confusionnnnn ):

Hmm anyway, Jasmine had been asking me to listen to Leave the Pieces. And i did. It's not bad lah. Country song. Haha Jas is trying to influence me into listening to country songs. And huiying, wingyau and me took pictusre of 3 random ppl doing chem hmwork! Haha Shall post the pics later. So funny lah, they are rushing to finish so tht they can catch their music bus -.- In the end, they didnt get it.
I've been bothering ppl with the "whats your purpose in life" question. Because i've been thinking, yeah for gdness knws why, whts my purpose in life. And then I realised I didnt have one, yay ): So then i started whining to Stef and Siying during Chem and Phy Prac. Boredom does stupid thigns to me ): But seriously, wht is my purpose in lifeeeeeee! Some kind soul can give me some suggestions. Because, i see people arnd me with a goal in mind, liek they knw what they will do in the future. Like ambitions and interest, and i see people who are either mathematically inclined or science or languages. But uh I'm like average in all lah. Sucky. Blah. So then i really felt like swimming aft that, and i did! Gladly. Swimming is love man ;D Even though i've my period, but ah hah. Once in a while wouldnt hurt rightttttt. Okay shall stop ranting and copy Leave the Pieces lyrics here. It's for jiale too! But yeah, maybe aft one week, she doesnt need it anymore, cuz she may make the other choice. Hmm so yeah goes:

Stand Still, Look Pretty
Leave the Pieces
Wreckers

You're not sure that you love me
But you're not sure enough to let me go
Baby it ain't fair you know
To just keep me hangin' 'round

You say you don't wanna hurt me
Don't wanna to see my tears
So why are you still standing here
Just watching me drown

[Chorus]
And it's alright, yeah I'll be fine
Don't worry 'bout this heart of mine
Just take your love and hit the road
There's nothing you can do or say
You're gonna break my heart anyway
So just leave the pieces when you go

Now you can drag out the heartache
Baby you can make it quick
Really get it over with
And just let me move on

Don't concern yourself
With this mess you've left for me
I can clean it up, you see
Just as long as you're gone

[Chorus]

You not making up your mind
Is killing me and wasting time
I need so much more than that
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

Leave the pieces when you go
Oh yeah
Leave the pieces when you go

End.







Sick of this Play, I am.

SO COOOOOOOL. Okay hahah many cool things. Firstly, Ms Sebestian actually commented that she thinks that wht I said at the Kranji War Memorial was moving ;D Wheee! Second cool thing, and though i said before that i can plait my own hair, i didnt realise how proud I shld be then! Hahah cuz i realised many people cnt! And i shall go tie it for them! Hahha.
oh my gosh. I'm talking to lili and cherie TOGETHER now. And it's disaster because here's one advice: Never ever talk to the both of them together. YOu'll be driven mad. I am liek completely speechless towards them. They are procliaming their greatest deepest love for each other, and both stating that they are gorgeous and beautiful AND THEY ARE ADVISING ME TO START THIS LOVER RELATIONSHIP WITH WINGYAU! Hahaha Oh man. Liliteo really sucks. Hahah she has liek classic jokes that make me laugh in front of the computer like an idiot! I better go to sleep before i get too high!
And me and lili are still debating over who is sicker. It all started on a sunny afternoon during integrated humanities. Dont kno wwhy but the class dsicussion leads to anal sex! So i turned roudn and asked lili abt it, and she happily 'shared knowledge' with me, as so she says. Now she says im sicker, when the fact she says shes imagining forcing the shit back in! -.- hahahaha Idiot lili! So imamture! Blahhhhhh i shall go sleep already. Seriously, before i get serious eyebags ):

Daughtry
Over You
Chris Daughtry

Now that it's all said and done
I can't believe you were the one
To build me up and tear me down
Like an old abandoned house

What you said when you left
Just left me cold and out of breath
Fell to far, was in way to deep
I guess I let you get the best of me

Well I never saw it coming
I should of started running
A long long time ago
And I never thought I'd doubt you
I'm better off without you
More than you, More than you know
I'm slowly getting closure
I guess it's really over
I'm finally getting better
Now I'm picking up the pieces
and spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together
The day I thought I'd never get through
I got over you

Cause I got over you!
I got over you!
I got over you!

It's a day I thought I'd never get through
I got over you

Blah. Wishful thinking, or maybe not. Im so confused. Like I really don't understand and i can't figure it out. Like sometimes, i feel that way, and i'm sure that i'm right, but then when ppl do like diff things, or i dont know, i feel liek it's just wishful thinking on my part. Okay haha i do not make sense. WAH i do not like the situation i am in now. Bah, do not like waiting but i shall have to ):
Anyway! Had a lot of small talk, or rather, many talks here and there with Jiale, Eva and Jas. And then I come to a conclusion that Girls are insecure, but some girls are more insecure than others, which is where I stand, sadly. Hahaha, can't stand Eva lah. She has this stupid J person goign aft here liek crazy, then she like so bo chap towards him, and yet shes getting all the attention directed towards her by him. His smses are like long and initiative. Well a bit too initiative for starters. But again. Lucky girl. Haha I think it's nice to be pampered and to be like smbody's one of the most impt person or whtever lah! hahah. Like some guy who is willing to direct all his attention, do all sorts of things for you and be initiative are so sweeeet! It's a very nice feeling to depend on others, cuz sometimes it's tiring to be independant :p. I sound love stuck, haha! But oh wellllllll. Eva! Ask that j person to stop trying to make signs of wanting to do intimate actions towards you, when you havent agree to be his gf! I can help you sms again ;DD Jiale! See now you have so many of us helping you go through this period! Sooooo, you better be alright soon!

Went Kranji War Memorial today, and it was such a pretty place. It was beautiful, and so peaceful. The graves were pretty, and althoough it was solemn and all, it was nice to view through the graves, and the youngest age was like 16! They died for Singapore. And some of them are really really really heroes. Can't help admiring their bravery. The design of the cemetary is so cool, i didn't even mind spending a whoel afternoon there! Thereafter we had this wreath ceremony, and Ms Sebastian asked me to represent 402 to say a few words. So this is what I said:

'To all the soldiers, the Unnamed and the Unknown,
You will always be remembered and honoured by all of us.
It matters not what ranking you were,
for in our hearts, you are of the highest honour.'

Quite cool right! Haha I made it up on the way while looking at the many graves.

Oh and i plait my hair today! Haha got quite a funny response. Helped jiale to plait her hair, er unsuccessfully. I shall try it again tmr! And jasmine! And jiaqi! I really like Jiaqi's hair ): Haha Eva refused to let me touch hers at all. Bah. My juniors were like 'Tie again tmr! My classmate want to see" I love my 1/2 class. So sweet and funloving! MWAHHHH. Esp enthusiastic people like Regine, Yue Ling, Ling An, etc. Time to time they sms me. Yay! So if regine's reading this, you can send my love to the class.
And my mum got me contacts! HAHA! Like 30 pairs for the entire year. So i have to use it only when i go out. But oh well, better than nothing. At least she finally got them for me. ;D

This post is dedicated to my dearest Jiale!
I have no idea what the hell this song is, but eh heh. The lyrics aint that bad. Go you! And when you know that you've gotten over it, and uh ready to face a brand new morning, you will realise how friends are always there for you. And i hope i'm helping, in one way or another. And i know you can do this, know you can pull through, because hey! You're stronger than me ;D

Letting Go
Sozzi

Don't call me
Don't write
Don't show up in the middle of the night
You know that
We needed
Some time and space to breathe

I still recall the words you said to me
It's what you did not say that sets me free
Now how can I find peace of mind when you keep coming back again?
It's okay for you to play this game of seesaw with my head

Now it hurts too much
And it hits too hard
And I won't play this part

Don't call me
Don't write
Don't show up in the middle of the night
You know that
We needed
Some time and space to breathe

So now I say the things I want to say
Sometimes it's better letting go this way
I'll always know
Down in my soul
We really had so far to go
I've given all I had to give
And now it's time for me to live
And I won't look back
And I won't regret
Though hurts like hell
Someday I will forget

It's funny how we seem to end up here
I never thought I'd see this soul disappear

Don't call me
Don't write
Don't show up in the middle of the night
You know that
We needed
Some time and space to breathe

And this is letting go
This is letting go
This is letting go
This is letting go

I think my entries previously were so full of anger and aggressiveness. How stupid. After all, I shoudn't be getting uptight ot upset over that anymore. I mean, if aguy cannot appreciate you then its his problem.
Anyway, I'm in denial. Sometimes i think problems of the heart is really something i cannot grasp. I dont know if i should do this or not. Girls are always insecure i suppose. But uh, I think I'm a very insecure person :/ which sucks yes. I'm a rather gullible person, believeing a lot of things on the surface, but then again,. i get suspicious and sensitive easily. I can be so outgoing and loud and everything, then I can be stony and moody and quiet. I make myself think that this is what i am but I do another. Split personality anyone? But back again to my point, should I let myself be troubled with such problems that deals a lot of my mental thoughts and emotions? Even without starting, and my heart feels heavy. Maybe I should just wait and see, because I cant figure out wht this person is thinking. Tells me one thing, but what this person does, makes me feel another. Oh well. My love life sucks. And anyw, im too young to bother with love matters, er right?

You make me believe in one thing, but go do another.

Firstly, let's talk about the superly educational trip to Jiale's house on sunday. Spent a lot of time wow-ing at the size and just about everythign abt her house. It's so HUGEEEEEEEEE and bare -.-. Seriously, she needs more junk food and more stuff. Haha but its so neat! She has like 1 guest room (with a personal toilet) 2 tv rooms, 1 living room, 1 dining room, 2 kitchens, four rooms with their own personal toilets, of which, one has a walk-in wardrobe!! Plus her foyer can fir in like 3 or 4 cars, and her backyard can play volleyball! And she grows chilli in her garden! HAHAHA. Shr has like toilets everywhere -.- But yeah super cool lah her house. And her grandpa so kindly treated us to Roti Prata! Wheee. And her brother is soooo nice, ahem! HAHA. And then after doing proj with jiaqi,eva, jasmine. I stayed at her house until 9.30! Yay fun fun. Cuz we spend like the last half hour talking abt stuffffff. And it feels great to have people who understand and whom you can relate to. Yay lets have another such talk pleaseeee! The most amusing news i heard must have been from Eva. I was shocked and totally amused. Like more than amused man. So unexpected. I wish her GOOOOOD LUCK! Hahah!
And i've been trying to learn some simple guitar chords from Eva! B and Bm is so irritating! Meanwhile, let's just stick to learning how to switch chord while playing. Hahhhhhhhhh. Go me! Go everyone!

Its inevitable that emotions of such will rise within me. But it's okay. Slowly, slowly. I know i can do it. I know I will. To not let someone who has treated you so bad to affect you, because if he doesnt give a shit, then he isnt worth it. Does it really matter if he has problems in his life? No, because what he did to me was worse. Giving up. Its a good thing. And a long process, but i'm going to do it. If he wants me to wallow or pine for him, i aint going to. And if hes reading this, he may feel happy. Doesnt matter....

WEEK 2 FEELS LIKE TERM 2):

最长的电影
周杰伦
我很忙

我们的开始　
是很长的电影
放映了三年　
我票都还留着
冰上的芭蕾　
脑海中还在旋转
望着你　慢慢忘记你
朦胧的时间　
我们溜了多远
冰刀划的　
圈起了谁改变
如果再重来　
会不会稍嫌狼狈
爱是不是不开口才珍贵

再给我两分钟　
让我把记忆结成冰
别融化了眼泪　
你妆都花了要我怎么记得
记得你叫我忘了吧　
记得你叫我忘了吧
你说你会哭　
不是因为在乎

“学习放下很艰难。
它不等于放弃。
放下的首要，实现对人类和世界有一个认识。
我们觉得痛苦，因为放不下。
放不下，因为执著。
执著，因为不愿接受这个残酷的事实。
尽管知道这个认识很真实，但知道归知道，承不承认又另当别论。
世界永远不完美，人性永远丑陋，生命永远不圆满。
我想，这就是认识。”

Just lost my voice, because of a huge quarrel. And how did this quarrel come about? Because of how ridiculous i find it when i'm not allowed to go Jiale's house to do project -.- The absurdity of it all. So things spiral out of control.
This time, and for the ever first time, I'm sure and I am insisting I am right.

I'm addicted to books now. I've been trying to get nice english novels. I've always liked the idea of me actualy liking more adultish novels. Because, i thought i would nvr grow to liek english novels. So now i do like them! but i'm just fussy over them. Echo Park by Micahel Conelly is what im reading now. And i can't wait to read My Sister's Keeper by Jodi Picoult! Oh mannnn everybody says its nice, and wingyau and jessie has read them already! NOOOOOOOOOO. I want that book! Somebody can be nice and buy for me :DDD
Oh well, good that school started proper. Now i'm doing work and there's no time to be on wild imagination. PLUS i can run! Yay, havent been running for 2 months, and it feels good to be runnign again. Running makes me feel relaxed, i dont think of anything when i run. i just run to my heart's content. I shall lose weight, and become less fat luh. ): Hate weighing machines. School's just starting to get even busier. Good luck me!

If you're getting happier, well so am I. Thank you, for I learned not to rely on anyone but myself.

Cleo! Shall add it to my new fav magazines list. The content is really good. Haha at least for me. There are liek juicy stories. And gossip girl. equally juicy. Haha all the bitching and everything, and the loveeee. Hmm school started. But I'm actually working hard already! Finished humanities proposal today with jiale. I rock, she suck ;p i've been listening to many english and chiense songs. And even more praise and worship songs by Hillsong. Music is love. Oh the other hand, i got quite pissed off actually. Because i do not know why, but people like to look when you are smsing or when you have a message coming, without permission. i think it's really rude and all. And it's damn awkward for me to liek 'push' them away. And then i only got one new message coming, then this retort came 'Wah new boyfriend ah?' I was like wtf? NEW? Okay i know you know abt all the break up shit. But then, its not that logn aft tht incident, do you take me as some flirt and all? because that realyl impies this meaning. You are liek trying to say that I'm that kind of person. And i said 'no, duh' very nicely already. And then leaned over and looked at my phone screen. And announced to the whoel world ' but guy leh! HAHAHA' -.- Huh so? It's not liek you dont sms guys? And i was asking question, so i was expecting a reply. -.- So every guy who smses me are my new boyfriends then? Sorry, but i'm really super senstive when it comes to this. And you may be reading this or something. No offense. Because even if you think i'm damn not guai to have a bf, or rather HAD a bf, this doenst mean i'm a player, because you are making me sound someone who doesnt invest feeligns in relationship. Well, you wouldnt know how much i love that guy and all. And maybe you think I'm silly or you don't believe me. But thats up too you, please dont make such comments like that. It's actually kind of sensitive.
Anyway. I don't think i should give a shit to this whole thing any longer. It's no good to me. i'm not going to let him expect me to continue to be sad and just pine for him everyday. that's not going to happen, anymore. Esp not what you do to me. until now. I think you aint worth it any more. You were too heartless and cruel. A complete jerk who doesnt have to go to such lengths to hurt me, but you did. Why the hell did i even apologise to you when you were pissed when i shld be pissed instead? I was stupid, and i know tht even as much as i say all these, i will still get emo in the near future. It's inevitable but yeah it'll pass. For now, i'll concentrate on studies and whtever's impt. Soooo i'm glad school started because things are more organised for me. I sleep early, i do work and not just slack and rot at home in front of the computer, having wild imagination almost everytime. So yeah. Good good. Smmore i'm trying to design class tee and psl camp bklet. Hope it turns out alright. Okay haha i'm just trying to encourage myself ;p. Go 402!

As 2008 approaches, I feel really empty inside. The feeling of emptiness is horrible, and yet, i seem to have this yearning deep inside me. I want to do something, it's as if i need somebody. I need a special someone to give me a hug and tell me everything's alright. i need just anyone who cares to say it's okay, we're always here for you. It seems everybody is counting down with someone or another, it seem severyone has someone to rely on, or at least someone to spend the last day of 2007. I seem to be alone, yeah i knw theres my family, but they seem so distant. I cant cry in front of them, i cant anything. That's why i'm yearning for someone to fill this empty me. I feel so empty, that i could cry out. I want to scream, scream until i break my voice, scream until i forget all my pain, scream until i am able to get everything off my chest. Because, my heart feels really heavy. It has been a difficult and hard year. I want to erase this year from my memory, ever. I know it's not possible, but i really want to. It's been really unfair for me, and i feel really pitiful. I guess I am pitiful. Holding on to something/one that will nvr come back to me, or nvr be the same. Its 2008 already, the last day of 2007 is always. It's a brand new year, the same old me, the same old feelings, but a brand new start, a brand new goal: Work really hard and score for my EOYs. I can see brilliant fireworks from Marina Bay and also from Mount Faber. Why is that genuine smile that has been lost from my face since then?

Shit. I'm losing myself. I've been thinking, and know it's quite true. i'm not the same anymore, i can't seem to get high, or crazy or anything. Oh Gosh, i'm crying again. And not because of this. I'm hurt, im still hurting. Not when the stupid me, clicked on smth wrong on facebook. Time and time again, i told myself, not to click on his profile on facebook, because its always on there that i find things that hurt me and make me cry, i've succeeded till now. I accidentally clicked on it, on his damn photo. And i was there, and then i saw it, all the stuff, liek who flirted with him, his hot friends include this one girl we used to quarrel abt. And he says they are just good frnds. All the compare ppl things are abt her, most desirable, hottest, and all. I mean yeah, i know im not supose to care abt this, anymore. But it just hurts. Because im confused again. What exactly does he want. He make me believbe i was his everything, and now, he removed me away from his life, and then aft that make me believe that he still care abt me because of how upset he got when he see the photos, and now this? He told me he didnt use facebook. Right, okay he used ot say i was hot and all. But i really didnt think i was. I mean i was nowhere near it. And right now, on his application, his beloved girl friend is fcking hot. Im jealous, im hurt, i shouldnt be. Im jsut being stupid, i cant help it. I really cant. Im so damn stupid. And now im crying over nothing, but in actual fact, im crying over the hurt that's washing me. i really dont know what he wants. I dont want this pain. i want it to go away, im so tired. Really. If he wants to live without me, so be it, stop this pain. Because i really love him. And i really cant stop myself. I know what i jsut wrote above is stupid, and what im getting so upset over is realyl stupid, and also, not worth crying over for. I know hes not worth it, but he was rly my everythign last time. Saying that 'it's over' to my frnds is easy, because i dont use my heart to say it. but if i do, i wont even be able to say it. And i cant even stop crying now. Oh shit. Somebody save me. i want my life back, i want me back ,the one i used to like.

My teeth hurts ): Cuz they started putting this chain thing on me. And the dentist wasn't exactly gentle when he put it on for me. Oh well. This year's christmas felt empty, except for rachelong's company and bernice's present. They are both really sweet besties. Esp when things are cleared up and somehow, i feel that we are more closer now. It's a good feeling. But other than that, it felt empty. Yeah. New year's coming, and i'm dreading it a bit. because it jsut means 2008 is coming. Sec 4, i'm supposed to be excited. After all, no O's, just end of years to really study hard for. And then lots of playing after that. Thats if until JC2 comes. It seems a bit far-fetched to think so far now, but oh well. I'm a person who always think far, well most of the time. I plan ahead, or rather, jsut think abt the future. I suppose it's quite tiring to think abt my current state, because i feel very tired about life. Tired as in the sian kind of tired. Hmm, thinking about it again, i can't wait for sec 4 to come. Then i can concentrate on studies, and yah. Put my mind off certain stuff. but again, it will be hard. Esp february. I'm pathetic. Urgh but i shall not wallow in self-pity. I don't think I'm that kind of person. i suppose i can be happy when i'm with friends i love. But can't help it when my mind runs wild.
Anyway, i hope next year's christmas would be better. Where more ppl actualyl remembers me. i dont feel very remembered this year. i mean like, it hought some people would get presents for me, but i was disappointed? I mean like its the thought tht counts. I actually got presents for every person I'm quite close to in church and in school especially. I even send smses to a lot of people ok! Then -.- Hmm but surprisingly bailu and jasmine smsed me. Yay, it's nice to be rmbed.

Merry Christmas. I've wished a lot of people possible. Just waiting for certain responds and replies.

This friend or something, told me this, " i was lookign at yoru blog, emo then sudenly happy?"
I'm not sure why, but i got kind of angry. I mean seriously. What do you want me to do. Mope around, waiting and waiting liek a fucktart for some fcking bastard who rejected me and ignored me first? Am i suppose to cry around the entire day, and live my life around him when he didnt want me first? No doubt okay, no doubt i still love him like some idiot, i love him wiht my life damn it. He removed me from his life, cruelly. And all i have done, is socialise a bit more, took SOME FUCKING PICS with some phillipines choir, went kl with my family, and i'm fucking at fault?At least i did not hurt your damn feelings, at least i nvr lied abt who i am going out with, at least up till now, i still love you like shit. At least i nvr stop trying to contact you. At least... And then after jsut these i have done, my efforts and all, you still dont fucking give a shit abt me, you nvr understand and you claim i nvr understand. hey, give me some credit okay, at least i explained and told you all my damn feelings before you turned away, but you nvr did try to talk to me. And you said you had enough, its over. Wtf who are you to say its over, who are you to say you have enough. i should be the one WHO HAS HAD ENOUGH. But yet, im still hopelessly clinging on to this. I relly hate myself for that. I mean after what you have done to me, aft how you left me, you aint worth that waiting. So what the hell am i doing then? looking at your bloody name jsut makes me want to cry. and even as im typing this,m im crying. But do you give a shit? no, its you and your dman life, how you';re messing it up. Weel its your choice. You dont want me in your damn life anymore. So? What can i do. And even if there are guys interested in me right now, I dont give a shit. talking is one thing. Aint you talkign to other girls too now? And you are happily, at least appearing, and you tell me, you are not happy, and i dont understand. and then again you say i am happy, because of how i look. But when i say i am not what i look, you dont believe. you are so damn unreasonable please. You expect me to believ you that you are not happy when you appear happy, but you dont blieve that im not as happy as i look. I got nothing to say.

Please. Even though i do still love you. Let me try to be happy, at least for xmas.

It's my first today. By myself. And there will be many more of todays next year. Shit. I don't like this feeling. I hate today. But I really miss today. Whatever.

Daughtry
Used To
Chris Daughtry

You used to talk to me like
I was the only one around.
You used to lean on me like
The only other choice was falling down.
You used to walk with me like
We had nowhere we needed to go,
Nice and slow, to no place in particular.

We used to have this figured out;
We used to breathe without a doubt.
When nights were clear, you were the first star that I'd see.
We used to have this under control.
We never thought.
We used to know.
At least there's you, and at least there's me.
Can we get this back?
Can we get this back to how it used to be?

I used to reach for you when
I got lost along the way.
I used to listen.
You always had just the right thing to say.
I used to follow you.
Never really cared where we would go,
Fast or slow, to anywhere at all.

We used to have this figured out;
We used to breathe without a doubt.
When nights were clear, you were the first star that I'd see.
We used to have this under control.
We never thought.
We used to know.
At least there's you, and at least there's me.
Can we get this back?
Can we get this back to how it used to be?

I look around me,
And I want you to be there
'Cause I miss the things that we shared.
Look around you.
It's empty, and you're sad
'Cause you miss the love that we had.

You used to talk to me like
I was the only one around,
The only one around.

We used to have this figured out;
We used to breathe without a doubt.
When nights were clear, you were the first star that I'd see.
We used to have this under control.
We never thought.
We used to know.
At least there's you, and at least there's me.
Can we get this back?
Can we get this back to how it used to be? Yeah.
To how it used to be.
To how it used to be, yeah.
To how it used to be.
To how it used to be.

This entry is specially dedicated to Rachel Ong. And it's a late entry too, because I had many things to do before. So this thank you is late. Sorry k! She's really my bestest bestest friend. She's been so so so nice, like seriously. The first and only person who knows what really happen, as in in details and everything. First person who actually lifted up my spirits, and let me realised that this isn't the end kind of thing. She's a friend, my friend, that will always be there for you. Uh hopefully, because goodness knows where she might disappear to the next year ):
There's actually a lot a lot i want to say, but i don't know how to start and all. She actually gave me a cup, similar to what she's using, because she wants me to think of her when i drink, HAHA, which is really very amusing. Hmm, and then she lend me Baby Blues! I've finished reading already, yay my all-time favourite! She also gave me this Little Miss Fickle shirt, which was kind of sweet, althoough she says she didnt want it. :ppppp But its the thought that counts! And she also gave me this calligraphy piece of hers, that talented girl. I'm so freaking jealous. I'll never be able to write so well. Let me show you a picture of what she gave/lend me. :D

Aiyah shit, i just realised I should have written this post in a one to one thing, and not like a third person. So if rachel's reading this, just treat all the "she" as "you" so its like, you are and will be my bestest bestest friend ever! Haha yeah. Aiyah i really miss her/you. Fine, i shall direct my words to rachel. Come back quick! how can you stand taking all the tests overseas when it's holiday! You better come back by 14th, when I'm back in SG too. I miss you man. Let's go out again, like um to watch movie or anything. You must be happily shopping in melbourne now. Buy something cheap for me k! If you happen to chance across this entry while you're STILL there. AND I LOVE YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU! :D Hughughug!

Sometimes, I think I'm just plain self-conscious. Too much of that actually, and too little self confidence. Yeah, Ha Ha right? Seems to think that a lot of people think i have a lot of self confidence. Okay, I do have confidence when I talk, or present this and that. But other areas of my life, I really feel that I lack serious self-confidence. From what i remember from my life, I wanted to do a lot of things, but somehow the low self confidence which I have just forbids me. I just sort of give up first already. There's a lot of things i want to and need to excel in. Not only academic wise, but also sports wise, and others wise. It sucks when you're stuck in a CCA, knowing you would never be good in it. It sucks when you know you can do well in your studies, but everyone around is so effing smart and good, you just feel all damn demoralised when you look at your own. It sucks to see myself deproving. I played basketball today, and damn myself, out of like 10 shots i aimed, only maybe 3 got in? It used to be like 8 in 10. Yeah small thing, but it just makes sense when you see the big picture. A small thing can make me realise a lot of things. It sucks that when singing is my life, and i really love singing, and i really really really think i can sing better than average, at least good enough. It's like out of the little capabilities I have, it's one of those that I'm really proud of. I want to sing. Better. Better than now. But, I don't know music. I mean, I actually can't read music you know? I don't take piano, I don't go for any music lessons. And then about 2 years ago, my mum asked if i want to be enrolled in any music school. I mean even my cousin went into a music school for singing lessons. But I have to admit I sound better than her. I mean seriously. But then, I said no to my mum. And why the hell did i do that? Because i know that, even if i say i want, she won't even. We're not even rich. I don't know. Maybe if i had push a little, just go for it, and not give up so easily. I would have known music, I would have sing even better than now. It sucks that I have no extra 'special', or whatever you call them, lessons. People have private lessons like what? Archery? Singing? Swimming? I've got none. Okay, i can swim well for long distances, but only in breast stroke. i can't even swim free style. Why? Because i learnt swimming from my dad, not from any lessons. i've got like no certs or anything. It's really very depressing. And when our teacher ask for certs for any outside activities/talents. Everybody around me had something to show. I've got nothing. Know how demoralised i felt? i'm too self conscious, so much that i hate myself for it. I know i shouldn't be like that, because it's not really healthy, but it's just all natural for me to be, like that you know? Just like when i was in primary school, i represented my school for debate, but when it comes to the part where you voiced your own opinions, I was like almost silent throughout! Why? Because i was scared to make a mistake, scared that what i say will be irrelevant, I'm so damn scared, I'm so damn it self-conscious. Self consciousness gets in my way, and so does afraid of making mistakes as well. People around me thinks I'm a strong/hard girl. But fact is, if you are fierce, or more intimidating, I'll just be afraid to be around you. i will look/sound/be awkward around. Has anyone ever ever noticed that whenever people around me are more outspoken, and all, I'll just be like not myself, I'll tone myself down. I don't know why, but i think i'm more or less useless. So what if i got stamina? So what if i can run in long distance? Why do i get the feeling that people thinks i'm just this boastful egoistic person? Esp from this one person, her look is so damn intimidating, and it's obvious that she doesn't really like me. And i hate it whenever i ask a question, or talk to her, she'll just look at me with that no emotion look, and then turn away? It makes me want to slap her hard.

Okay. I shall stop. I'll just rant out today, and the next thing you know, I don't really care anymore, and I'll be her frnd again. Because, I can't be angry for long. Maybe I should for once, do something for myself. And by that i mean, really go all the way out, and do well in that thing(s) i want to excel in. And then, i'll be more like what I am in primary school, because that's where I really am confident of myself, where I can be more like myself, and excel in the things I do.

Hahah. I chanced upon this and found it so amusing! It's like dramatic and yet altogether true! So here goes:

After marriage, how couples behave...

Dating process:
6 weeks : I love U, I love U, I love U.
6 months : Of course I love U.
6 years : GOD, if I didn't love U, then why the hell did I propose?

Back from Work:
6 weeks : Honey, I'm home.
6 months : BACK!!
6 years : What did your mom cook for us today??

Gifts:
6 weeks : Honey, I really hope you liked the ring.
6 months : I bought you a painting; it would fit the motif in the living room.
6 years : Here's the money. Buy yourself something.

Phone Ringing:
6 weeks : Sweety, somebody wants you on the phone.
6 months : Here, for you.
6 years : PHONE RINGING.

Cooking:
6 weeks : I never knew food could taste so good!
6 months : What are we having for dinner tonight?
6 years : AGAIN!!!!

Apology:
6 weeks : Honey muffin, don't you worry, Ill never hold this against you.
6 months : Watch out! Don't do it again.
6 years : What's not to understand about what I just said??

New Dress:
6 weeks : Oh my God, you look like an angel in that dress.
6 months : You bought a new dress again???
6 years : How much did THAT cost me?

Planning for Vacations:
6 weeks : How do 2 weeks in Gilgit or anywhere you please sound??
6 months : What's so bad about going to Islamabad on a charter plane?
6 years : Travel? What's so bad about staying home???

I love Baby Blues. They are so funny and amusing and cute! Hmm. I went swimming ytd. Felt so good. I actually swam like 28 laps, and i wanted to swim more, because i didn't feel the least bit tired ;D I'm so proud of myself. I love the pool! And i want to go out! So hard to date people, busy schedules, or clashing ones. I want to watch enchanted! Heard that Hero aint that nice, so hmm cancel that one out then. I hope there will be better movies coming. It's holidays! At least show some movies worth watching!
Anyway, i shall throw the emo me behind. For now, i shall be more happy and more like myself. It's really time to catch up with all my friends and all. But not a lot of time left. School's actually going to start in another month or so!!! And all my homework! Shit ):

I love my mum! I love rachel ong! Hahah

1. First thing you do in the shower?
= uh i pee.

2. What's your favorite line from a movie?
= i dont rmb lines from movies you know.

3. Do you like coffee?
= I prefer tea!

4. How are you feeling RIGHT now?
= uh okay luh.

5. Crush's name?
= nope. no crush.

6. Do you say aim or a-i-m?
= -.- i say aim. i spell a-i-m.

7. What are you?
= human being.

8. Could you eat your favorite food everyday for a month and not get sick of it?
= NO. No way.

9. What are you craving?
= Hot/Iced Choc. or Hot Milo!

10. What comes to mind when I say cabbage?
= caterpillars.

11 . Have you ever counted to 1,000?
= no -.- thats like insanity.

12. Do you bite into your ice cream or just lick it?
= i do both! hahaha.

13. Do you use smileys?
= haha yeah. they are quite cute, esp when you draw them.

15. Have you ever met a celebrity?
= uh yep.

16. Do you like cottage cheese?
= i like cheese just fine.

17 . What's the last song you had stuck in your head?
= 我们的歌 - 王力宏

18. Favorite place to be?
= HOME:DDDDD

19. Are your parents strict?
= not really actually.

20. Would you go sky diving?
= If its free. hahah!

21 . Would you go out to eat with George W. Bush?
= No. he should come and eat with me. :p

22 . Is there anything sparkly in the room you're in?
= Sparkly?! Nah, you wont ever.

23. Do you rent movies?
= Nope.

24 . Who sits in front of you in your spanish class?
= I wish i take spanish.

25. Where are you going to be Saturday night?
= which is today. uh i go novena church, then i go eat and then i go ntuc with my mum for grocery shopping.

26. Brown or white eggs?
= White.

27. Like rap music?
= Depends. I can hardly get english rap though.

29 . Experienced the twin towers falling in New York?
= huh, no.

30 . Is anyone in your family famous?
= ME ME ME!

31. What day of the week is it?
= Saturday.

32 . What was your Lunch?
= My mum's fried rice.

33. What is your best friend doing tomorrow?
= Which one are you talkign about? anyway, i wouldnt know. ahha.

34 . Have you ever seen The Butterfly Effect?
=Eh shit. I thoought i've heard of it or seen it or smth. now i cant rmb what happen. Or if i really seen it o.0

35. So, how about them Yankees?
= Ah?

36. What is your bus number for school?
= 961 then 131. But uh my dad does the fetching.

37. Is your hair curly?
= slight wave.

38 . Last time you cried?
= Uh. Let's not talk about it shall we?

39 . Ever walked into a wall?
= Ehhhhhhhhhhhh heh. Shhhhhh :x

40. Have you ever bought anything from Pac Sun?
= Is there even such a shop/brand?

41 . Favorite season?
= Autumn?

42. The next person you'll hold hands with?
= My mummmmmmmy!

43. Do you sleep with the TV on?
= Nahhhhhhh.

44 . Have you ever drank alcohol straight from the bottle?
= i can't even take the slightest alcohol!

45. Do you think you're old?
= 15 is hardly old.

46 . Are you afraid of the dark?
= Not really. If im in familiar surroundings then no. But if in new surroundings, I'm afraid. Sadly.

47 . Do you like your life right now?
= Not sure. It will get better, i'm sure.

48. When is the last time you chose a bath over a shower?
= Never. I always prefer shower over bath.

49. Do you knock on wood?
= haha yeah.

50 . Do you have good vision?
= Not especially ):

51. Can you hula hoop?
= YES! It's my most recent fetish :D

53. Worst thing that happened today?
= Nth really bad happened today.

54. When is your next road trip?
= 10th dec.

55. Have you ever crawled through a window?
= I watched other crawled through one.

56. Can you handle the truth?
= Yeah. I WANT the truth. But i'm not saying i wont cry. But at least, i want to know.

57 . What was the most recent thing you bought?
= Sweets?

58. How often do you talk on the phone?
= Hardly.

59. Are you in a complicated relationship?
= Used to. Now its over.

60. Do you hate more than 3 people?
= Nah i dont hate anyone. Because with hate, comes love.

It's gone. All over. My heart really died. No more. Nothing. I'm all alone. Left with nothing. How. Why... why...

I'm dying. I really am. I need help. Serious help. Somebody? Please. Somebody who cares enough.

For a moment, i thought i will never stop crying. For a moment, i thought i will die, die from this immense hurt my heart is going through, die from this hurt and pain that's wrenching me apart. Yeah, i've changed, emotionally. And it's bad. Shit. I hate me.

Whatever. Anyway, back from shanghai. Envy my friends who have great buddies, great class. Many of them found cute/shuai guys (acc to them) and went totally boy-crazy. Kinda funny actually. Anyway, i really learnt nothing there except on how to bargain. My group actually pissed all the shoes shop off at the new Xiangyang Lu, because we insisted on 40/50RMB for one pair of converse sneakers, but the stalls only go as low as 60RMB. In the end, i bought an Adidas for 80RMb. Yeah, ironic. I've been doing many ironic things. So i can't really be bothered.

The dorms were good. Surprisingly. The hotels at Hangzhou was even better. The Shanghai's Orchard Road, which is Nanjing Road basically, was like Wow at first, but gradually you realised there's nothing special, because for one there are no shops that attracts us, and for second, you can't bargain, and for third, you get molested. (and i don't really want to talk about it.) Only good thing was, there were like 3 KFCs along the whole stretch, which is a good sign because I can go crazy over the Egg Tarts. Creds goes to Eeyang who told me that egg tarts even existed in their KFCs. Cultural streets are damn boring -.- So nothing on that. I think sitting on the planes there and back are the funnest thing. You get to watch many movies and eat airplane food. There's always a toilet, which is CLEAN, with a FLUSH, and has a LOCK, plus TOILET PAPER are always avaliable. Face it, Shanghai toilets suck to the core. They smell, there are no lights, they dont flush properly, toilet papers are almost non-existant, the locks (if there is even any) are not working. The basins are sometimes flooded with goodnessknowswhat. Okay, anyway, back to airplanes. Yeah, the last time i sat on an airplane was like K1? And i was still sucking on a milk bottle man. So actually to sum it all up, this is my second time on a plane, but first time alone, first time on a SQ plane, first time out of Southeast Asia. Uh hmm. Nope, not trying to exaggerate or brag or whatever you are thinking of. Just making my point across. So yeah, that's kind of about it. I'm not going to go on and on and on and on about Shanghai. One last thing though, hate the air there, hate the people who smoked all day long, really hate it.

I need to break away. But first, i need the problem/s solved, or I will just self-destruct.

BETRAYED.

I'm on a blogging mode today. So i shall go on with my quizzes.

Name two things you would NOT tolerate in a relationship?
- lies/distrust, and sudden changes, while expecting me to accomodate.

Are you afraid of falling in love?
- not sure

Is there someone who pops into your mind at random times?
- yeahhhhh

When was the last time you flew in a plane?
- oh ytd?

What did the last text message you sent say?
- hmm.

How many kids do you want to have?
- um not sure. more than one.

Where was your default picture taken?
- not a photo, its a picture.

Honestly , what's on your mind right now?
- ... lets not talk abt it. or i'll just go on from here.

If you could go back in time & change something, what would it be?
- i rather change smth now for the better. no use changing the past.

Who knows you the best?
- Right now, its my mum. And i miss her loads. I cant wait vfor her to be back tmr! i want to hug her.

Do you get along with your family?
- yeah usually

Do you wear contact lenses or glasses?
- glasses.

Did you buy something today?
- nope. stuck at home.

When is the last time you had a massage?
- never had one.

Last person to lay in your bed?
- me

Last person to see you cry?
- no one. nobody sees it when i cry.

What are your plans for the weekend?
- go out with my family. go church.

Who did you last hang out with
- um my friends?

[1] Lose a lover, or love a loser?
- love a loser. perhaps im losing smone now. im trying hard not to but to no avail.

[2] Smoke pot, or drink beer?
- none. cant stand any of tht.

[3] Run two miles straight, or walk eight miles?
- run 2 miles straight.

[ 4] Go to the beach, or have a milkshake?
- have an iced choco.

[5] Laugh when nobody else is, or not laugh when everyone else is?
- laugh when nobody else is. because, im sure to laugh when everyone else is.

[6 ] Drink ten cans of soda at once, or never drink soda again?
- never drink soda.

[ 7] Have your pants ripped, or get thrown in a trash can?
- have my pants ripped. anyw, i dont wear pants a lot.

[8] Kiss someone you don’t like or, kiss someone who doesn’t like you?
- dont kiss.

[9] Not take a bath for a week or take a bath in a lake?
- look for a toilet to bathe.

[10] Be an only child or have five brothers?
- have five brothers.

[ 1 1] Cry in front of 5,000 strangers, or cry in front of your whole school?
- 5000 strangers.

[ 12] Be able to rewind time or, see the future?
- see the future. looking at the past will just hurt me more, doesnt it?

[14 ] Die the day after the best day of your life, or live to be ninty?
- live to be ninety.

[ 15 ] Go skydiving or, go scuba diving?
- skydiving.

[ 16] Be loved by one person, or have ten people who like you?
- Be loved by one person.

[17 ] Be fat and pretty or skinny and ugly?
- be fat and pretty. this reminds me of the bitching we have at shanghai, with regard to aoyuan and ___. yeah better to be fat cuz you can do smth abt it, then to be ugly but cant do much.

[ 18 ] Love and lose or, never love at all?
- both sounds painful.

BASICS
Name: rachel.
High school: nygh.
Elementa ry: rmps.
Favorite soda: dont like soda.
Favorite fruit: every fruuuuuuit.
Favorite season: no seasons. and im appreciating it.
LAST talked to: sister.
Shower: not yet ):
Watched: stardust, no reservations, moulin rouge. blahblah.

HAVE YOU
Ever cried over a girl or boy: yeah. many countless times.
Ever been arrested: Nope
Ever had a friend die: nope
Ever used a gun: no.
Ever finished a puzzle: uh hmm.
Ever got beaten up: Nope.
Ever hated someone: Yeah
Ever made a huge mistake: yeah loads.
Ever jogged a mile: yeah.
Ever broken someones heart: no. dont think so.

NUMBERS
Favorite number(s): 1,3,4,7,9. yeah i know. thats a lot.

PICK ONE
Blue or Red? RED
Spring or Autumn? I dont careeee. Bothhhhhhhh

RANDO M
Do you speak any other language:
- yeah.

Wanting to see some1?: yeah.
How old do you look: two elderly ppl at shanghai ask which university in shanghai i attend.
How old do you act: superly mature.

Do you have any pets?: noooo.

I'm the guy who will text you every single morning and tell you good morning, and every single night to tell you sweet dreams.

I'm the guy who will hold you when you're crying and wipe away your tears.

I'm the guy who still thinks you're beautiful with no make-up on, wearing your most torn up jeans and a plain tee-shirt

I' m the guy who won't pressure you to do things that you don't want to do.

I' m the guy who kisses you on the forehead; it doesn't always have to be on the mouth.

I'm the guy who doesn't kiss and tell.

I'm the guy who actually listens to you when you talk.

I'm the guy who's waited all day because I'm looking forward to our date that night.

I'm the guy who is content to just be able to hold you and wants nothing more.

I'm the guy who can't help but smile when you walk into the room.

I'm the guy who's perfectly content with staying in and watching movies and cuddling.

I'm the guy who won't lie to you about where he's going or where he's been, or who he's been with.

I'm the guy who gets butterflies when he hears your name.

I'm the guy who's not afraid to tell his friends he loves you.

I'm the guy who doesn't mess with other girls when I have you; you're the only one that I need.

I'm the guy who doesn't care about your imperfections, and loves you more for them; who wants a perfect girl? that's just boring.

I'm the guy who will hold you while we watch the sunset.

I'M THE GUY WHO REALLY WANTS TO MAKE YOU THE HAPPIEST GIRL IN THE WORLD.














No longer impt. i dont have this guy, not anymore. Or rather, im hoping this guy will come back. Foolish yeah?

im useless.
im crying over the phone, but no one cares, no one asked.
im alone, i have no one.
and yet, im waiting for a call, that will never come.

i cant stop crying.
FUCK. I NEED SERIOUS HELP. IM SERIOUS. save me... anyone, just help me get out of this mess.

saddest day.
saddest day of realization.
waited almost three hours. i did everythign i could. i sacrificed and i... i really really did all that i can.
i got nth in return.
when request for just an hour of attention, i got rejected. all i ask was one hour. is that rly too much to ask for?
im getting more and more pathetic.
i cried for the whole day. outside. didnt think it was embarrassing. i didnt care any longer. the pain in my heart is overwhelming. i really want to die. help me somebody. save me.

i want to end this. i just need courage. i cant bear it any longer.

Sometimes, i feel that i try too hard. Damn with it, i DO try too hard. In a lot of things i do, in many areas, and in CERTAIN area, i really try much much too hard. So hard that it's bad for me. I will become pathetic, seemingly desperate. But it's really more of pathetic. That's how i feel. Like seriously, I've to keep pushing and pushing, prompting and prompting. I'm too hard on myself. I'm tired of trying, im fed up, im angry, im pissed. But mostly, i feel very disappointed. Damn fcking disappointed. And when people are so laid back, I can still be so persistent. I really dislike laid back people, nor do i like people who can't make decisions quickly.

Yeah, i should stop trying. People are taking it, taking ME, for granted.

'She brushed some hair off her face and looked out into the middle-distance. “I love him, but I can’t get over what he did. That’s why I’m so angry with him. Because I still want him, and he ruined it.” '

my heart is wrenching out in pain.
i want this to work out, despite the hurt i've gone through, in which you never understood.

im a wreck. a total wreck.
save me somebody, please.

and i see piles of used tissue in front of me. it's just going to increase.

歌曲：妹妹
歌手：光良 专辑：童话

打印预览 你笑说风好大
没说两句话
泪就像雨落下
好好哭一哭有没有带走
眼里那颗沙
看着你在挣扎
还是爱着他
说什么话都多余啊
爱情像个长假
再美的回忆
结束了还是要回家
不管是苦涩还是甜蜜
忘了他他是个傻瓜
他不值得你
还为他流泪牵挂
有太多好男人是你的选择啊
想再看到你笑的灿烂如花
忘了他我的妹妹啊
虽然他也是
我最喜欢的朋友啊
我打算从此再也不见也不理会他
我们把他忘了吧

你说你不怪他
你还是会想他
对爱你已不再有想法
成长的痛苦
原来有那么多的代价

this.

彻底地失望.
Im really hurt, hurt beyond belief. The pain in my heart hurts me so much that its unbearable. i want to cry out loud, but i can only control and cry silently. The sky is dark. The darkest i ever seen. Coincidence? Not quite. It's really dark. The normal me would have gaze at it in wonder, this time? I have a strong urge to go out, walk under the rain, numb myself. I don't want to think, dont want to feel. I dont want to face anybody. I want to be alone. I need God. Maybe, God is trying to tell me smth, telling me to give up, telling me that once i let go, all the pain and hurt will be over. But I cant seem to do it. Im trying my hardest too, i cant. Im clinging on to it, this last hope, clinging on stupidly like a fool. I really cant take this anymore. God, please help me. Why is it so damn it difficult to let go? It's easy to end it all with just a few words. But i cant seem to do it. I cant. I've sunk in too deep. I cant get out, and nobody can save me. Nobody, not my friends not my family. Its just me and me alone. Depression. I'm getting it. I want to get it. i yearn for someone to care for me, truly care for me. I yearn for someone to understand me completely, comfort me and soothe me that everything will be alright, telling me that no matter what, they will be there for me. Always. I never knew, never expected, never realised that it had/has hit me so hard. It'll never be the same again. Not anymore. It's gone. Gone. The magic, the whole emotions and all. Gone. Never be the same again. Cold, hard truth. How many times have i tried to tell myself that everything will be alright, everythign will be alright. But in truth, i was just getting hurt repeatedly. Can't take this anymore. Can't pretend everything's alright.
I really am the biggest fool.

enough on emo posts. uh for now. i dont act emo. i cant even act emo. im always happy and high in sch. so i dont put on a show, esp not putting on an emo show. i just feel that me myself am gettin out of hand. my emotions and feelings are spiralling out of control. i feel as if i am almost going insane. its the turmoil inside me. yeah. i dont want to suffer from some depression or smth. so yeah. control. take things lightly. let go.
always easy to say. doing it seems miles away.

it hurts.

it hurts to know.
it hurts to realise that there are ppl arnd who thinks tht the papers are difficult and that they will scored badly, sharing the exact sentiments as you, but in the end, all ended up getting higher than me. it hurts, seriously. it may not be a big deal to you, but you're not the one who has that kind of marks. so easy for you to shrug it off and say its not impt and all that crap yknw. really, ppl shld stop saying they are scared of scoring badly and sayign the papers are tough, when deep inside them they knw they are perfectly capable of getting a high a1. because others, like me, feel cheated and whtever.

it hurts most.
it hurts most when you realised someone chose others over you, chose other people, for example, over you. thats the whole sickly hurtful feeling you'll get. it hurts most when someone, especially someone dear to you, chose other ppl over you. it hurts, it really does.


yeah i know. more demoralisation.

hmm. its late. and i dont wnat to blog. but i dont knw why i am here. strange. guess i rly do miss my blog. miss blogging on a daily basis. haha but it wont happen again. i wont go cuckoo over blogging. more on fictionpress or neopets. :p

right.

雨在下，人在哭。
天不是为我而下，而是和我一起哭。
i wonder why.

this is not the first time. neither will it be the last, sadly. its so hard to let go, so hard to just end it all. stupidity fills me. for what i've done, i feel like a fool. i should have known, should have realised, should have heeded those advice. but no, im sinking deeper and deeper into this miserable hole. believe? its tough. trust? not possible yet, not yet.
more abhorrence. im sick of this. tired and drained. im full of swear words i want to spit out. this is not me, and yet this is me. irony? not perhaps. i need a life, need to get away from this. all these unbearable bloody shit. its easy to see, easy to comment, easy to say, but not easy on the person whom you're saying to. you think its easy? not when you're not the person whos experiencing it. the emotional pain and all that emo crap. to say you understand and know is bullshit. i repeat, BULLSHIT. im being hateful. so? hate me then, get away from me. i've said time and time before, im sick and tired. now? its worse than that. im goign to get numb one of these days. numb until i cant even cry. for now, its just more crying. you think im acting emo? being emo? if you want to see emo, go see ppl whos cutting thier flesh up.

im this close to end this all.

23 Deep Questions -.-

1. What is more difficult: looking into someones eyes when telling how you feel, or looking into someones eyes when they tell you how they feel?
` looking into someone's eyes when telling how i feel.

2. Think of the last time you were angry. Why were you angry?
` its extended anger. haha. for a few days recently just because.

3. You will die in three minutes. Last call?
` the person i love.

4. If you could do anything OR wish anything, what would it be?
` that needs a lot of thinking.

5. You can have one of the following two things: trust or love?
` love. with love, comes trust.

6. You are walking to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss told you if you are late one more time you're fired. Do you save the dog?
` um get help from anyone arnd whos willing to jump into canal. ensure that dog is saved before rushing for work.

7. Would you or have you ever blackmailed someone?
` nope. my sister's the one forever blackmailing me.

8. Think of the last person who you know that died. You have the chance to give them 1 hour of life back, but you have to give one year of your life. Do you do it?
` depends on whos the last person i knw who died. but most probably yes.

9. Are you the kind of friend that you would want to have as a friend?
` haha uhhhhhh duh! ;DDDDD

10. Does sex=love?
` no -.- sex is another form of love.

11. Are you old fashioned?
` uhhhh in some ways. haha.

12. Would you marry someone if they were unable to have sex?
` why are they unable to have sex. phobia?

13. What would be harder for you, to tell someone you love them or that you do not love them back?
` that i dont love them back.

14. What do you think would be the hardest thing for you to give up?
` a lot. generally, love.

15. Romantic love, when was the last time you told someone you loved them?
` im angry these days. so uh quite long ago.

16. If you had to go back in time and change one thing, if you HAD to, even if you have "no regrets" what would you change?
` i hate these kidn of questions. because its unrealistic, and its no point pondering over wht you shld change and blah.

17. Imagine. It is a dark night, you are alone, it is raining outside, you
hear someone walking around outside your window. WHO do you wish was there with you?
` ;DDDDDDDDDDDD my special someone.

18. Would you give a homeless person CPR if they were dying?
` uh later transfer carbon dioxide instead how. haha call for help and call for ambulance luh.

19. You are holding onto your grandmother's dying hand and the hand of a newborn that you do not know as they hang over the edge of a cliff. You have to let one go to save the other which one would it be?
` hahah can save both lah. baby so light.

20. When and how was the last time you
told someone how you REALLY feel?
` hai cant rmb.

If You had three months to live:

21. Do you tell anyone or everyone you are going to die?
` yeah. haha

22. What do you do with your remaining days?
` im not going to plan or whtsoever.

23. Would you be afraid?
` hmm depends.

Sometimes, i think if too many thoughts just run through your head, when all the unhappy shit just keep going through your mind. all the anger hurt and emotions just keep raging within you, and inside you, you want to vent all these feelings out, tell somebody or just let somebody know, and you cant wait to blog about it. but after that, you just feel so damn drained out. everything just leave you, and you dont want to blog abt it anymore.

yeah well, life's that.

omg! got this quiz when i read wingyau's blog then went to qianwen's blog! its rly damn true! WHEE!

Quiz

Your view on yourself:
You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:
You are very serious about relationships and aren't interested in wasting time with people you don't really like. If you meet the right person, you will fall deeply and beautifully in love.

Your views on education
Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:
You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:
You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:
You are concerned about your image and the way others see you. This means that you try very hard to be accepted by other people. It's time for you to believe in who you are, not what you wear.

Who is your true self:
You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.

im so stagnant :D

1. Where is your brother right now?
; bathing.

2. Last time you went swimming?
; fridayyyyyyyy. alrdy two days.

3. Name three things you did yesterday?
1. sang for wedding(:
2. had a bad dream
3. had a bad night.

4. Last person you text messaged?
; haiyuannnn.

5. What kind of phone do you have?
; sony ericsson w850i. is it? :/

8. What are you listening to?
; nth much.

9. What do you smell like?
; i smell nice. shampoo and shower gel :p

10. What color are your eyes?
; blackish brown.

12. What color is your bedroom floor?
; white?

13. Do you have a chair in your room?
; yeah. ands its standing there, not fufilling its purpose.

14. What are you doing tomorrow?
; some work.

17. Do you know someone named Betsy?
; nope.

18. What color is your mom's hair?
; hahah dyed black.

19. Do you have a dog?
; nah and i dont want one, thank you.

20. Do you remember singing any songs as a kid?
; yes. im constantly reminded from my parents.

21. Are you married?
; hahah nah.

22. When was the last time you talked to one of your siblings?
; maybe abt half hour ago?.

24. Do you play an instrument?
; recoredr. the same answer i always give.

25. Do you like fire?
; nooooooooo ):

26. Are you allergic to anything?
; hmm dont think so.

27. Do you have a crush on anyone?
; hahah crush? unlikely.

29. Have you ever been to a spa?
; no im poor.

32. Do you miss someone?
; always do.

33. Do you think they miss you too?
; think so. i hope so.

34. Have you ever seen your school counselor?
; no duh.

35. Have you ever wanted to be a teacher?
; hahh yah.

37. What's your favorite color?
; i loe all the colours. green and orange! black and white! red and brown! i recently discovered peach is a nice colour.

38. Is anyone jealous of you?
; how i know.

39. Ever been stuck in an elevator?
; yep. once or twice or thrice.

40. What does your mom call you?
; jia wei. wei wei.

42. What does you hair look like right now?
; damp.

43. Has a friend ever used you?
; i dont knw. i dont like to think of unhappy stuff.

44. Has anyone told you that they like you more than a friend?
; yah.

45. What have you eaten today?
; food! at some really hot hawker centre. i literally was losing water through sweating ok.

46. Is your hair naturally curly or straight?
; wavy actually.

48. Who was the last person you were in a car with?
; my ah gong, ah ma, sister and uncle.

49. What are you looking forward to?
; thursday<3

50. How are you today?
; im okay. so so.

change my blogskin! yes finally. after 1243256568745 years. but it will be temporary i guess. its too dull and black and i dont know. but i like the picture! yay yay! okay and i love rachel [ong]! she's so sweet and nice! she backed cookies especially for me and gave me in a nice nice box. and she gave me my super belated valetines daygift. which was this made of ood heart shaped stick. hahah she made it herself. yay i love her!
anyw i hate my phoneeeeee. actually, no. i only hate my phone screen. its so ugly please. so many scratches, OMGGGGGGG. i wonder if i can change the screen, hmmmmm.

OH OH AND QIANWEN! I CHANGED MY TAGBOARD ESPECIALLY FOR YOU! cuz it really takes a long time for my old tagboard to load so i changed to cbox again. ladum!

i ran 2.4km in 11.36 minutes :DDDDDDDDDDDDD my goal was actually and i actually got a surprise when i heard tht my timing was 11.36! thts like :OOOOOOO. becase towards the 6th lap, i was like dying alrdy, which was unlike me. then the 8th lap, which was the last. i really wante to die. i badly wanted to stop but i know i cant. then i heard smone's breathing behind me. and then i realised it was eva's. haha smone i could tell it was her, and i knew she was going to overtake, and i was like good, all the btter. because i really cant stick to the first. i was the first af tthe third lap, i was expecting sam to go on in front of me to serve as motivation. but towards the third lap, she told i really cannot.... she seemed to be struggling with smthing thts painful. so i became the first, which isnt a good sign. i tend to slow down, i'll tend to not have any positive. i could badly chiong towards the last stretch.
oh oh ad ms yeo shouldnt have split us up ionto first and second half! i was so used to running with jiaqi! GRAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. as in you get motivation from eac otehr when you run together! thts why jiale and jasmine for encouragement from each other, lucky them. hahah so i could onl cheer jiaqi on! HAHAH! she came in second, just like meeeeeee :D

but actually, i wasnt very happy. not with the timing, but the way i performed. like wth -.- i actually felt like dying in the 6th , 7th lap. and when i finished i felt giddy and wanted to faint. my legs were soft and blahblahblah. so sickening. ppl ard me were fanning me, and my eyes couldnt open, they were glued to i dno wht. hahah and cherie was soooooooo nice! yay i love cherie. then aft th i felt hot on my arms and stomach (?!) then i thought wht happen until i realise it was yoko yoko tht i applied onto tht morning. hahha! lalala. i shall improve for next year and not feel like dying by the end of the run. yay jiayou!

im bored so im contantly blogging. its maths now. and we are suposed to draw graphs but im lazyyyyyyyyyy, jiale and jasmine are working so hard lah. siao ppl. so unlazy. they must learn from me! and know how to prioritize work. waha. they having a difficult time drawing graphs, i have a natural flair for it! haha egoego(: just like jiaqi who has a natural flair for writing, hmph. and she still dares to say she hates lang arts. now i wont believe her. she gets so high for lang arts luh! UNFAIRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR! i wish i can write so well too. tadum. yay my humanities! first time i got so high. FIRST TIME! omg omg omggggggggggggggggggggggg i cantg believe it! 18/25! thats so surprising! first time in my 2 and a half years can. yay and they are going to add an additional of 2 marks for everyone,maybe because the teacher's too strict. then it just proves even if she mark strict, i can get high, if shes not strict i can get even higher! HOHOHO.okay i was just rubbishing. i dont think i will get so high in the future. hai. 've been demoralising myself. i've been saying i suck but i came up with a theory!

if i suck, suck is a good thing,
therefore jiale rocks and i suck :D

birthdays arent really fun i've realised.

HELLO!!!! YAYYYYE I"M WRITING ON RACHEL"S BLOG! SO COOL! LALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALA. :D SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM

-.- okay anyway back to my entry. birthdays aren't fun. it in fact demoralises me. it let you come to realise that im not that zhong shi by ppl compared to another ppl. yeah, not that i demand to have whatever it is, or not that i want or crave to have it and not that i think whatever that is, is very impt. okay wiat how do i phrase it. hmm, not that i thinki whatever it is is the only way to express you know... aiyah whatever, i dont know. but its already TENth OF MAY and yeah im still like ...
jasmine was nice. gave me this cute door name plate thing. okay hahah and it was test week! haha so it was like I SO NICE RIGHT. okay that was jasmine and then back to the point that it was very sweet of her.she even went to walk around a few times to decide what to buy! hahha YAY i love jasmine! and my lovely junior! herlinda :D she gave me a pooh bear! i was super surprised :p and my mum also love it. haha she keep touching it, saying that it feels so nice and soft. and i got a niceniceniceeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee bag from haiyuan:DDDDDDDDDDDD yay super nice<3 and my mum gave me a surprise cake! hahhhhhhh, without other disturbing thoughts, bday is actually not bad. i got nice surprises. anyw i dno why im talking on and on and on abt my bday which is supposedly long ago. guess im sill hanging on to some stuff. yeah -.-

night blues, if there's ever such a thing. or else im just pmsing now. i need sleep. i need to swim. i need to stop thinking. im so stupid, slap my fingers for being so itchy to scroll down. i shall continue being emo. thankyouverymuch.

im just super bored. dont bother.

1. How old will you be in 10 months?
hmm, i'll be near to 16 haha!

2. Do you think you will get married by then?
haha yah im sure.

3. What do you look forward to most in the next 3 months?
july? nth much to lk forward to. sch reopens you see.

5. Who was the last person to call you?
eh. haiyuan(:

6. Do you prefer to call or text?
both :D

7. Do you have any pets?
nah.

8. What were you doing at 12am last night?
sleeping of course.

9. Are your parents married/separated/divorced?
married.

10. When is the last time you saw your mom?
not very long -.-

11. What happened at 11:00a.m?
i was in the library, digressing with my friends.

14. Do you prefer shoes, socks, or bare feet?
bare feeeeeet!

15. Are you a social person?
HOHO YES I AM!

16. What was the last thing you ate?
chocs.

17. What is your favourite ice cream?
cookies and cream! macadamia nut!

18. What is your favorite dessert?
ice cream? haha.

20. What kind of jelly do you like on?
JELLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

21. Do you like coffee?
eh not rly. prefer tea.

22. How many glasses of water a day do you drink on average??
i dont knw. quite a few.

23. What do you drink in the morning?
milo and water.

24. Would you rather sleep with someone else or alone?
SLEEP WITH SMONE! im sleepign wiht my sister now anyw. haha.

25. Do you sleep on a certain side of the bed?
whichever side. right left front. but not back. haha.

26. Do you know how to play poker?
guess so.

27. Do you like to cuddle?
yep.

28. Have you ever been to Canada?
no ); never been out of SEA. YES!

29. Do you eat out or at home more often?
at home more often.

30. Do you know anyone with the same birthday as you?
my godma.

32. Do you speak any other language?
chinese. haha.

34. Have you ever been in an ambulance?
eh no.and i dont want to:D

35. Do you prefer an ocean or a pool?
POOLS! <3

36. Do you prefer a window seat or an aisle seats?
whichever.

37. Do you know how to drive a stick shift?
ah?!

38. What is your favorite thing to spend money on?
:D

39. Do you wear any jewelery 24/7?
i dont even have any.

40. What is your favourite TV show?
wo bu zhi dao.

41. Can you roll your tongue?
yeah.

42. Who is the funniest person you know?
memeME! HAHAH

44. Are you on any medication?
nopenope(:

45. Do u have any clothes from when you were little?
uh not tht i know of.

46. What is the color of your bedroom
its just whitewashed.

48. Do you sleep with your closet doors opened or closed?
-.- i REALLLLLLLY sleep with them open yknw, really.

49. Would you rather be attacked by a big bear or a swarm of killer bees?
er er. no thankyou.

50. Do you flirt a lot?
dont even do tht. yay

im finally posting. but its not going to be very long. perhaps another time. when im not as pissed. im pissed at blogger. blogger sucks sucks sucksssssssss. february passed april massed and now its may. soon june is coming. wah, time sure passed fast ): (: haha i dont knw it shld be a gd thing or bad thing so yep. shall post another time which will be long long long long later. ladum!

BACK FROM OBS(:
yayyy im back from OBS! i finally got back my comfy bed, my nicenice bath and clean clean clothes. AND! i do not have to get sticky nordo i have to apply so many insect repellant and sunblock all over me. andandand again! i dont have to sleep with the smell of insect repellant or the dirty tent; or live with the pitching and unpitching of the tent every day/night. yeah man. i can go on complaining and complaining. but i shant :p it was melwee's bday ytd! so, HAPPY BIRTHDAY MELWEE! I LOVE YOUUUU! i shall now do a quiz because im lazy to continue blogging.

Do you prefer to sleep or talk to a friend when it gets boring in class?
talk to my friend! and if i can, i sms!

Do you wave hi with a smile or a serious face?
SMILE LUH!

One thing that you like about your house?
EVERYTHING! obs made me realise that :D

The last time you cried, is it because of someone?
yeah. and the usual.

Chocolate ice cream or chocolate bar?
bar! i only want yogurt icecream now ):

What's the good thing about schooling?
talking to my frnd.

Last song you downloaded?
hmm i cant rmb. its quite long ago actually.

Which part of your body is itchy and aching now?
alot of my parts of body is itching. and its super irritating.

Worms or cockroaches?
say noooooooooooo.

Yawn with your eyes open or closed?
open.

In one word, describe your day:
normal typical day.

What website(s) do you have open?
open? er blog and frndster?

You listen to music when you are..?
when i want to.

What song are you listening to now?
no song.

The latest news you've received?
what do you mean by news.

Last clothing item you bought?
obs shirt. HAHA

Name 5 things you have around you:
phone, pc, waterbottle, earpiece, pencilcase

What can't you live without?
people around me, asfgl.

State the date, day and time at this moment:
-.- go look at it yourself.

What do people think when they first meet you?
im crazy.

What color is your hair?
black.

Natural/dyed?
natural, and im super proud of it. black is the nicest colour for your hair man.

What was the last book you bought?
haha i cant rmb!

Do you like reading?
uh hmm :D

Do you like answering surveys?
haha not bad!

Last thing you did?
this?

Two things that people don't know about you?
actually im serious yknw!

Are you a frequent user of Friendster?
not really. friendster can kill you see.

COMPLETE THESE SENTENCES
I like it when...
im with people i love.

I love it when..
im with people i love more(:

1.What kind of first impression do you think people think when they first see you?
i dont know? i only knew last time it was dao.

2. What is one thing you like to do alone?
i dont rly like to do things alone if i can help it. but it'd be study alone. cuz i can only study when im alone. as in really concetrate. unless theres someone beside me to teach me. thgn it'd be okay(:

3. What is your favorite line to say when you are drunk?
I don't know, I don't drink.

4. How many drinks do u need before u get tipsy?
Don't know. heh definitely not much.

5. Do you have any purpose for living?
you don't need a purpose to live.

6. What kind of books do you like to read?
one that atracts me.

7. Do you think you're cute?
no -.-

8. Do you have a problem changing clothes in front of your friends?
shirt, no. but they have a problem with me changing shirt in front of them. well ms delinesoh approves and encourages that anyw.

9. What do you eat/drink when you raid the fridge at night?
fruits, fruit jelly and chocs!

10. Describe your bed?
two singlesized bed.

11. Spontaneous or planned?
both!

12. Do you know how to play poker?
yessssssssssss

13. What do you carry with you at all times?
my phone i think. no, definitely my watch. hahah!

14. What do you miss most about being a kid?
well it can be everything or it can be nothing.

15. Are you happy with your given name?
yep(:

16. What color is your bedroom?
er wht colour? i dont knw :/

17. Have you ever been in a play?
of course luh

18. Do you like yourself and believe in yourself?
haha i dont knw if i like myself or not.

19. Do you consider yourself to be a nice person?
IM NICEEEEEEEE

20. Do you spend more time with your girlfriend/boyfriend or your friends?
well consideringh school, its friends.

21. What's one thing you wish you could do but can't?
hahaha alot of things.

22. What is your ideal wedding location?
oh church. haha of course. honeymoon is another thing.

23. Whats one instrument you wish you could play?
DRUMS and GUITAR!

24. Whats one language you want to learn?
malay. HAHA.

25. Have you ever pierced your body parts & where have you pierce before?
nope. im very guai.

26. Do you have any tattoos?
nah. told you im guai alrdy.

27. What's one trait you hate in a person?
i can hate alot of traits in one person

28. Do you consider yourself materialistic?
no, i nvr was.

29. What do you cook best?
heh. HEH

30. Favorite person/s to talk with on the phone?
youyouYOU!

31. What's your favourite colour?
green and orange is the love!

I MISS 2o4!!!
okay so i know many other ppl miss 2o4 and all. but i really really REALLY do miss 2o4!!! regardless of the unhappy stuff that happened or what not, i miss 2o4. i miss all my rly gd frnds. bestest bestest frnds! I MISS ELAINE! KAIYU! CHUINYIN! MELWEEEEEEEE! JODIEEEEE! DEB! YIYI! and not to forget nice nice nice ppl like jiamin!! yingyan!! omg school has always been looked forward to because i have lessons with them! now theres nth nice or exciting in sch to lk forward anymore ):
I LOVE MY 2o4'o6!

insecure is the word.

AWAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY(:

Seems like just yesterday
You were a part of me
I used to stand so tall
I used to be so strong
Your arms around me tight
Everything, it felt so right
Unbreakable, like nothin' could go wrong
Now I can't breathe
No, I can't sleep
I'm barely hanging on

Here I am, once again
I'm torn into pieces
Can't deny it, can't pretend
Just thought you were the one
Broken up, deep inside
But you won't get to see the tears I cry
Behind these hazel eyes

I told you everything
Opened up and let you in
You made me feel alright
For once in my life
Now all that's left of me
Is what I pretend to be
So together, but so broken up inside
'Cause I can't breathe
No, I can't sleep
I'm barely hangin' on

Swallow me then spit me out
For hating you, I blame myself
Seeing you it kills me now
No, I don't cry on the outside
Anymore...

the second time i feel so numb that i scare myself. only, only this time, its worse.

im too busybody, thts what causing me the pain and hurt now. its my fault, me to blame. im always probing into other ppl's business and i always, really always, end up hurting and crying and all the shit. but i wouldnt have knw if i didn't probe. maybe, maybe, maybe its time to rethink.

1.Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?
yup i would.

2.What song describes your relationship status?
eh i not sure.

3.How much does your dog weigh?
no dog!

5. Ever waxed your legs?
NO. haha.

6.Earings or necklaces?
and because i have no earholes, necklaces.

7.Who have you talked to most today?
nobody, i've been STONING the whole day, and slept as well.

8.What is the oldest message in your inbox on your phone?
haha im lazy to on my phone.

9.Friend of the opposite sex that lives closest to you?
haha i dont knw, dont care, dont want to knw.

10.Color of your shirt?
yellow yellow.

11.How many years have you been taking a language?
taking a language? hmm i dno.

12.Whos on speed dial 5?
dont use speed dial(:

13.what color is your background on your computer mainly?
lots of colours.

14.Do you wish on 11:11?
huh, am i supposedly to wish at that time?

16. Are you a bad influence?
hahahahaha. noooooooooooo.

17.What color are your eyes?
blackish brown.

18.Would you rather have your name or your siblings name?
MY NAME!:D

19.Would you do anything for someone?
yep.

20.Have you ever been called a #####?
if thats a bitch then yes

21.Biggest success so far in life?
not sure :l

22.Do you use smiley faces on the computer a lot?
haha moderately bah

23.what song is on?
its off.

24.Last time you didn't go to school?
what?

25. Are your grades good?
soso lah.

26. Do you have any friends with benefits?
ah???????

27. Would you date anyone on your top friends?
nope.

28. Does your best friend have a myspace/friendster?
haha yep!

29. Whose page did you last visit?
page? some ah lianzxzxzxz who came to view my profile.

30.Last time you went out to lunch?
wed.

31. Would you rather be in a relationship that was a lie and be happy for a while or not be in it at all?
NOT BE IN IT AT ALL OF COURSE!!!!

1. Full name: Soon Jia Wei RACHEL
2. Name backwards: lehcar iew aij noos.
3. Meaning of the name: hahha i dno.
4. Nicknames: DEEDEE! hahaa the nick is so cute.
5. Screenname: ah>
6. D.O.B: 220492
7.Place of birth: Singapore
8. Nationality: Singaporean
9. Current location: on a seat(:
10. Star sign: Taurus.
11. Religion: catholic, yay yay.
12. Height: 162.5cm grah, i stopped growing.
13. Weight: jin tian tian qi hen hao hor.
14. Shoe size: 6 or 7 i cant rmb.
15. Hair colour: black!!
16. Eye colour: blackish brown.
17. Who do you think you look like?: they say i lk like my mum. so my mum shld be happy. hahah okay nvm -.-
18. Innie or outie?: outie?
19. Lefty or righty: Righty! lefty! both sama.
20. Gay, straight, bi or others:im STRAIGHTTTTTTTTTTT. but i was BI hahaha.
21. Best friends: alot.
22. Best friends you trust most: elaine kaiyu melwee jodie deb cy they all lo.
23. Favourite pals: as above.
24. Best friends of opposite sex: hmmm no have. haha.
25. Best buddies: -.- isnt this like repeated?
26. Boyfriend or girlfriend: :D
27. Crush: i have no crush. ladum:P
28. Parents: yeah, thanks for asking. i still have both of them.
29. Worst enemies: hahha no enemies lah.
30. Favourite online guy: huh i dont even knw any online guy now. as in contact.
31. Craziest friend: hmm hahha i have alot of crazy friends.
32. Advice friend: i go to many ppl for advice.
33. Loudest friend: hahah er basically, im the loudest.
34. Person you cry with: myself lah.
35. Any sisters?: one
36. Any brothers?: one
37. Any pets?: nah nah.
38. Any diseases?: NOPE
39. Pager?: hahha im living in the 21st century.
40. Personal phone line: no.
41. Phone: nokia. i want change my phone.
42. Lava lamp: ??
43. Pool or hot tub: POOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL.
44. A car?: hmmm i no need a car
45. Your personality: im complicated and most of all SLOW SPASTIC RANDOM.
46. Driving: not yet.
47. Room: comfy.
48. What's missing: in my room? tv!
49. School: nygh.
50. Bed: comfy too!
51. Relationship with parents: okay lah.
52. Believe in yourself: yes i do.
53. Believe in love at first sight: nah,
54. Good listener: yepppppppppp.
55. Get along well with parents: isnt this the same as 51? whts your problem?!
56. Save email conversations?: msn conver? yeah, automatically.
57. Pray: every night.
58. Believe in reincarnation: i hope there is.
59. Make fun of people: hahaha yah.
60. Like to talk on the phone: yeah.
61. Want to get married: HAHA I CANT WAIT :PPPP
62. Like to drive: its fun.
63. Motion sickness: at times, then i'll feel like puking.
64. Eat stem of broccoli: i dont like.
65. Eat chicken with fork: im getting irritated with qns like these.
66. Dream in colour: yesssss.
67. Type with your fingers on home row: eh?
68. Sleep with stuffed animals: hahah no. so GAO WHEI! HAHA.
69. Next to you: empty chair.
70. On the walls of your room: paint.
71. On your mousepad: mouse.
72. Dream car: not again.
73. Dream date?: with the person i love.
74. Dream honeymoon spot: choice of the person i love lah of course.
75. Dream husband/wife: haha i no need to dream abt that.
76. Bedtime: nowadays its 12smth.
77. Under your bed: dust dirt.
78. Single most important question: what?
79. Bad time of the day: morning!
80. Your worst fear: rejection? thats in the DISC thingo. i think its quite correct.
81. The weather is: wet
82. Time: 4.02
83. Date: 22nd
84. Best trick done on someone: hmm dno. i dont keep track on these stuff and i dont go anrd tricking ppl!
85. Theme song: no theme song lah.
86. Hardest thing about growing up: everything is hard.
87. Funniest experience: HAHA
88. Scariest experience: cant decide.
89. Silliest thing I've ever said: i can spend the whole day saying silly stuff. just ask arnd :D
90. Most desperate and funniest thing you've ever done with an opposite sex: depesperate? huh?
91. Scariest thing when you're with your friends?: theres nth scary when im with friends.
92. Worst feeling: theres ALOT of worst feelings.
93. Best feeling in the world: alot too! being loved and wanted and being rmbed!

1. Does anyone know your password to your email?
` uh hmm(:

2. What was the last thing you ordered?
` dont knw!

3. Are you an emotional person?
` hahah you can say that.

4. Do you like your name?
` yep!

5. Do you believe in love at first sight?
` nah.

6. Ever felt jealous of your friend?
` hahah yeah i guess.

7. What was the last thing you did?
` typing this?

8. Who is right next to you?
` human.

9. Who was the last person you ate with?
` my family.

10. What song are you listening to right now?
` not listening to any.

11. How's the weather right now?
` raining like shit. i want swim!!

12. Last person who called you today?
` no one called me today :(

14. Last song you sang?
` we're all in this together!HAHA

15. Last time you danced?
` cant rmb

16. Lost a friendship over something stupid?
` perhaps.

18. Last thing you ate?
` beancurd.

19. Been really depressed before?
` fei hua.

20. Faked being sick to miss school?
` haha no. im like so guai.

21. What time did you wake up today?
` 9.30.

22. Current taste?
` no taste.

23. Who is the person that posted this survey?
` some ah lian. and i cant stand the way she type her answers. lala.

24. What are you wearing right now?
` shirt and shorts o.0

25. Are you too shy to ask anyone out?
` haha NOPE. well maybe yeah, i cant possible ask ANYONE out.

26. What is the first thing you notice about the opposite sex?
` i dont rly knw.

27.Where are you right now?
` HOME. I WANT TO GO OUT

28. What date and day is it?
` 22nd!!!! wed.

29. Did you go anywhere today?
` great world.

30. What did you do there?
` buy stuff. nosy :P

31. How old are you?
` 15 in EXACTLY 5 months.

33. Are you mature or immature?
` haha immature, yay.

34. Do you call your parents by their first name?
` nope.

35. Are you an only child?
` noooooooooo.

36. Where do you go shopping?
` where there are thigns i want.

37. Do you like where you work?
` haha i dont work. but i want to.

38. Do you like books?
` haha yeah, im a bookworm.

39. Do you want to get married?
` hahah YEAH I SO WANT TO.

40. To whom?
` YOUYOUYOU :p

WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON THAT....

1. Made you smile? >> the tv person.

2. Saw you cry? >> i dno. i havent been crying for quite awhile. yay.

3. Went to the movies with you? >> long long time ago with elaine, melwee, jodie, deborah, cy.

4. You talked on the phone? >> cant rmb :l

W O U L D. Y O U. R A T H E R?

1. Pierce your nose or tongue? >> YUCK NONE.

2. Be serious or be funny? >> funny.

3. Drink whole or skim milk? >> i havent been drinking milk.

4. Die in a fire or drown? >> CHOI.

5. Spend time with your parents or enemies? >> PARENTS :D

D O. Y O U. P R E F E R.

1. Flowers or candy? >> flowers.

2. Gray or black? >> black.

3. Color or Black and white photos? >> it depends on what photos.

4. Lust or love? >> LOVE DUH.

5. Sunrise or sunset? >> sunrise

6. M&Ms or Skittles? >> M&Ms. i like sour skittles too!!

7.Staying up late or waking up early?>> waking up early.

A N S W E R. T R U T H F U L L Y !!
1. Do you like anyone? >> i like alot of my friends!

2. Ever recorded a sexual act on video? >> NO -.-

3. Have you taken a picture naked? >> NOOOOOO

4. Do you fall for the wrong guy or girl? >> no.

D O. Y O U. P R E F E R..

1. Sun or moon? >> sun.

2. Snickers or ? >> i prefer the ?

3. Left or right? >> hahah no preference. i like both my left and right.

4. 10 acquaintances or having two best friends? >> 2 best friends obviously.

5. Sunny or rainy? >> rainy! on night that is, so i can sleep sleep sleep :p

6. Vanilla ice cream or chocolate ice cream? >> vanilla. choc is nice too!

A B O U T. Y O U!

1. What time is it? >> 12.00am exactly.

2. Name? >> rachel

3. Nickname(s): >> ah soon, weiwei.

4. What is your birth date? >> 22ndapr

5. What do you want right this second? >> :D

6. Where do you want to live? >> in my house.

7. How many kids do you want? >> less than 5. haha.

8. You want to get married? >> yep!

U N I Q U E !

1.Can you roll your tounge? >> haha yeah. you count this UNIQUE?! weird.

O T H E R
1. Do you twirl your spaghetti or cut it? >> twirl. cut for what.

2. Have you ever eaten Spam? >> ah?

3. Favorite ice cream? >> cookiesncream! vanilla! macademia brittle!

4. How many kinds of cereal are in your cabinet? >> banana nut crunch

5. What's your favorite type of soda? >> dont rly like soda.

6. Do you cook? >> i can (:

I N .T H E. L A S T. M O N T H , H A V E. Y O U?

1. had a crush? >> no new ones.

2. Bought something: >> uh huh.

3. Sang: >> like everyday. hahah.

5. Been hugged: >> yeah.

6. Felt stupid: >> i seem to be always feeling stupid.

7. Missed someone?: >> super many.

8. Danced crazy: >> haha not rly.

9. Gotten your hair cut? >> nope.

10. Cried: >> in the last month. i think i did.

11. Lied: >> haha yeah.

12. Stole anything? >> nah.

3o2!
WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!! WHERES MY CLASS 3o3?!!?
ky and deb got into 3o3. elaine and cy got into 3o4. im like so alone. can die can die can die. HAI. i shld be a bit more stupid.maths get lesser can alrdy. AHHHHHHHHHH CRY CRY!! WE SHOULD ALL BE IN 3o3!! no im serious, we rly shld.

1. WOULD YOU GET BACK WITH YOUR LAST EX IF YOU COULD?
i dont have a ex.

2.WHAT KIND OF SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING?
t shit -.-

3. WOULD YOU KISS ANYONE ON YOUR FRIEND'S LIST?
hmm no.

4. DO YOU HAVE "A THING" FOR ANYONE ON YOUR TOP FRIENDS LIST?
my top friends list? they all consist of my girl friends. so what do you think :p

5. HOW MANY PEOPLE ON YOUR LIST DO YOU KNOW IN REAL LIFE?
cant be bothered to count.

6. HOW MANY KIDS DO YOU WANT TO HAVE?
:D

7. DO YOU HAVE A GOOD RELATIONSHIP WITH BOTH YOUR PARENTS?
er. well its okay i guess.

9. WOULD YOU EVER MAKE OUT WITH SOMEONE OF THE SAME SEX?
haha no way.

10. WHAT DID YOU DO FOR YOUR LAST B-DAY?
nth much.

12. WHAT TIME DID YOU WAKE UP TODAY?
nearing 9. my mum just have to wake me up.

13. WHAT WERE YOU DOING AT MIDNIGHT THREE NIGHTS AGO?
watching anime. HEEHEE

14. DO YOU LIKE HAVING YOUR HAIR PULLED?
depends how hard. btu generally, NO.

15. NAME SOMETHING YOU CAN'T WAIT TO DO?
GO OUTTTTTTTTT!

16. LAST TIME YOU SAW YOUR MOM?
3 mins ago.

17. WHAT IS ONE THING YOU WISH YOU COULD CHANGE ABOUT YOURSELF?
hmm i got many things.

18. IF YOU HAD 250,000 DOLLARS... WHAT WOULD YOU DO WITH IT?
save some spend some give some donate some.

19. HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN AT YOUR CURRENT JOB?
jobless :D

20. HAVE YOU EVER TALKED TO TOM?
huh -.- hahha

21. DESCRIBE WHAT UNDERWEAR ARE YOU WEARING?
white plain. were you expecting g string?

22. LAST THING YOU ATE?
orange! <3

23. WHATS YOUR FAVORITE MONTH?
apr.

24. YOUR LEAST FAVORITE MONTH?
hmm no least fav.

25. WHAT'S THE LAST PIECE OF CLOTHING YOU BORROWED FROM ANYONE??
i dont rmb borrowing anyone's clothing.

26. WHO IS GETTING ON YOUR NERVES RIGHT NOW?
haha not who but what! my classo7 that is

27. MOST VISITED WEBPAGE?
some anime page. haha.

28. LAST PERSON YOU TEXT MESSAGED?
haiyuan(:

29. LAST PERSON TO MAKE YOU SAD?
mum

30. WOULD YOU TAKE A BULLET FOR YOUR BEST FRIEND?
if you're quick enough, you can dodge it.

31. FAVORITE KIND OF DRINK?
fruit juice! or plain water will just do :D

32. HAVE YOU BEEN TO AUSTRALIA?
nah.

35. IF SOMEONE YOU HATED DIED, WHAT WOULD YOU DO?
neutral.

AHHHHHHHHH! THEY PUT UP THE CLASS ALLOCATION LIST TODAY!!! LIKE HELLO?! TODAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!?!? GRAH. I SHOULD HAVE GONE TO SCHOOL TODAY :(

NEW SPECS :D
but its uncomfortable. i cant get used to it. no i mean literally cant get used to it. HOWWWWWWWWWWWW?! NOW I REALISED HOW NICE AND COMFY MY OLD ONE WAS. GRAH. and i think i need to learn to stop straining my right eye :(

i think i have serious PMS problems to deal with. blahhhh.

1. Would you marry for money?
no -.- thats stupid.

2. Have you had braces?
hmm i shld.

3. Could you live without a computer?
yeah.

4. If you could live in any past time
right now is fine(:

5. Do you drink enough water?
haha yeah. water<3

6. Do you wear shoes in the house or take 'em off?
take them off luh

7. What are your favorite fruits?
ALOT! I LOVE FRUITS. FRUITS LOVE ME :D

8. What is your favorite place to visit?
depends who! haha

9. Are you photogenic?
NO :(

10. Do you dream in color or black and white?
colour. hahaha.

11. Why did you take this survey??
because im bored and also for ppl like melwee to kop.

12. Do you drink alcohol?
nah.

13. What is the most beautiful language?
chinese? english? hahaha.

14. Do you like being kissed when you are asleep?
how i know.

15. WHAT do you like MOST: Sunrise or sunset?
sunrise. its like the beginning of a new day.

16. Do you want to live until you're 100 yrs old?
er not rly.

19. When you watch movies at home, do you like the lights?
sui bian!

20. Do you believe in magic?
haha no. but i like harry potter movie still!

22. Do you like to watch cartoons?
seldom watch but i like!! :p

23. At what age did you find out that Santa Claus wasn't real?
i always knew he wasnt real.

24. Do you write poems?
hhaha not rly. i prefer analysing them.

25. Do you snore?
nope.

26. You sleep more on your back, front,or sides?
front and sides.

27. Would you rather have a poodle or a rottweiler?
? none.

28. Are you basically a happy person?
hahah yeah. im a happy and mad girlllllllll!

29. Are you tired?
you can say that.

30. Did you drink anything with caffeine?
hmmm yeah.

32. How many landline/cellphones do you have in your house?
5.

33. Do you get along with your parents?
er at times :l

34. Do u smoke?
smoking is disgustingzxzxzxzxzxz.

35. Do you have a cat?
no.

36. Have you ever had a birthday party?
hahah hmmm YES when i was p2! once in my lifetime. blah.

37. What do you do when you're sad?
write diary, talk to ppl

38. What do you need most now?
you thats who!

39. What song are you listening to now?
hey juliet - LMNT

40. What are you craving right now?
choco! yay you reminded me. i shall go eat some later.

41. What is your current mood?
neutral.

42. What kind of handphone you own?
nokia. its crap lah the model.

43. Honestly,what is on your mind now?
whowhowho is on my mind!

1. do you wear a bra to sleep?
- haha no -.-

2. have u kissed any one on ur top 8?
- top 8? what thing?

3. are you happy with your looks?
- hahah okay lah soso lor.

4. do you think you are pretty/gorgeous/beautiful?
- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. siao.

5. are you a girly girl?
- hahah hardly (:

6. do you straighten/gel your hair everyday?:
- hahaha nah.

7. do you hate cramps?
- you men there are ppl who actually like them?!

8. are you tall/short for ur age?:
- soso lah.

9. do you like someone right now?
- loveeeeeeeeeeee(:

10. what would you do if someone smacked your butt?
- depends who.

11. Has anyone touched/smacked your butt in the past?
- haha yup.

12. do you think you're conceited?
- nah.

13. do you like drama?
- okay lo.

14. are you a bitch?:
- NO. HAHAH YAY

15. Have you ever gotten in a catfight?
- haha er no

16. who would you like to smack right now?
- nobody im nice!

17. which class is most boring in school?
- chinese? geog? science?

18. What class do you love the most?
- geog. hahaha cuz i can talk and sms more freely.

19. is there any type of rumor going around about you?
-right now? hope not.

20. do you call anybody by there last name?
- last name? eh dont think so.

21. how many guys do u think will end up reading?
- reading this thing? how i know? like one i guess. hahah.

Q: WHAT MADE YOU SMILE TODAY?
A: hmm i dont know. my memory seriously suck man. but i do rmb i smile a couple of times.

Q: WHAT WERE YOU DOING AT 8 THIS MORNING?
A: preparing to go to church.

Q: WHAT WERE YOU DOING 15 MINUTES AGO?
A: looking at quizzes.

Q: CAN YOU SING?
A: UH HMMMMM! :D

Q: SOMETHING THAT HAPPENED TO YOU IN 1995?
A: i walked.

Q: LAST THING YOU SAID ALOUD?
A: i cant rmb. omg :O

Q: HOW MANY DIFFERENT THINGS DID YOU DRINK TODAY?
A: soup, water, do you drink yogurt?

Q: WHAT COLOR IS YOUR TOOTHBRUSH?
A; blue and green!

Q: LAST THING YOU BOUGHT?
A: no idea :l

Q: LAST GIFT YOU RECEIVED FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY?
A: no idea.

Q: WHERE DO YOU KEEP YOUR CHANGE?
A: um. pocket if my wallet is not arnd.

Q: WHAT'S THE WEATHER LIKE TODAY?
A: soso.

Q: BEST ICE CREAM FLAVOR?
A: cookiesn'cream! vanilla! lime! chocolate! macademia brittle! ALOOOOOOT!

Q: SOMETHING YOU ARE EXCITED ABOUT?
A: i dno. im tired now, so dont ask me.

Q: LAST RAINBOW YOU SAW?
A: omg that was long ago.

Q: WHAT SIZE SHOE DO YOU WEAR?
A: arnd 6-7.

Q: WHAT ARE YOU DOING RIGHT NOW?
A: doing this -.-

Q: DO YOU WANT TO CUT YOUR HAIR?
A: should be.

Q: DO YOU TALK A LOT?
A: too much :p

Q: DO YOU MAKE UP YOUR OWN WORDS?
A: hahahah not rly.

Q: ARE YOU TICKLISH?
A: HAHA ASK LAURALEE, JIAMIN ANDAND HAIYUAN. they can tell you.

Q: ARE YOU TYPICALLY A JEALOUS PERSON?
A: very.

Q: 4TH PERSON ON YOUR MISSED CALLS?
A: jodie.

Q: WHAT DID THE LAST TEXT MESSAGE YOU RECEIVED SAY?:
A: inbox no message.

Q: DO YOU CHEW ON YOUR STRAWS?
A: used to, but i changed that habit!

Q: DO YOU HAVE CURLY HAIR?
A: abit, like wavy wavy.

Q: WHAT IS THE NEXT CONCERT YOU'RE GOING TO?
A: i nvr been to any concert before. haha bleah

Q: WHAT SAYING DO YOU SAY A LOT?
A: it changes. i keep saying bai chi now. my mum and sis is getting influenced by me.

Q: WHAT IS THE LAST THING YOU ATE?
A: pear lah.

Q: WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU SAID TO SOMEONE, AND WHO WAS IT?
A: i havent speak for along time.

Q: DO YOU WATCH TV?
A: yeah.

Q: DO YOU LIKE ANYONE?
A: i do love.

Q: EVER BEEN HUNTING?
A. no. hunting is a crime.

Q: IS MARRIAGE IN YOUR FUTURE?
A: of course!

Q: WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU SAID "I LOVE YOU" AND MEANT IT
A: this qn is so repeated.

Q: DO YOU HAVE A NICKNAME?
A: like ah soon, weiwei, rochelly?! haha okay nvm.

Q: DO YOU BELIEVE IN LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT?
A: no.

Q: YOUNGEST PERSON IN YOUR FAMILY?
A: my sis.

Q: ARE YOU A HEAVY SLEEPER?
A: depends how tired i am(:

Q: LAST TIME YOU USED A SKATEBOARD?
A: i nvr rly used a skateboard.

Q: BEST MOVIE YOU'VE SEEN IN THE PAST TWO WEEKS?
A: flushed away? :D

Q: WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?
A: ju hua tai!

1. Who is the last person you high-fived?
melwee! i can still rmb :p

2. If you were drafted into a war, would you survive?
hahha yeah cuz i'll escape. quick.

3. Do you sleep with the TV on?
i no tv in my room. and even if i have, i wont leave it on. so noisy.

4. Have you ever drank milk straight out of thecarton?
yeah.

5. Have you ever won a spelling bee?
theres no spelling bee competition i heard so like yep.

7. How fast can you type?
not bad im typing like super fast right now cuz i dno why also. when the feel is right, everything comes right.

8. Are you afraid of the dark?
at times yes.

9. Eye color?
black?

10. Worst fear?
i dno i got alot of fears. very insecure person.

11. When is the last time you bathed ?
JUST NOW! so shu fu :DD

12. Do you knock on wood?
huh? eh i guess so , hahah.

13. Are you drinking anything right now?
nope. now you mentioned it, i feel like drinking smth.

14. Are you attractive?
nahhhhhhh

15. Can you hoola hoop?
i used to! now i can only do like 3 rounds then drop. need to pick up the skill soon.

16. Are you good at keeping secrets?
i can. but its good to share secrets abt your gd friends whatttttttt.

17. What do you want for Christmas?
LOVE(:

18. Do you know the Muffin Man:
i want to know! sounds friendly and yummy.

19. Do you talk in your sleep?
nope, i think i sleep like a dead log HAHA.

20. Who wrote the book of love?
theres such a book?

21. Have you ever flown a kite?
hahah no but ms yeo always tell us take $2 go fly kite. man, i do miss those times.

24. how many people are on your contact listof your cell?
cant be bothered to count.

25. Have you ever asked for a pony?
?!?! FOR WHAT?!

26. Plans for tomorrow?
trng.

27. Can you juggle?
i want to learn! its cool.

28. Missing someone now?
yeah lots.

29. When was the last time you told someone 'I love you' and really meant it?
today.

31. How are you feeling today?
soso.

32. Are you black?
er no.

33. Have you ever been suspended or expelled from school?
nooooooooo and not possible. im like guai!(:

34. What are you looking forward to?
nth.

35. Have you ever crawled through a window?
hahaha yeah. certainly not fun.

37. Have you ever eaten dog food?
nooooo.

38. Can you handle the truth?
depends what.

39. Do you like ham?
hahah not bad.

40. What 3 things can always be found in your refrigerator?
CHOCOLATE!DRINKS! FRUITS!!!!!!<3

41. Any cool scars?
no. scars are not even cool in the first place.

42. Do you like or have a crush on anyone?
crush is too minor a word.

43. How many kids do you plan on having?
hmm difficult to say :p HAHA I LOVE KIDS YAY.

44. What do you do when no one is watching?
huh nth? who cares if anyone's watching or not haha.

45. Are you in love?
yep!(:

46. Do you talk to yourself?
yes -.-

47. Do you like dancing?
hahah okay bah. you shld see melwee dance! damn cool.

48. Three of your favorite tv shows:
hmm none at the moment. either that or i too lazy to think.

49. Two things about the opposite sex that appeal to you:
1) their eyes.
2) the way they talk and interact.

50. Who are you thinking about right now?
dont tell you!

51. Who did you last talk to on the phone?
haiyuan. hahaha:D

52. Where is your phone?
right in front of me.

53. What was the last thing you ate?
pear?

54. What is your favorite color?
URGH. stop asking this qn.

55. What is the last movie watched?
FLUSHED AWAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

56. What song do you currently listen to?
ting mama de hua.

57. Are you currently suffering from a broken heart?
NO! heh

DO YOU HAVE A FRIEND?
` fei hua -.-

CAN YOU STAY AT HOME FOR 1 WEEK?
` uh huh! as long as i have my phone, com and tv im fine :D

WHICH DO YOU PREFER, SCIENCE OR MATH?
` science!! yay.

WHAT DO YOU LIKE, CELLPHONE OR T.V.?
` cell

FLIP FLOPS OR SNIKERS?
` flip flops .

HERO OR VILLAIN??
` depends who plays the role :p

ASHLEY TISDALE OR VANESSA ANNE HUDGENS?
` eh ashley tisdale for acting and vanessa.a.h for vocals.

DRUM LOVER OR GUITAR LOVER?
` both!
.
ANIME OR CARTOONS?
` haha BOTHBOTH!

DO YOU WANNA BE A SINGER?
` not rly. but i still want to singsingSING.

WHAT COLOR DO YOU PREFER ON A DOG?
` hmm depends which breed mah.

DO YOU KNOW HOW TO DANCE?
` just have to learn the steps.

WHEN YOU GET HURT,DO YOU CRY??
` hurt as in? i guess i would anyw, haha.

DO YOU LOVE TAKING PICTURES OF YOURSELF?
` haha not rly. so ma fan.

CITY OR COUNTRY?
` both!

JEANS OR SKIRTS?
` skirts. i lk fat in jeans.

HAVE A FRIEND THAT SEEMS TO BE A BOY/GIRL?
` er? i suppose so.

GOT BORED IN SCHOOL?
` many a times.

LOVE MSN MESSENGER?
` not bad. just that i hardly use it.

DO YOU ALWAYS CALL YOUR FRIENDS DUDE?
` never. it sounds so noob.

MUSIC LOVER?
` yeppp.

WHAT COLOUR U LIKE?
` why is it always this qn.

HAVE A BF/GF?
` YESSSSSSSSSS :D

DO U HAVE FEELS FOR SOMEONE? WHO??
` hahaha YESYES many many feels.

DO U SMOKE?
` NO. ANTI SMOKE! ANTIANTIANTI

01. Eyeliner or mascara?
=eyeliner.

02. Disney films or scary films?
=disney! :D

03. Skirts or jeans?:
=skirts.

04. Socks or leggings?:
= ankle socks!

05. Hoodies or jackets?:
=jackets

06. Heels or sneakers?:
=sneakers! heels are uncomfortable :l

07. Straight or curly hair?:
= depends. but straight i guess (:

08. Hoop or dangling earrings?:
= dangling! but i have no ear piercings, so haha!

09. Side bangs or one lengthed?:
= eh?

10. Your favorite color(s):
= say orange green black white!

11. Victoria's Secret or Bath & Body Shop?:
= none.

12. Smoothies or lattes?:
= BOTH!

13. Diet or regular sodas?
= fruit juice :P

14. Water or daiquiris?:
= water is healthy

15. Diamonds or pearls?:
=diamonds, pearls are like too pearly?

16. Mary-Kate or Ashley Olsen?:
= nope to both.

17. This or That?:
= that! nicer to pronounce, hehe.

18. iPod or cell phone?:
= CELLLLLLLLLLLL. jodie wld choose iPod i guess, hahaa.

19. Friends or family?:
= can i choose both and MORE?

20. Manicure or pedicure?:
= hahah. what a question. i dont need both.

21. Love or peace
= love and peace are both impt yknw but i'll still go for LOVE!

22. Sunglasses or purses?:
= ourses. i dont have a habit of wearing sunglasses.

What you have:
[ ] An MP3 player/ipod/anything like that.
[ ] Jewelry. (i hardly have accessories)
[x] A computer.
[ ] A cd player.
[ ] A stereo.
[ ] A spice girl cd
[ ] A cosmo magazine.
[x] A teddy bear.
[ ] A build a bear.
[ ] An American Eagle purse.
[ ] A hot topic shirt.
[ ] An abercrombie shirt/sweater.
[ ]The mean girls dvd.
[ ] A TV in my room.
[ ] Diamond earrings.
[ x A pearl necklace/bracelets.
[ ] A homecoming/prom dress.
[x] A book.
[ ] A myspace.
[ ] Perfume or spray.
[x] A black shirt.
[x] Pink nail polish.

Girl Knowledge:
Do you know exactly where the blush goes?
= uh huh!

Would you say you know how to put on make up?
= yeah i know. definitely.

Do you know how to french braid?
=somehow i guess! but havent really tried it out yet.

Do you wash your face at least once a day?
yeah.

Do you know what kind of lip stick make your teeth look whiter?
=nopeee. i dont like using lipstick.

Do you use an eyelash curler?
= haha no. i dont see the need.

Do you use waterproof mascara?
=nah.

[x] Held hands
[x] Lost someone
[x] Never got a chance to tell someone
something important
[x] Cried my eyes out
[x] Danced
total: 5

[x] Rejected someone
[x] Wanted to kill someone
[x] Got called a slu*t/wh*ore
[x] Heard a rumour about yourself
[x] Hurt someone
total: 5

[x] Got involved in sports
[ ] Got called a dork
[ ] Fell out of love
[x] Went to a funeral
[ ] Know someone who has commited suicide
total: 2

[x] Wrote a love song/poem
[x] Went through a phase
[ ] Got ditched
[x] Know someone really stupid and/or annoying
total: 3

[ ] Drank
[x] Made a mistake
[ ] found drugs somewhere
[ ] Thought you found the one
[ ]Cheated on your bf/gf
total: 1

[ ] Found out your bf/gf cheated
[x] Felt like the happiest person in the world
[x] Felt like dying
total: 2

[x] Prayed
[x] Have/had a crush
[x] Disliked someone
[x] been somewhere you werent supposed to be
total: 4

[x] Spread a rumor
[ ] Smoked a cigarette
[ ] Done something illegal
[ ] Vandalized
total: 1

Now add it up & multiply by 3 this is how experienced your life is.
69%

I SO WANT TO WATCH FLUSHED AWAY! ITS SO FUNNY AND SPASTIC! OMG HAHA. SO CUTE LAH. GO WATCH THE TRAILER! or rather watch both the trailers! YOU HAVE TO WATCH BOTH TRAILERS.

http://www.apple.com/trailers/dreamworks/flushedaway/

okay maybe its not as funny as you think, but i think its worth watching! its from the creators of Madagascar and Shrek! so i guess its SUPERLY niceniceNICE, heh.

Nine last

9. last place you were
spoly

8. last cigarette
i hate the smell of it already.

7. last beverage
like water?

6. last movie watched
death note.

5. last phone call
with my mum.

4. last song played
nvr play songs for a long time.

3. last bubble bath
haha i think i nvr had one.

2. last time you cried
ytd morning.

1. last time you got scolded
ytd morning too.

Eight, Have you ever.
8. have you ever dated someone twice
your date means what

7. have you ever been cheated on
i dont even have any ex.

6. have you ever kissed someone you shouldn't
no.

5. have you ever kissed someone you regret
nah.

4. have you ever fallen in love
im in love now! :D

3. have you ever lost someone
yea.i think i am losing one now.

2. have you ever been depressed
yeah like many a times.

Seven, Things you did in the past three days.
1. sleepover
nope. i <3>Six. People you can tell pretty much anything to.
1.haiyuan(:
2.elaine(:
3.kaiyu(:
4.melwee(:
5.chuinyin(:
6.deborah(:

Three Favorite colors.
1.green!
2.orange!
3.black!

Two things you want to do before you die.
1.say i love you to people i love!
2.state my will clearly.

BELIEFS
1. Sex before marriage?:
NO WAYYYYY. anti pre-marital sex.

2. Gay Marriage
another NO WAY.

3. Lowering the drinking age?
nah. whats the drinking age anyw?

4. Abortion
yuck ewwww. say no to abortion. its so cruel omg. dont remind me. and anyw, kids are rly cute.

5. Recycling?
eh heh. i dno actually.

So Far in '06 I had
Gotten shitty grades:
i had gotten grades that suck.

Fallen out of love
i fallen into it!

Done something you swore never to do
hahah yah.

Laughed until you cried
YES.

Went behind your parents back
quite a lot of times.

Lost a friend
yeah but we're back together again! YAYYYY.

Kept your new years resolution
i didnt even made any resolution for this year.

Forgot your new years resolution
hahaha.

Met someone who changed your life
YUPYUP! :p

Changed your outlook on life
eh i nvr really thought of that.

Left the state
to jb then yes.

Lost someone
no which is a good thing.

Gotten close to someone
haha yeah gotten close to many friends and x)

Given up something important to you
not sure :/

Found out who your true friends were
YEP!

Your age in 8 months:
15! :D

Do you like Christmas?
YESYES!

Is it your favorite holiday?
you can say so.

Where is your birthmark?
hmm here and there. haha.

would you rather go on MYSPACE or talk on the phone?
PHONE!

do you like talking on the phone in general?
yeah.

did you cook for yourself or did mom do the cooking?
mom.

what are you doing on Halloween?
this year i spend halloween performing on stage! yay. CHORAL&DRAMA NIGHTo6

wearing a costume? if so, what?
haha shirt and skirt.

do you consider "rap" music, or a bunch of effing noise?
yuck to both. but i'd choose rap.

what/who do you like to listen to?
manymany

did you do alot of swimming this summer?
IM GOING TO. yay.

have you ever done something/said something to a good friend that jeopardized therelationship?
guess i did but its definitely not on purpose then.

do you worry alot about something happening to your parents?
at times.

what person is on your mind right now, for any reason?
heh. for a lot of reason.

who did you talk to last?
talk as in sms or what? haiyuan.

what would you say is the most unique thing about you?
im a unique person overall! :DD

are you in a good mood today?
not bad.

what do you remember if you were really upset?
why will i try to rmb anyone when im upset?

are you distracted easily?
depends.

what would you say is your worst social habit? (in the way U treat people)
ah? that i dont know.

Who would you like to be stranded on an island with?
:p

Do you smile when you don't understand things?
yes or that blur look.

Were you overprotected as a child?
a bit.

who posted this before you?
meixian.

and last BUT NOT least . . . what's for dinner??
not sure.

________________________________

1. Song playing at the moment?
no song(:

2. Reasons for living?
nice people around.

3. Do you think you're ok?
uh hmm. definitely.

4. Ever donated blood?
nah.

5. Favorite color(s)?
orange green black white redpink! ALL(:

6. Accessories you usually wear?
watch. im a simple person, really.

7. One song to describe a heartbreak in the past?
no heartbreak in the past.

8. Last place you went to?
spoly.

9. Last person you went out with?
haiyuan:D

10. The most exciting sport?
theres so many to choose from!!

11. Ever had a baby?
NOOOO -.-

12. Movie you want to watch?
the sinking of japan. the grudge 2! im tempted but i cant watch cuz i'll totally freak out.

13. Any peircings?
nahnah.

14. The most romantic gift?
romantic? hmm i dont know.

15. Act on stage before?
since how old lor.

16. Struck by lightning before?
i'll try if it doesnt hurt.

17. Danced with your loved ones before?
loved ones? i nvr dance before leh. haha.

18. Ever wished you could turn back time?
yeah.

19. What would you do if you woke up one day to find yourself to be with someone from the opposite sex?
DEPENDS WHO. thats the most impt thing.

20. One song that's meaningful to you?
no idea.

21. Missing whoever now?
yesyesYESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS. badly.

22. What will you be doing tomorrow?
having a meeting and probably go out with my friends to watch movieeee.

23. Ever thought of robbing a bank?
nope.

24. One thing you totally regret doing/done?
lots of things, im just to lazy to think of anyone right now.

25. Do people like you?
hahah they love me which is a gd thing cuz i love them too.

26. What was the last game you played on the computer?
neopets! hahaha see how seriously bored i am.

27. Someone who means a lot to you at the moment?
YOU

28.The color of your bed?
i cant rmb.

29. Do you hate someone at the moment?
nah. like what jodie says "if you hate, means you care abt that person but because we dont, so we shall not hate"

30. What do you wish to happen now?
i wish i can be outside now.

31. Last time you ate pizza?
HAHAHA! I JUST ATE PIZZA. YAY ME :D

32. Ever been given a ring?
no x(

33. Do people think you're weird?
yes even i think im weird :P

34. Movies now showing that you hate?
horror, violence and gore movies. like The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning.

35. Most important thing in your room?
BEDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD!!!

36. Last movie watched?
death note 2 which was pretty long ago.

37. Last television show watched?
eh cant rmb haha.

38. Who is the person you want to see right now?
omg please dont remind me!!

39. Ever called a person useless?
haha yeah but its all on a joking jokiong manner.

40. Are you good at hiding your feelings?
not really, but if i really want to hide, then i can.

Fill in ever question and don't post w/o filling in every blank with at least a word.

1.Never in my life have I:
murder someone.

2. The last person I kissed was:
hahha you thats who :P

3. The one person who can drive me nuts, but then can always manage to make me smile:
elainechia.

4. The high school I go to is:
nanyang girls.

5. When I'm nervous :
my metabolism rate increases and i'll feel like shitting.

6. The last time I cried was:
this morning.

7. My hair:
what?

8. When I was 5, I:
had a halo above my head.

9. My Christmas last year:
was funnnnnnnnnnnnnnn!

10. When I turn my head to my right, I see:
my messy table.

11. I should be:
watching show.

12. When I look down I see:
my leg.

13. The craziest recent event was:
playing basketball just now. lots of screaming and fouls. it was superly crazy (:

14. By this time next year:
it'll be the holidays again.

15. I love:
everyone! :D

16. I have a hard time understanding:
sentences that twist here and there. im slow whattttt.

17. One time at a family gathering:
family gathering? like every weekend?

18. You know I like you if:
i tell you that!

19. Take my advice:
i think better not? haha ><

20. My ideal breakfast is:
i dont have any ideal breakfast. smth light and filling will do.

21. If you visit the place I grew up:
i dont think you'll feel the same way as i do.

22. Soon I plan on visiting:
vivo? hahah.

23. If you spend the night at my house:
you'll know how comfortable i have always felt when i sleep!

24. The world could do without:
bombs.

25. The most recent thing I bought
food!

26. My favourite brunette is:
?

27. The animals I would like to see flying besides birds are:
what a question. eh humans? we are mammals mah so = animals.

28. Last night I:
was tired and sleepy.

29. My birthday is on:
22ND APRIL!!

30. Tomorrow I am:
going to school early in the morning. gah.